"So...are you dating anyone?" As a single adult(ish) person, you are already preparing yourself for the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays where you'll probably attend church or other events with your parents and be asked this question many times.

It may sometimes get a little tiring responding to that question, and perhaps it's exhausting to be constantly asked if you can be set up with someone. You may be tired of getting bridal shower, wedding, and then baby shower announcements from others, while the days, months and years seem to pass without being any closer to that yourself.

I used to feel that way, too. But not anymore

Several years ago, I decided to wise up. I started asking myself why it bothered me to be asked if I was dating someone. Did it bother me because I was jealous of others' happiness? Heavens no! I prayed for others to find someone to share their lives with. And I set people up like it's a side business! Was it because I didn't want to be dating anyone and it annoyed me? Also a negative. I do want to be dating someone. Was it because it brought to the forefront so readily the fact that I was still single? Most likely.

But my perspective changed when I started to look at it differently.

We live in a confused time where the ideas of marriage are ridiculed. We tell women they don't need men in their lives. We tell men they can do as they please. We hear all around us that we are better off building our lives separately and then perhaps coming together if it's convenient. We are told fathers and mothers are not important to a successful family, that children are not necessary, that children can wait, that motherhood isn't really all that great, that marriage is actually a pain, that commitment is for the birds (and not even them really!) and that a life well-lived is a life lived for yourself.

But when people encourage me to get married or tell me they can't wait to see who I'm going to marry, my hope is restored.

When I read awesome blogs about how couples are making their marriages work or how motherhood is wonderful, it reminds me of the ideal I am seeking for. There is much that belittles and downplays marriage and families these days.

I don't need any more of that.

I need those who choose to defend the family. So thank you to those who are relentlessly interested in whether or not I've found someone yet because that means you are still promoting marriage.

Thank you to those who still believe in happy marriages

Thank you to those who have beautiful marriages and have shown what love really is.

Thank you to those who have struggled in their marriages, but have shown that commitment and sacrifice and selflessness, supersede prideful ambitions.

Thank you to those who have seen marriages fail or had your own marriage fail, yet still propose it as one of God's greatest blessings when couples work together in faith.

Thank you to those who are barely beginning their marriages and are so devoted to each other that you even forget to talk to your single friends (OK, so that's a half-hearted thank you. Seriously, can't we still be friends?).

There is something remarkable and wonderful about marriage that I don't fully comprehend just yet. But God himself said, "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" (Genesis 2:24). That is powerful. That is love.

So, at least for me, I don't mind it when you ask me those questions. In fact, please do. And please tell me how much you hope that I will marry someone wonderful. Please tell me how marriage is hard work, but that it's worth it. Please tell me about love and forgiveness in your marriages. Please keep telling me. Please keep reminding me. There are enough nay-sayers in the world. I think we all need some more YAY-sayers.

This article was originally published on Write on. It has been republished here with permission.

The post The dreaded holiday question: are you dating someone? appeared first on FamilyToday.

You've seen the studies. You've heard that being connected to your device all the time is precisely what is disconnecting you from the world. You may even recognize that you have entered the Zombie Apocalypse - a world full of people walking around, staring down and wildly swerving through crowds — in a state of living, but not really life.

You're probably reading this as you're scrolling through your social feed on your phone or tablet right now. But somewhere in your mind, you clicked on an article about trying to free yourself from your phone. Because somewhere in that mind, you realize you probably need to.

Consider these seven simple tips to limiting your phone usage:

1. Wear a watch

I used to check my phone a lot because I "needed" to know what time it was. Watches are more discreet, not nearly as dishonest (because let's face it, you were really checking to see if someone was messaging you back), and they actually do tell you what time it is. Fancy that.

2. Turn off notifications

Notifications are probably the biggest offender in screen-time usage. If you have them set on your email accounts, your social accounts and your IM and message apps, you could be getting notifications all day long. While you may need one or two of these accounts to be readily available, you don't need to know right away about every person who joins Instagram, every re-pin of your pins, retweet of your tweets, or piece of junk email that arrives. Is reading a stranger's comment on your friend's post really so important you have to know right away? Consider shutting off notifications and checking in on things a little less often.

3. Leave your cell phone alone

I recently read an article in the Harvard Business Review titled "Just Hearing Your Phone Buzz Hurts Your Productivity," as well as a study in "Social Psychology," titled "The Mere Presence of a Cell Phone May be Distracting." Both portray how just having your phone with you or near you is distracting, and makes you less productive.

So put it away. At work, leave it in your bag or set it where you can't see it, on silent. If you're going to visit someone, consider leaving your phone in the car, so it's not even with you. If you cannot handle not looking at your phone for a time, that's probably a sure sign you need to disconnect a little.

4. Silence your phone

Try keeping your phone on silent whenever you don't actually need it. Or — gasp — turn it off when you're in important places or situations to avoid rude and unnecessary interruptions.

5. Use your laptop or desktop

Cell phones and tablets are convenient when out and about. But they're also slower for doing real work. Google Voice and Swyping will rarely be as fast as typing. If you have an email to send, an invite to create or a lengthy item to post, consider using your laptop or desktop. It will save you a little time and keep you off your phone, too.

6. Call people

I know it's old school. But isn't that what you're going for - less staring-at-your-screen time? We've all had those half-hour back and forth texting conversations that could have easily been solved with a two-minute phone call. Evaluate the type of conversation you need to have and determine if a text can appropriately resolve things, or if a phone call would be better and more meaningful.

7. Be where you are

Choose to be present where you are, without the distractions of your phone. Enjoy the time with friends, with family, with co-workers, even by yourself, instead of letting your phone be an indicator that you have more important things to do. Use your phone when necessary, then put it away again.

Giving these seven habits a try may leave you feeling a bit lost for a while; but you will also feel a little less distracted, a little more productive and a lot more connected to the people around you. Don't worry; your phone will get along just fine without you.

The post 7 ways to free yourself from your phone (and why you should) appeared first on FamilyToday.