Communication is one of the things that can make or break a marriage - depending on how efficient your form of communication is. This is why women get a bad reputation for nagging, which is not the most efficient way to get things done...yet continue to do it anyway.

So why does your wife nag?

1. She's not your maid

If your typical routine is to come home from work, sit on the couch and not move until it's time for bed, there's your problem. That's why she keeps asking you to do the same things: Clothes go IN the laundry hamper, not right next to it. Peels and wrappers go into the garbage. That mess you made from making lunch? You can spare the two minutes it takes to clean it up.

You might think it's not a big deal - She can pick up a pair of socks from the family room floor, right? But so can you!

Yes, picking up a pair of socks is easy but if you say that about every little thing, it adds up.

What to do

Take a few seconds and look around before leaving a room; The less of a mess you leave, the happier your wife will be.

2. She isn't sure you're listening

If your wife asks you to take out the garbage, how long does it usually take you to do it? If you're a person who doesn't respond right away, or someone who forgets the favor while staring at the TV, that's why she has to rephrase and repeat the question...constantly.

Maybe she wasn't heard or no one listened to her when she was younger. Maybe she is trying to get things done and could use some help. That's why talking, with actual words and not grunts, is important in your relationship. Talk about it and understand where each of you is coming from.

What to do

It's not hard to stop whatever you're doing and look her in the eyes and acknowledge the question. Promise to really talk to her. When she's talking, listen. There's nothing better for building a better relationship than being heard.

3. She can't do it all alone

Contrary to popular belief, not all women want to do everything a man does. And if you've done her a favor in the past (like putting holes in the walls for pictures) chances are she'll wait for you to do those tasks.

The "honey-do" list seems like something to laugh at, but if you actually make progress on them, she will know that you will get to it and won't need to nag. Whether it's putting together a set of shelves so she can get things organized or touching up the paint, take a project and set aside the time to get it finished.

What to do

If this task will take two days to complete, take a day off of work and work on it or schedule out your weekend plans accordingly. There's nothing worse than starting a project and then waiting another six months to get it finished or to work on it again. If it takes 15 minutes, start at half-time and get back before any of the action starts.

Be courteous and give your wife a timeline of your schedule and when you think her project will be finished. Put a finish date on the family calendar. That way, you're both on the same page and there won't be a need to nag.

4. You don't spend enough time with her

When you get married, any and all best friends should take the back seat. Your wife should be your best friend. She should be the one you go to for advice. If you have a problem between the two of you, you discuss it with her, not your friends.

Your wife might nag about you going out so much because in reality, you are going out too much. How often do you take her on a date or sit down and have an in-depth conversation with her?

You might think, "I need guy time." But what about "wife time"? If it's so important to get out of the house, take her with you. Include her on what's going on in your life and the decisions you're making. It all affects her future too.

What to do

Set aside time to be with her, not only intimately but for daily conversations and date nights.

Ultimately, if she nags, it means she still cares and wants to see a change. Even though nagging isn't the best way to communicate, it is a way she is trying to reach you. Talk about your relationship, the quirks and pet peeves, and make changes to improve your relationship instead of just being annoyed.

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As we get busier, there are a lot of things that get cut from our routine. Eating dinner as a family may seen small and inconvenient, but it is one of the best ways to build a strong relationship with your family:

Teaches good eating habits

You've probably had a night or two some when an event gets in the way of a home cooked meal. Once in a while isn't a big deal, but having this happen every night of the week is harmful. After so many nights of fast-food, your body begins to feel sluggish.

Plan your meals for the week on either Saturday or Sunday while looking at a calendar of this week's activities. Plan to use easy crock pot meals on busy nights so your family can still eat a home cooked meal. Make sure you have the ingredients for each meal; running to the store for one or two items each night will take up time you could be spending with your family.

Try to come up with only one night where you eat out and have dinner at home the rest of the nights. Share the plan with your family and get your kids involved. Use family dinners to teach them about healthy eating habits. Pledge to use real ingredients and add more fruits and vegetables to the mix.

Set the standard early for your family to eat at home to help your kids make good choices when they go to college or have families of their own.

Learn proper etiquette

Do you know someone who doesn't have the best manners when they're eating? Maybe they reach over everyone to get to the food first or they burp several times throughout the meal. Is this how you want your family to act when they're eating with other people?

I'm not saying your family has to know how to set the table for a 12-course meal, but saying the simple things like, "Please pass the asparagus" and "Thank you" are a good start.

Teach your family how to properly portion out food for themselves and others in the family. Show them the value of using a napkin to wipe their mouth and hands on. Demonstrate the way to use utensils instead of hands when serving and eating a meal. Some of these seem basic but if you didn't learn it at home, chances are you learned it the hard way further down the road.

Bond and connect with your family

Sitting down without any electronics creates an atmosphere where family members can share thoughts, stories and ask questions. Use dinner together to sit down at a table, take your time eating and enjoy each other's company. Use this time to to talk and learn about each other; there aren't many other times throughout the day where you can connect like this. Take the opportunity to have meaningful conversations with your kids and your spouse.

