If this plagues your family, you're not alone. Helping kids develop an interest in reading can be unbelievably difficult. After all, what kid wants to spend time with books when there are so many distractions? Video games, sports, television and movies, etc, can all draw a child's attention away from the all important quest for literacy. If your child is struck with the dreaded readingmakesmewanttocryitis disease, try using these five steps as a cure.

Keep it short

Thick books can be a deal killer. Think back to the first time a teacher required you to read a book that stretched beyond the 300-page mark. You may have enjoyed it... if you actually read it. Heavy books can be as frightening as any movie monster. Small books, on the other hand, are less intimidating. Short chapters, a total book length of 100-150 pages, and a satisfying conclusion will have your child screaming victory. And success breeds more success. If they finish it, they'll want to read more"�

Surrender to their wishes

We all want our kids to devour literary classics that will increase their vocabulary and turn them into geniuses. Children, however, don't always share the same desire. Books with tiny print, overly descriptive scenes, and long breaks between dialogue and action"� yeah, you can almost hear the Xbox turning on. Give them what they want. Goofy characters, tons of action, and-dare I say it-a smattering of mild potty humor to get them laughing. Once they've developed an interest in reading, then you can teach them the beauty of more advanced literature.

Read it with them

What? You mean I have to read that garbage too? Yeah, you do. And not just as a preview. When they say, "Mom, you've got to read this book!" The best way to encourage them to continue reading on their own is to take them up on the offer. Have your own matching bookmarks and when you hop ahead a chapter or two, tease them a little bit. "Oh, you're not going to believe what happens next!" Sharing in their excitement pays dividends.

Don't penalize with pages

Never use reading as a punishment. I had a child who hated going to the restroom because we would always send them to sit on the toilet for a "time out." Needless to say, we paid the price for our poor choice in judgment. Using a book as a way to punish will only leave a bad association in your child's mind. They'll wonder what they did wrong the next time you suggest they read for a bit.

Dangle the carrot

Many movies are based (at least partially) on books. The next time they preview a movie trailer and get excited about it, give your child an incentive to read the book first. If they finish before the movie is released, then plan a movie night with popcorn, candy, and other treats, and have your child invite a friend. In most cases, they'll appreciate the book more and may even join the ranks of the fans who always say, "Oh, the book is so much better than the movie!" At that point, sit back, kick your feet up, and smile wide with pride. That child of yours has developed a love of literacy that will last a lifetime!

The post 5 steps to help your child love to read appeared first on FamilyToday.

Our trials can depress us and drag us down, or they can be a source of growth and maturity. Our niece's sweet gentle personality is now coupled with strength and courage because of the difficulties she has experienced with leukemia. Our daughter is raising two wonderful grandchildren. Her soul has been refined and polished through her divorce experience. Our dear neighbor finds joy in her life even with Parkinson's disease. Some days she just endures the dizziness that comes from her medication; other days she can meet friends and enjoy their company. I see the courage in her eyes as she gets herself out and about.

A terrible car accident killed a young mother and her unborn baby, leaving behind a husband and several children. The cause: a drunk driver. Situations like this are tragic and difficult for a family to experience. I was impressed by the attitude of the husband and father. He knew it would be a difficult time for his family, but he didn't engage in bitterness or vindictiveness or say life was unfair. Even though he had many difficult trials ahead, he accepted them with the knowledge that his family would be healed and strengthened.

Sometimes the lessons learned from our trials dim as the years go by. Keeping a gratitude journal will preserve the wisdom we gain and bring positive energy into our lives. Emmons and McCullough, in the "Journal of Personality and Social Psychology," studied counting blessings verses counting burdens and found those who focused on daily blessings were more optimistic, vigorous, pleasant, and felt better able to handle life's troubles. Their sleep improved, and they were sick less often. They were more charitable and made greater progress toward their goals. If these are all attributes you would like in your life, include words of gratitude in your day to remember the strength you have gained from life's problems.

The post Learning from hard times appeared first on FamilyToday.

