Gregg Murset – FamilyToday https://www.familytoday.com Here today, better tomorrow. Fri, 08 Mar 2013 08:22:36 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=5.8.3 https://wp-media.familytoday.com/2020/03/favicon.ico Gregg Murset – FamilyToday https://www.familytoday.com 32 32 Allowance: It’s not your money anymore https://www.familytoday.com/family/allowance-its-not-your-money-anymore/ Fri, 08 Mar 2013 08:22:36 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/allowance-its-not-your-money-anymore/ When, how often, and how much allowance to pay can be a puzzle. But one thing is certain - the…

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Home is the best place for kids to learn about money

Giving your children an allowance will give them an opportunity to learn how to manage their money while the cost is minimal.

But when do you start giving an allowance, how often and how much do you give, and should receiving an allowance be tied to completing chores?

Every family is different, and there are no right or wrong answers to these questions, but here are some things to think about when deciding what will work for you.

What age?

Around 3 years old, children are eager to learn about money, and by 5 years old they are willing to save their money for a short amount of time. At a very young age, children will start to see that money has power, but it will take time for them to understand just how much value money has. A good time to start giving an allowance is when your child is able to understand the concept of money: the idea that money is exchanged for merchandise. The more experience they have with money the faster they will understand.

How often?

Time is long when you are young. You should plan on giving an allowance at least once a week. You can stretch that out further as children get older. But, whenever you decide to pay them, stick to it. Be dependable, just like your pay check, and show them you can honor your obligations. Figure out the logistics, like when they will get a "raise" just like a business deal.

How much?

Some people will say that a dollar for each year of their age is appropriate. Others will ask friends how much they give and match it. If you don't like either of those ideas, you can figure out a good number by comparing two things.

First, measure how much you already give them. You'll probably find that giving them an allowance will be cheaper for you than the incidentals that you already pay for.

Next, decide what you expect them to pay for when they do get an allowance. Consider spending, (toys, candy, clothing, entertainment) saving, (for when they want something that costs more than their weekly allowance) and sharing (church, charitable organizations, and gifts for friends and family).

Should allowance be tied to chores?

Everyone has responsibilities as members of the family that shouldn't have to be rewarded with money. Children can develop a sense of entitlement when they are receiving something for nothing. Maybe the answer is somewhere in the middle. They receive an allowance, certain personal and household chores are expected, but they have the option of working harder for the extra things that they want.

It's not your money anymore

Probably one of the hardest things to do when you give an allowance is to let it go. When you give your kids an allowance, it's not your money anymore. You can give them helpful advice on how to spend it more productively or what purchases to avoid, but in the end, you have to remember that this is their time to learn how to manage their money. Yes, they will make mistakes, but it is so much better to let them learn from their own successes and failures.

When, how often, and how much allowance to pay can be a puzzle. But one thing is certain - the best place for kids to learn about money is at home.

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How to nurture high achieving children https://www.familytoday.com/family/how-to-nurture-high-achieving-children/ Wed, 28 Nov 2012 17:13:35 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/how-to-nurture-high-achieving-children/ Do you have a child who remembers all the answers, consistently performs at the top of their group, or is…

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Do you have a child who remembers all the answers, consistently performs at the top of their group, or is creative beyond your understanding? Or maybe, your child is not very talented naturally, but they have an inner need to succeed, and therefore drive themselves and everyone around them crazy. Maybe, as a parent, you have wondered if you tend to push your child more than necessary, regardless of their abilities. Do you find it difficult to find the line between encouraging and pushing? Do you wish you could better help your child balance achievement with happiness?

Parents need to step in and protect children from all the things that over-pressure, over-work, and over-schedule them. Parents need to set healthy boundaries between their own ambition, and the needs of their children.

Goal vs. Wish

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Agoalis something that is personal. You have control over it because you can make the changes necessary to make it happen. It can be in your future. You have goals for yourself.

Awish as something that you have no control over. It depends on someone else. You can wish that your child could win the spelling bee, or the tournament, but it is really up to them whether or not that will happen.

Achievement by proxy is when a parent's need for fame, wealth, and recognition is gained through their children. A line is drawn at the point where a parent's needs start separating from the goals of the child.

First,

take a look at your own life and distinguish between what your goals are and what you wish for your child.

Next,

talk with your child to ascertain if the path they are on is leading them to their goals. As a parent, isn't that really what we want for them?

Now,

you can effectively determine if the advancements of your child are your wishes or their goals.

It's fun to be a kid

Have you and your child forgotten that it's fun to be a kid? Has unstructured time become a waste of time? For some reason, life can get too busy to have fun anymore. Unstructured play time can be just as beneficial and educational as class, after class, after class.