Use dinner time to listen. Get to know the people in your family's lives. Being able to talk openly now means opening doors of communication later on in life.

See problems and give advice

No matter how old your kids are, any good advice you can give to guide them through life is helpful. You might not think they always hear you but they might surprise you. If you can give that advice when they aren't distracted (like at family dinner), it makes it that much more probable that the advice will sink in.

Sometimes we have to read between the lines when it comes to how a child feels. When asked how the day went, the standard answer might be, "Good". But you can tell in their tone or in their body language how it really went. From there you can use what you've learned from previous dinners to help them get through whatever problem or concern they have.

Take the time to have family dinner. Make it a priority and as you work towards consistency, it will become a cherished time for your family.

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Most people around the world are constantly checking their social media platforms several times a day. Facebook is probably the most used as it serves several functions. While it may seem harmless to mindlessly scroll through to see what your friends or friends-of-friends are doing but, if not kept in check, it can do some serious damage to your marriage.

Now is the time to check yourself. Is Facebook coming between you and your spouse in one or more of these 5 ways?

1. Wasting time

Since smart phones have become the norm, it seems like whenever there is a down moment, we click through our apps mindlessly. It's our way to beat boredom and may seem like something small. "It's no big deal" you might think but just a few minutes can easily turn into several hours if you're not careful. It might not be all in one sitting but 10-15 minutes at a time, several times a day can suck up your time, and your relationship can suffer.

Marriage takes work and good communication to keep going and even if we're sitting in the same room, nothing grows if we aren't actually talking to one another. If you aren't connecting at least daily, you're probably starting to drift apart.

Solution

Make a rule to put the phones in another room at a certain time and then enjoy the rest of the night with each other. The first few times might be a little awkward and your fingers might be itching to text or "like" a million status updates but as you start talking to one another, you can learn so many things you didn't know before, even if you claim to know everything there is about your spouse.

2. Lost art of communication

One question to ask ourselves is where do we go first to talk about something. Are we talking to our spouse first, or do we immediately go to Facebook to find comfort? There are countless posts of how we feel after certain events, whether they make us happy, sad, mad, etc. Many post such things in order to feel validated or that the number of likes and comments they get is a way to make them feel their worth.

Your spouse shouldn't have to read about how things are going in your life on Facebook. And if he/she finds out from social media, it sends the message that they are only as important in your life as everyone else in cyberspace.

Solution

Take the time to talk to your spouse about difficult things or exciting news in person before you let the world know what is going on in your life. Yes, it's nice to have other people be excited for you but no one should be more so than your spouse.

3. Connecting with the wrong people

We all have a history before we get married and sometimes we wonder "what might have been." Just looking up an ex-boyfriend/girlfriend out of curiosity might seem harmless, but it might be the beginning of a wedge in your marriage. Protecting your marriage begins with staying faithful to your spouse and infidelity doesn't always mean that you had an affair with someone. Once your thoughts start to focus on something or someone outside of your marriage, it can be difficult to get things back in order.

Solution

Don't go there. It's not worth breaking up your marriage even when it seems like such a small thing. And most of all, be open with your spouse about who you communicate with online. That way, it takes out any of the "dirty little secret" feeling.

Maybe even make a rule to avoid members of the opposite sex. It sounds extreme but safeguarding your marriage is more important than how many friends and followers you have.

4. Oversharing your relationship

We all have that friend that shares every. single. thing. about their relationship on Facebook. They seem like they are happy one minute and the next they are spewing fire about the one they love. The hardest part about that is you never know who can see that. It will do more damage than good. Sharing the good about them is nice, every once in a while.

Let's say you got into an argument with your spouse and then posted about it. People will comment that they sympathize with you and it might make you feel better, like people are on your side. But things like this can change the way people perceive your spouse. They may not be bad altogether but we all have a bad day and one small incident doesn't define them. You don't want to damage how others think of your spouse.

Solution

Talk to your spouse about what is happening or how the situation makes you feel. When you communicate with them, it leaves everyone else out of the equation and you will be closer. Don't involve your parents or your friends in your fights because you'll lose the trust of your spouse, and it can be difficult to win back.

5. Makes you want a different life

A person's online life may look starkly different than what it is in reality. Perfectly cleaned rooms and a fabulous dinner can lead to feelings of inadequacy. Resentment over lack of money or material items can make it difficult to work together in a relationship. We don't know the background behind the newest fashions, cars and homes others might have. Maybe they've worked hard for them, saving up to afford them after years. It could be that some of them buy things at a great cost to other parts of their life.

Solution

Take a moment and be grateful for what you do have. There are many that have next to nothing and others that have more than they need. That's when you take a look at your life and figure out if you're moving in the right direction. Are you accomplishing goals and becoming the person you want to become? Are you working with your spouse to create the life you want? When we put these thoughts into action, we start to realize how blessed we are and can eventually achieve them with our spouse, instead of moping in the corner.

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