I was busy with one of motherhood's many forgettable tasks when one of my young sons came in complaining that his older brother had hit him. Frustrated as always with the constant tattling, I said, "Go hit him back."� What I heard myself saying in my mind was, "I'm tired of tattling, so work it out yourself. I'm sure you'll think of a peaceful way to do it and will go on to play nicely while leaving me alone."�

That wasn't quite what my son heard. He took me literally, went and found a hammer, and hit his brother on the head with it. When the bleeding child came in crying, his younger brother said to me, "You told me to hit him."�

Yes, but ...

As parents, we might know what we mean when, arriving at the grocery store, we tell our children, "Be good. Behave. Be nice."�

It is better, however, to make our expectations clear: "Do not touch anything. Walk beside me and hold onto the grocery cart - right here. Don't run down the aisle and don't push your brother. (Or hit him over the head with a hammer.)"�

With the expectations clearly in place, the children know exactly what behavior is expected of them and stand excuseless if they choose not to obey.

Younger children might require a review - or several - before the behavior is adopted.

Before a trip to the library where my little granddaughter has pushed other children who want to play with the same train, or are even close to the books she wants to see, my daughter reviews her expectations with her daughter.

"What don't we do in the library?"� she asks.

Usually, my granddaughter responds, "We don't push our friends. We don't hit our friends."�

When I was with them once, I saw a potential problem when a little boy about her age took over the train table. I saw my granddaughter struggle between the expectations she knew were in place and her natural tendency to get the offending "friend"� out of the way.

"What don't we do?"� I whispered.

"Push our friends,"� she answered. And that time she was able to make her behavior match the understood expectation.

In her mind it was much easier to understand "don't push other children"� rather than "be good."� 

At jobs, in school, at home, and out in the public, fulfilling expectations is much easier if those expectations are stated clearly at the correct age level and repeated as needed, and if the proper consequences are delivered when the expectations are not met.

Plus, no one gets hit with a hammer.

The post Go hit him back, and other unclear expectations appeared first on FamilyToday.

Take, for example, a time when I learned that I could have been a little more specific about what I expected my child to do. I was busy with one of motherhood's many forgettable tasks when one of my young sons came in complaining that his older brother had hit him. Frustrated as always with the constant tattling, I said, "Go hit him back."�

What I heard myself saying in my mind was, "I'm tired of tattling, so work it out yourself. I'm sure you'll think of a peaceful way to do it and will go on to play nicely while leaving me alone."�

That wasn't quite what my son heard. He took me literally, went and found a hammer, and hit his brother on the head with it. When the bleeding child came in crying, his younger brother said to me, "You told me to hit him."� Yes, but ... .

Be Specific

As parents, we might know what we mean when, arriving at the grocery store, we tell our children, "Be good. Behave. Be nice."� It is better, however, to make our expectations clear: "Do not touch anything. Walk beside me and hold onto the grocery cart ... right here. Don't run down the aisle and don't push your brother. (Or hit him over the head with a hammer.)"� With the expectations clearly in place, the children know exactly what behavior is expected of them and stand excuseless if they choose not to obey!

Teaching Younger Children

Younger children might require a review-or several-before the behavior is adopted. Before a trip to the library where my little granddaughter has pushed other children who want to play with the same train or are even close to the books she wants to see, my daughter reviews her expectations with her daughter.

"What don't we do in the library?"� my daughter asks. Usually, my granddaughter responds, "We don't push our friends. We don't hit our friends."�

When I was with them once, I saw a potential problem when a little boy about her age took over the train table. I saw my granddaughter struggle between the expectations she knew were in place and her natural tendency to get the offending "friend"� out of the way. "What don't we do?"� I whispered.

"Push our friends,"� she answered. And that time she was able to make her behavior match the understood expectation. In her mind it was much easier to understand "don't push other children"� rather than "be good."�

At jobs, in school, at home, and out in the public, fulfilling expectations is much easier if those expectations are stated clearly at the correct age level and repeated as needed, and if the proper consequences are delivered when the expectations are not met. Plus, no one gets hit with a hammer.

The post ‘Go hit him back’ and other things not to say to your child appeared first on FamilyToday.