There are many relationships in which the woman is ready to take the next step, but her partner gets cold feet. So instead of becoming another woman who ends up with a broken heart, I have put together a little list of things you can look out for as you assess whether your relationship is headed anywhere.

Here are five signs that your man is just not ready to get married:

1. He does not make time for you

When a man wants to, he will find a way to be with you. He will move around his schedule in order to spend time together. A man who is not interested will make excuses and say that he wants to hang out with you only when he is "not too tired."

2. It is difficult to trust him

A relationship gains strength from the moments that trust grows between two people. However, if your man does not talk or care about your concerns and joys, it may mean that this relationship is only on a physical level.

And if he lies to you about where he was or who he was talking with, take it as a warning sign that he is seeking an escape from the relationship.

3. He disappears in times of crisis

"I'm going through a difficult family situation; I'll be off for a few days." If you have ever received messages like this, be attentive. If a man is truly in love, his girlfriend will be one of the first people he wants to open up to and receive support from.

It is the difficult times that show how deep your love is. It is not easy or fun, but an open heart is essential in marriage. Be wary of a guy who does not show willingness to face challenges with you.

4. He does not include you in his plans for the future

You can see how "hooked" a man is by how he gets excited when planning a future with you.

If he's not taking into account your needs and wants in his future plans, it shows that he is not thinking about a longterm relationship, or is afraid of losing the freedom of single life.

5. He does not defend you from his family's criticism

Often a couple's family can be disapproving of their partners - and sometimes this disapproval can turn into nasty comments and offensive actions. If your man does not stand up for you in these moments, he most likely never will. It is a sign that he does not respect or love you the way a man should love a woman he intends to marry.

Courtship is designed so you can decide whether you really want to spend your whole life with a certain person. Watch for some behaviors that may become an even bigger issue after marriage.

No one is perfect, so, open your heart, talk to your man about the behaviors that concern you and share your expectations. But most importantly, be very honest with yourself. Do not make excuses to justify your man's behavior. Never settle for a guy who is not fully invested in your relationship.

This article is an adaptation and translation of the original article, "5 provas de que ele não é maduro bastante para casar."

It has been republished here with permission.

The post 5 signs your man is not ready to get married appeared first on FamilyToday.

Nails on a chalkboard - that's what it sounds like to a parent when we hear our kids whine. So why do kids whine? In most cases, it's because we let them.

Yes, kids whine sometimes because they're overtired or hungry. In these cases, it's best to comfort your child and tend to her most pressing needs. But otherwise? Walk away.

Why? When kids whine and we respond, we provide a payoff that makes the behavior continue. Kids whine not to be annoying or intentionally irritate us - they're often just looking for attention.

All humans are hard-wired with two basic emotional needs - attention and power. When kids aren't getting as much positive attention as they need, they will seek it out. And to kids, negative attention is better than no attention at all. So kids whine repeatedly in the hopes that eventually they'll get the positive attention they need. When they don't get that attention, the whining and attention-seeking behavior will intensify into behaviors that seek power.

Children only continue behaviors that get results. When kids whine and parents give in, kids realize that whining gets them what they want - the attention they crave and maybe even that candy bar in the grocery checkout line. If you don't address this behavior, it will continue well into our children's teenage years.

But giving in to demands - like one more television show or another scoop of ice cream - isn't the only way we enable how our kids whine. Just responding, even if it's to reprimand them, gives a child payoff. Picking up the child or responding with an annoyed remark ("Enough! Stop whining!"�) still gives the child attention - and now they know they can do this again and again to get the same result.

So how do we deal with how our kids whine now?

Remove payoff

The first step is to remove the payoff for whining. Times of whining, meltdowns and chaos are not places to have a level-headed conversation. So pick a calm moment when everyone's relaxed - maybe over lunch or a snack - to talk about whining. Talk about the difference between a whiny voice and a normal voice, and how a whiny voice hurts your ears. Let your child know how you feel when he whines and let him know that you won't respond when he whines - you'll just simply walk away. When he uses a normal voice, you'll be happy to talk to him.

Stay true to your word

The next time your kids whine, stay true to your word. Stay calm and walk away - even our negative non-verbal reaction to whining can be a payoff. When your child uses her normal voice, be sure to respond right away, calmly and pleasantly. The first few times, the whining may be more intense, as she tries to see how long it will take for Mom or Dad to give in. But after a few times of not finding a payoff for whining, she'll realize she's more likely to get positive attention by using her normal voice.

Give them positive attention

And because whining is an attention-seeking behavior, it can also signal to parents that our child - whether toddler or teen - is craving more one-on-one time with us. Think of it in a gardening sense - instead of fertilizing and watering our good plants with positive attention, we're feeding the weeds instead with negative attention. And the weeds - the whining - get worse.

The more we can fill our kids' "attention basket"� with positive experiences, the less they will seek out attention in negative ways. When kids receive the positive attention they need, behaviors like whining become less common. It's as simple as spending 10 to 15 minutes twice a day having fun with your kids individually. Do something they like to do, like reading, coloring or sports. This investment in one-on-one time will pay big rewards in good behavior.

The post Why kids whine and how to get them to stop appeared first on FamilyToday.