1. We're best friends

We laugh, we cry, we eat ice cream and chocolate when we eat our feelings, and we know everything about each other. We send funny texts, pictures, and videos throughout the day and call just to see what the other is doing. When we come home to each other we're happy because the best of times never end when we're together.

2. We're in it for forever

Forget "for better or for worse, in sickness and in health". When we said "yes" to marriage, we happily volunteered to be stuck together forever. We've both pledged to always be a source of strength and support for our spouse. There's no space and no desire in our hearts to see another person the way we see our spouse. When you are together forever, you can either choose to suffer or to be happy. I'm pretty sure we chose to be happy.

3. Equal misery

In our marriage, there are times when we're "equally miserable". There are moments in life where it just sucks for both of you. Share the misery. Sometimes there's a day where only one of us can sleep in. Both of us want that extra hour of sleep, but either I get to sleep in, or my husband does. In these moments we choose to be "equally miserable". We wake up together and no one gets to sleep in. Sometimes we take turns, but when we both want the same thing and only one person can have it, we choose to be "equally miserable" together.

4. We share the remote

Whoa. I know this is a novel concept, but it's not superglued to his hand, so we share. We pick our TV shows together and we watch them together. When we watch the same things, sharing the remote comes naturally. Guys, what's the best way to get your wives to watch your sports games? Fill them in on who the players are. Women tend to respond to people rather than statistics. If we know the star player bought his mom a house or buys toys for orphans at Christmas time, we will want to see him succeed.

5. No one is a mind reader

We don't drop hints. I used to drop hints left and right and was frustrated when I didn't get my way or what I wanted. Newsflash: Our spouses don't always understand our hints. Just tell them what you want (cue in the Spice Girls: "what you really, really want") and you'll both understand each other.

6. We talk to each other

We tell each other our dreams, hopes, worries, and aspirations. We relive memories and we create new ones. We talk about our childhoods and our future together. And we listen to all of it. Sometimes it's a two minute conversation and sometimes things go on for hours. We put down and put away distractions and engage in these moment together.

7. We pray together

Some of the sweetest words I have ever heard were in the prayers of my husband. There's something wonderful about hearing him express a sincere desire for me to have a good day, to be safe, to have added strength in my trials. I love hearing him pray to be the companion I need him to be. When we grow closer to God, we grow closer to each other.

8. We tag-team our trials

When comparing marriage to a boxing match, we don't see ourselves as opposite opponents in the ring. We tag-team our trials and always stay in the same corner. Sometimes he's the fighter and I'm cheering him on, and sometimes I'm the fighter and he's the support. It doesn't do any good to fight each other while struggling through our own difficulties. Tag team it and lean on each other to get through your problems.

9. Trust and honesty

We don't have to be completely transparent about every detail of our lives, but if we feel the need to hide something, then that could signal a problem. Why would I need to hide anything from my BFF? Our emails, passwords, and accounts are accessible to both of us. We talk about things openly, and can look up information if we need to.

10. Intimacy

Sex? Yes, but that's not the only factor in marital intimacy. The best part of my day is when my hubby and I are laying in bed together; we say our good nights and our I love you's, and I face him. I close my eyes and know in my heart that this is exactly where I want to be. I'm happy here, and I'm loved. Then, right before we fall asleep, he finds my hand and holds it tight, or wraps a big, strong arm around my waist and pulls me in close, confirming my precious feelings with physical touch. That's intimacy. It's physical touch that affirms and makes secure a relationship built on friendship, trust, honesty, and love.

When done the right way with love and happiness, these seeminly ordinary things make an ordinary marriage awesome.

The post 10 seemingly ordinary things that can make your marriage awesome appeared first on FamilyToday.

Some people say you "lose yourself" when you have kids. And after the birth of my first child, that's exactly what happened. I lost myself and sacrificed personal dreams for family ones. After all these years, I learned that joy from families and personal happiness exist together. You just have to find the balance - here is how I did it:

Change my attitude

I decided and told myself that I will be happy now. Attitude change: check.

Act

I waited for tomorrow, next week and later to do things that would make me happy, so I changed that. Instead, I decided to do things that would make me happy now. I became productive, willing to serve, and able to set and accomplish goals. Now, I'm finding myself again and I'm happy.

Set goals

After six years of losing myself, I made a goal to do something incredibly difficult, time-consuming, and one that I would have to improve myself in many capacities in order for me to be successful in. It was a journey of happiness that would help me find myself and improve relationships. Setting realistic, positive goals helps us stay focused on good things.

Happiness is a choice. Being happy is a decision. Since I made the decision to be happy, I've lost 25 pounds in eight weeks through diet and exercise. My goal is to lose 35 pounds by the end of the month, and 70 pounds by July 19 (my eight-year wedding anniversary). I'm not on a strict diet, but I am trying to make healthier lifestyle choices. When I eat healthier most days, weight loss is faster. Weight loss is great, but overall I am shooting for progress.

Remember, progress is a process. We need to make better choices consistently before lifestyle changes happen. I had a bowl of ice cream every day last week, but instead of eating an entire bowl, I had two scoops. For me, that's progress. Instead of eating six chocolate donuts in one day, I had two in one day - progress.

I have been focusing on making progress with my chores as well. I washed and dried the clothes, folded them, put them away or hung them up in one day four times within the last eight weeks. I'm tooting my own horn, because with four little ones and mountains of laundry all the time, this is a huge deal. I also exercised six days each week for six out of the last eight weeks for 1.5-2 hours. Do you know what it's like getting four kids under five dressed (moms of multiples, you rock!) and out the door before 8:15 a.m.? It's difficult, but I did it and I'm proud of myself. In four months, I've made more progress of finding myself and improving in multiple areas than I have in the past six years. Maybe the past six years were small steps to get to where I am today, but either way, I'm getting to where I want to go. The biggest difference is that I'm choosing to be happy and my attitude is a source of strength now. I was always a happy person, but there's a special kind of happiness that comes when you seek it and choose it. This kind of happiness makes you want happiness for others as well.

It is almost like a conversion to happiness. You choose it, test it, and once you accept it, it brings about a special light and you want everyone else to have it too. I'm at the "I want happiness for everyone" stage right now. I know there will be days when my choice for happiness will be tested (like last week), but choosing happiness, sticking to your choice and pushing through the hard times will give you the strength you need to become who you want to be and help you get to your desired destination. I'm becoming who I want to be and I'm on the right track to my desired destination. It's a never ending trek uphill, downhill, in open water, and white water rapids, but so far, I like it.

Last week, I was holding my two youngest children in my arms (2 and 11 months) and we passed a mirror. We all smiled in it and for the first time in six years, I recognized "me." It was instant. I literally felt the thought, "There you are, Emi." I have multiple roles, but I finally saw "me" instead of a face with many responsibilities. The moment in the mirror was a moment of clarity.

At the end of the movie "Wreck-it Ralph," Ralph realizes he's a "bad guy," but not a bad guy. I'm a mom, but I'm not just a mom. I'm Emi. I'm someone who has interests and hobbies, and likes building snowmen, swimming, eating chocolate (and sweets in general), and being with family and friends. I'm not defined by my roles, but my roles can help me become a better person if I choose to let them.

I'm getting to where I want to go. Changing my attitude to choosing happiness and doing things that make me happy were my first steps.

What will be your first step to choosing happiness?

The post 3 simple ways to choose happiness now appeared first on FamilyToday.