  • Take time out to enjoy the simple pleasures of play.

  • Encourage them to have more human time.

  • Goof around a little.

  • Smile and laugh and play more.

They will be adults sooner than you think, and you can't go back in time to do it over again.

Love them for who they are, not what they do

No matter how hard they study, or how long they practice, or what award or competition they win (or don't win), let them know that your love is unconditional. Do not withhold your love and affection to change their behavior. Do not use your attention as a form of punishment or device for control. Make it clear that you will always be there for them and that they are loved.

Every parent wants their children to be healthy, successful, and talented. You can help them the most by differentiating between your goals and their goals, letting them have some fun, and loving them no matter what. You can encourage them to do their best, without pushing them over the edge.

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10 ways to make chores fun https://www.familytoday.com/family/10-ways-to-make-chores-fun/ Fri, 26 Oct 2012 13:32:14 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/10-ways-to-make-chores-fun/ Does everyone in your family run the other direction when you say the word "chores"? Making chores fun may be…

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Does everyone in your family run the other direction when you say the word "chores"? Making chores fun may be the way to please everyone. Mom and Dad get the help they need and the kids have fun along the way.

Here are 10 ideas to get the job done, happy style.

1. Different Name, Different Game

Mission Impossible, Duty Board, Weekly Assignments, Family Game Time, Max is in Charge Of, Requirements for the Day, and the list goes on. Call it something different and you may get a better response.

2. Money, Money, Money

Does money speak louder than words at your house? Having each chore receive a certain monetary amount will definitely be an incentive for getting the work done. How about hiding coins or small bills throughout their room and they have to clean up to find the money. Non-monetary rewards are also an incentive. How about, whoever cleans their room first gets to stay up half an hour later that night?

3. Music

Turn on some music with a good beat and dance those chores away. Music can lift your spirits and it makes the time go by faster. Make sure it's a song that your kids will enjoy - not just one for you.

4. Make it a Game

Be judge, and sentence them to jail if they aren't helping. Have a contest to see who can pick up the most items. Be pirates and go on a treasure hunt to find the missing shoe. Pretend you are filming a cleaning commercial as you wash the bathroom. Pick a particular color and have everyone clean up everything that matches that color. Play the lottery and pull out different chores from a hat.

5. With Parents

My children each have an evening where they are responsible for washing the dishes and cleaning the kitchen after dinner. When I have something else to do and I leave, it seems to take them all evening to finish them and they have to be reminded to stick to task several times. When I am able to stay and help out a little, it always seems to go faster. Not only that, but I get a great chance to spend some one on one time with them and talk about how life is going.

6. Benefits of Friends

Everything is more fun with friends. We had planned to pull the weeds in the back yard on a Saturday morning and were contemplating how to get our teenage girl to help out. She wanted to invite her boyfriend. We were skeptical at first, but not only was she up and ready to go at the appointed time, but she was more than helpful, and more cheery than we expected.

7. Kid-Sized Tools

It's always more fun when you have your own tools and when they are kid-sized too, even better. Make sure they can't hurt themselves with the cleaning solutions and then send them on their way with their own spray bottle. Cut off brooms or small gloves make the job more fun too.

8. Spic and Span in 10

Set the timer and see how much can get done in the allotted time. Call it "Spic and Span in Ten" and do it at the same time each day. Doing it right before Daddy gets home is a great way to have the house picked up and presentable before dinner. Or right before bed means that you get to wake up to a clean house in the morning.

9. Dress Up

Super Clean Man and Princess Cinderella have magical powers and they can clean up everything. They can even pick up after the messy kids that live in this house!

Chores don't have to be a bore. Try something different every now and then to make mundane, everyday chores, a little entertaining.

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How to teach wise money management to kids https://www.familytoday.com/family/how-to-teach-wise-money-management-to-kids/ Fri, 26 Oct 2012 13:31:50 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/how-to-teach-wise-money-management-to-kids/ Have you ever wished that you had learned how to manage your money better as a kid? Teaching your children…

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Have you ever sat across from your spouse, with all of your bills and financial obligations spread out across the table, wishing that you would have learned how to manage your money better as a kid? Teaching your children wise money management will benefit them now and in the future.

Start young

Money is all around us. We earn it and use it every day. It is a part of our life at every stage. Teaching our children while they are young to manage $5 will help them handle $50 when they are teenagers, and ultimately $500 and even $5,000 or more, when they are adults.

Instill a work ethic

Teaching kids how to earn their money will be a lifelong blessing. Start young with chores. Chores will teach them diligence, timeliness, thoroughness, and how to follow instructions. Chores prepare our children to live independently. Indulging our kids with an allowance based on something for nothing, will create feelings of entitlement and selfishness. 

