Rita Luciano – FamilyToday https://www.familytoday.com Here today, better tomorrow. Wed, 16 Aug 2017 15:12:00 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=5.8.3 https://wp-media.familytoday.com/2020/03/favicon.ico Rita Luciano – FamilyToday https://www.familytoday.com 32 32 13 reasons your sister is the very BEST gift your parents ever gave you https://www.familytoday.com/family/13-reasons-your-sister-is-the-very-best-gift-your-parents-ever-gave-you/ Wed, 16 Aug 2017 15:12:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/13-reasons-your-sister-is-the-very-best-gift-your-parents-ever-gave-you/ Can you think of any other reasons your sister is the absolute best?

The post 13 reasons your sister is the very BEST gift your parents ever gave you appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

My sister is my best friend and the only person who truly understands why I am the way I am. I dream of running away with her and driving off into the sunset for an adventure filled with laughter and good food with the most wonderful person I've ever met.

I am a single mother, and I cried the whole time I delivered my child. My sister was my rock. I would be lost in this world without her. We have had terrible fights but we work them out every time.

She saved me when I was struggling with my depression. I saved her when she was struggling with her issues. My sister really is the best gift my parents ever gave me. Wait, she's older - I'm the best gift my parents ever gave my sister.

Here are 13 reasons your sister is the best gift your parents ever gave you:

1. She will keep you honest

When we want to hide from the truth, sisters are there to point out the facts. Whether we want to hear it or not, sisters are always there to help you out and be completely honest.

2. Your sister will make you laugh

She'll make you laugh, and she'll laugh with you. Whether you're laughing hysterically because she fell down the stairs or she told you a hilarious joke, sisters have perfect comedic timing.

3. Sisters are a foundation

Like the structure of a building, she holds you together when you need it the most.

4. She thinks she's smarter than you

Although it's adorable, it's a common misconception for many siblings. Your sister's need to be smarter keeps you on your toes and constantly learning. Your sister is making you smarter.

Kochana moja Alupka ??❤#sispower #girlspower #lovemysisters @alasiemano

A post shared by Monika Kasprzyk (@kasprzykmonia) on

5. A sister will teach you how to fight

She will teach you to fist fight or how to debate to the death. There are few sisters that will just give up when they think they are right or something belongs to them. You will learn to defend yourself.

6. Sisters often become your second mother

Sisters always have your back and want to take care of you. Depending on the situation, this can be really great. You know she'll always be there, especially during the hard times. She might even offer a voice of reason or an over-protective opinion. You might not always appreciate it, but you will someday.

7. She is loyal

She's probably mean to you at times and you drive each other crazy, but if anyone tries to mess with you she will be there to defend you.

Nina ? #sorelle#family#lovemysister#happy#love#best#girls#hair#fun#selfie#instalike#picoftheday

A post shared by ? ♓ (@danibis87) on

8. A sister's kindness is a special thing

They will help you and hold you when you need them the most.

9. Sisters will teach you how to cope

You and your sister had so many times and situations where issues didn't work out the way you thought they should. You had to learn how to cope and deal with the results. These coping skills will serve you well in adulthood.

10. Your adult sister is generous

She will share with you and loves making you happy.

11. She protects you

Sisters will try to keep you out of trouble to the best of their abilities, and they will be there if (and when) you need them.

12. You always had a friend growing up

Sure, there were times you were enemies but you were friends more often than not.

13. She is your confidant

You can tell your sister anything and everything, and you know all of her secrets as well.

Your parents gave you a wonderful gift when they gave you a sister. If you haven't talked to your sister in a while, give her a call. Your sister survived the same childhood you did. She was there for you and you were there for her. Tag your sister in the comments and let her know she means the world to you.

The post 13 reasons your sister is the very BEST gift your parents ever gave you appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
The true and sad reasons why ‘bad men’ are so addictive to women and how to break away from them https://www.familytoday.com/family/the-true-and-sad-reasons-why-bad-men-are-so-addictive-to-women-and-how-to-break-away-from-them/ Fri, 21 Jul 2017 13:53:28 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/the-true-and-sad-reasons-why-bad-men-are-so-addictive-to-women-and-how-to-break-away-from-them/ Are women addicted to 'bad men,' or is there something else going on?

The post The true and sad reasons why ‘bad men’ are so addictive to women and how to break away from them appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

What is a bad man you ask? We're talking about men who destroy women's self-esteem or well-being, and emotionally abuse them. These bad men could be felons or gang members, but they're often just average men who treat women poorly and emotionally abuse them.

These men don't usually start bad. They might have a past of being nice - or pretending to be nice. Women fall for them, and they love them dearly. These women recognized the 'bad men' weren't perfect from the beginning, but they convinced themselves they could 'fix' these men and make them better.

The true and sad reality is that women in emotionally abusive relationships often suffer from low self-esteem and feel trapped in these relationships - they're not addicted. These women might not think they can do better, and they might not think they deserve better.

They may be afraid of being lonely. These men may have some sort of control over the women. Maybe these 'addicted' women don't know how a healthy relationship works.

If you are a woman who is with a bad man, chances are you have been with other bad men in the past. It's likely you'll be with this type of man again unless you break away from them and come to terms with your reality. Raise yourself up, stop listening to these 'bad men' and escape from the relationship.

Here's how you can break away:

1. Realize

Look around and realize you're in a very bad situation. You need to break away to keep your safety and sanity. It's never easy ending a relationship, especially one you're addicted to or trapped in. Be very serious and honest with yourself that this is the right choice.

2. Get help

Seek help from family and friends. Consider seeking professional help from a therapist to prepare yourself for independence. Having a good support system is crucial to recovery.

3. Plan

Make a plan and stick to it. Don't make sudden decisions or act as a result of emotions. You know what the man you're with is like. Consider what type of circumstance would be safest to leave him, and go with that plan. Don't put yourself in physical or emotional danger.

4. Know what to look for

When you start looking to date again, remember the signs of an emotionally abusive person. Don't get involved with anyone who makes you feel bad about yourself and avoid dating anyone with the same traits as the 'bad man' you were with before. Remember - you can't fix him. Look for a kind, stable person who accepts you as you are.

There are also scenarios where men are addicted to 'bad women' for the same reasons. It's important for these men to protect themselves and follow the same tips for breaking away and finding a healthy relationship.

The post The true and sad reasons why ‘bad men’ are so addictive to women and how to break away from them appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
5 reasons women envy the beauty of other women and 5 horrible consequences https://www.familytoday.com/family/5-reasons-women-envy-the-beauty-of-other-women-and-5-horrible-consequences/ Fri, 21 Jul 2017 10:35:23 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/5-reasons-women-envy-the-beauty-of-other-women-and-5-horrible-consequences/ Have you ever seen a beautiful woman and envied her? Here are 5 reasons beauty is envied and the horrible…

The post 5 reasons women envy the beauty of other women and 5 horrible consequences appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

Psychology Today states, "The pain of envy is not caused by the desire for the advantages of others per se, but by the feeling of inferiority and frustration occasioned by their lack in ourselves."

Here are five things we envy about beautiful women:

  1. We envy the attention men give to beautiful women. There are few beauties that go unnoticed by men. Whether it be a quick glance or a hard stare, men admire them.

  2. Women envy her beauty because they want her life. Her beauty makes them feel insignificant and insecure.

  3. It's easy to envy a beauty's confidence. She appears calm, collected and confident as she strolls through the grocery store.

  4. Many women envy her effortless social life. Anyone would be hard pressed to turn these lovely women down.

  5. Beautiful women get what they want, and we envy that fact. She knows how to use her beauty to her advantage.

To envy something or someone only causes you pain. Here are five horrible consequences that come with envy:

  1. Envy poisons the mind. These women give a false perception of reality. A woman who appears beautiful and confident has insecurities too. They are human too, and they have the same feelings as anyone else.
  1. Envy causes unreasonable ambition that is dangerous for your body and mind. Ambition is great, but unreasonable ambition is dangerous. Set reasonable goals that are within you physical abilities. Make sure you consult a physician for the best plan to meet your goals.

  2. Envy makes it difficult to be satisfied with yourself. Looking at someone else's beauty may cause a negative self-image. Be your own lovely self! Hold up your head, because you are beautiful and loved. Open your eyes and see it for yourself.

  3. Envy creates anger in the heart. It's easy to rage over the concept of "why them, and not me." This interpretation is damaging to your psyche. Beautiful women are normal, and they have insecurities too. It's unrealistic to feel anger or resentment. See yourself as perfect in your own right and compare yourself to no one.

  4. Envy will lead you away from your personal destiny. Envy is destructive and powerful. It can blind you if you allow it. Keep your feet on the ground and your focus on yourself. Do not envy anyone for any reason; it will lead you down a blind path.

Being envious is extremely damaging, and it is not worth the heartache and pain. Instead of envying her beauty, admire her and remember that she is not perfect - no one is. You are amazing, you are loved and you are your own definition of beautiful.

The post 5 reasons women envy the beauty of other women and 5 horrible consequences appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
3 steps to get up and gather the pieces of your broken heart once someone has hurt you badly https://www.familytoday.com/relationships/3-steps-to-get-up-and-gather-the-pieces-of-your-broken-heart-once-someone-has-hurt-you-badly/ Thu, 20 Jul 2017 12:01:21 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/3-steps-to-get-up-and-gather-the-pieces-of-your-broken-heart-once-someone-has-hurt-you-badly/ Follow these 3 steps to recover from a broken heart.

The post 3 steps to get up and gather the pieces of your broken heart once someone has hurt you badly appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

Recovering from a devastating broken heart is easier said than done. The pain that comes from it is nearly unbearable and absolutely vile. But at some point, most of us will have times when we have to stitch our heart back together after it's ripped apart by someone we love.

Here are three steps to gather up the pieces of your broken heart and start your healing process:

1. Accept help from the people around you

People in your life are reaching out to you. They love you, and they know you're in pain. