Nothing prepares you for the moment when your first child lays in your arms. The surreal feeling of holding a living miracle who just spent nine months developing in your womb defies logic.

Those first thoughts as a mom that flood your consciousness last forever. I'm pretty sure not even dementia could erase these intrinsic memories. The evening of January 7, 1994 still echoes through my spirit. God welcomed our first-born son into the world, confident my husband and I were capable of caring for and nurturing his precious gift. Here are nine thoughts which flashed across my mind in the first minute of becoming a parent:

1. LOVE. An all-encompassing miracle that is mine to hold forever.

2. You are mine. My child, my responsibility, my precious gift. I am your mom!

3. You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

4. Do you know who I am? Do you recognize my voice? Can you sense my love?

5. How on earth did God form this child from a sperm and egg?

6. How can features so small be so perfect? Eyes, nose, mouth, lips, ears, fingers, toes, hands, feet, face, fingernails all tiny and proportionate. It's breathtaking.

7. I will go to the ends of the earth and do everything in my power to protect you.

8. What does it feel like to be out in the world after being snuggled in my womb all this time?

9. I don't ever want to let go of you.

Writing this list and remembering the emotions floods my heart with gratitude for the gift of children. God blessed my husband and me with three of his children to care for. We are now entering our second year of an empty nest, with 22 years of parenting steeped in our hearts and minds.

The journey of child rearing rivals no other experience. Each age, stage, moment, and season provides blessings and opportunities for growth both as a person and a mother. My children have been my greatest teachers.

Letting them go has been difficult, but I am forever thankful for the privilege of calling them mine.

Some day, God willing, I look forward to hearing about the first minute of their experience becoming a parent. A moment when the love comes full circle and new memories are made.

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This painting was a tenth anniversary gift from my husband, John. His own hand brushed the vibrant colors across the canvas. We are beachy types, preferring sand and sun for most of our vacations.

The number of sunsets which have spray-painted the skies while we settled on the shoreline is too large to count. From Hilton Head Island, South Carolina, to Punta Cana, we have held hands under the same radiant kaleidoscope display above glistening waters on fifteen beaches across five states and three countries.

John's milestone sentiment of love speaks volumes about our journey of love and friendship. When he asked me to fly with him twenty-three years ago, I was completely unaware of what our flight path would include.

With my "I do," though simple and overflowing with enthusiastic love, I entered the plane rolling a hefty load of baggage behind its tender oath - naiveté, selfishness, brokenness, insecurity, expectation, immaturity and low self-worth, to name a few.

Now, more than two decades in, as I look back on the route, detours, layovers and destinations, my heart fills with awe and wonder at all God has taught me. And I pray for the blessing to continue racking up frequent flyer insight for years to come.

Here are some of the soul-altering lessons gleaned from the moment I stepped off the altar with my amazing soul mate to jet set into the realm of marriage.

1. I was selfish when I said, "I do"; as for marriage, I had no clue.

2. Expectations are a silent plague infiltrating the heart when talk is vague.

3. Communication is a must - honest and raw. The lack thereof is Murphy's Law.

4. Children bring unending delight. Parent as a team, strive not to fight.

5. Crisis reveals the inner heart and prayer is a necessary place to start.

6. As we learn to give by removing "me," we build up our spouse in unity.

7. Reaching high to touch our king tightly binds our covenant strings.

8. When love rests in the shadow of his grace, harmony and peace win the race.

9. Love at first sight can last; it has for me, via treating our sacrament with dignity.

10. Laughter heals many hurts, containing power to defuse the worst outburst.

11. Grace is real even if we aren't religious. Being married is full of forgiveness.

12. Every day is a gift amid joy and pain. A spirit of gratitude keeps us sane.

13. No use trying to change our mate, it's hard enough to alter our own poor traits.

14. Writing letters is better than talking. They allow us to listen without the balking.

15. Fights are sometimes a necessary vice, but mending is easier when we argue nice.

16. Try not to take things personal. We can usually relate to the issue with role reversal.

17. Love our spouse where they're at. Meeting them there avoids any brickbat.

18. Learning our partner's love language has to happen. Read the book by Gary Chapman.

19. Respect is a lifeline for relationships to thrive, essential for sacred vows to survive.

20. The little things gain meaning as time goes by. Don't let "taking for granted" be an alibi.

21. Marriage requires investment and conscious choice. Always give our spouse a voice.

22. We can sail the seas of better and worse if 1 Corinthians 13 is our verse.

23. We should live to love and serve, serve, serve ...

As an exclamation point to my simple list, here are powerful words from Ruth Bell Graham, "I pity the married couple who expect too much from one another. It is a foolish wife who expects her husband to be that which only Jesus Christ can be: always ready to forgive, totally understanding, unendingly patient, invariably tender and loving, unfailing in every area, anticipating every need, and making more than adequate provision. Such expectations put a man under impossible strain."

Twenty-three years of unconditional love from a man who chooses to serve, the blessing of three beautiful children and the gift of incalculable personal growth ... My cup runneth over, and under, and around, and beyond.

The post 23 soul-altering lessons I’ve learned from 23 years of marriage appeared first on FamilyToday.