Working and helping at home evolves over time into getting a job outside of the house. As adults, we have many responsibilities and we continually have to prioritize to get things accomplished. What better place than home could there be, for a teenager to learn how to juggle a job along with school, home, and friends. Then when they leave home, a job will already be a part of their life.

Establish needs vs. wants

Every child wants the most trendy toys, the latest extreme recreational activities, the newest techno-devices, the most expensive make-up, or the brand name clothes. You are probably saying to yourself that every adult wants those things too. A fair assumption. A problem arises when you want those things, but can't afford them. Helping your child distinguish early between needs and wants, will help them make wise consumer purchases throughout life.

Set money goals

Sit down with your child and decide on short term and long term money goals. Things like going to the football game this weekend would be a short term goal. Saving up for a car when they are 16 years old is a long term goal. Be realistic and don't get discouraged. Share with them some things you have had to save up for, and give them ideas of how you did it. Having to wait for something that they want will instill a more grateful attitude in them.

Budget

When your child has a more steady income, show them how to make a budget, and balance their checking account. Instead of getting to the end of the week and not having enough money for gas, tracking their cash flow, in and out, will help them visualize where their money is going. Help them realize that when their money is gone, it is gone and the only way to make it stretch further is to budget it better next time. Suggest that they be prepared for some unexpected expenses as well.

Savings - bank it

Instead of a piggy bank that can be raided at the first sound of the ice cream truck, help them get a savings account at a bank. It requires a higher commitment level to put it in, and leave it there. Hold back the urge to bail out your child when their savings aren't enough for their desired purchase. Help them learn from their mistakes and save more next time.

Money management can elude us all at times. With a bit of luck, helping our children learn a good work ethic, the difference between needs and wants, and how to set goals, budget, and save their money will ensure that throughout life, they will be in charge of their money, instead of their money controlling them.

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5 smart saving tips for kids https://www.familytoday.com/family/5-smart-saving-tips-for-kids/ Fri, 26 Oct 2012 12:56:43 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/5-smart-saving-tips-for-kids/ Rather than allowing them to raid their piggy banks at the first sound of the ice cream truck, teaching your…

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Establishing smart money-saving techniques and good spending habits early in life will empower your children to live debt free and help them to manage their money better. Here are five tips to get them started.

Begin young

Children of different ages will have different understandings of money, but you should start them young by explaining to you children why you go to work. Make it clear to your kids that everything around them costs money. Start off with a small container for them to save their change in, like a piggy bank. If they want a candy at the store, explain to them that they have to save their money in their bank, until you go to the store, and then they can buy the candy.

Help them save

When you feel that they're old enough, get your children their own savings accounts. This is unlike a piggy bank in that they can't go and raid it at the first sound of the ice cream truck; it requires a higher level of commitment. A savings account will make them feel special, and give them a sense of responsibility.

Encourage your children to put some of what they make into their savings. Go one step further and suggest that they put a percentage into savings, keep a certain percentage to enjoy now, and share or give a percentage to a charity or a good cause. A great place to see this process in action is at MyJobChart.com. This is an online chore chart where kids are encouraged to save, spend, and share the money that they earn.

Having a savings account at a bank will also give you an opportunity to explain interest to you children, and how it works. When they realize that their money will be making money just sitting there, without any effort on their part, they may be more willing to leave it there.

Bargain Shop

We've all heard the old adage, "A penny saved is a penny earned." When your kids want a big ticket item, have them do their research. They can look online, at different stores, and at different brands, to see where they can find the best deal. They may be able to find a similar, cheaper alternative to what they were looking for.

For younger children, involve them in your shopping. Instead of always saying "NO" to their requests for you to purchase something for them, give them a job at the grocery store to keep them busy. Ask them to look for the cheapest peanut butter and then they'll probably stop asking for the cookies you just passed by. Have them help unload at the checkout stand to lessen the demands for candy on your way out.

Teach by Example

Discipline yourself, and be an example to your children. Show them your savings account, and inform them when you are making a deposit into the bank. Shop wisely and save for big purchases instead of buying on credit. Impart to your children the restraint it takes to save for a bigger purchase, but how nice it is in the end. They will see you saving, and want to do the same.

Give Them Freedom

Encourage your children to save, but if they decide not to, wait for the teaching moment instead of getting mad at them for not following your advice. Wait until they want something and don't have the money to buy it, and then point out that if they would have saved a little of their birthday money last month, they would probably have enough to go to the movies this weekend. The teaching moment is gone if you bail them out. If they don't have the cash to buy the expensive bike that they want, and ask for your help to cover the difference, make them wait until they've saved up enough money. They will be upset, but in the long run, they will have learned a valuable lesson.

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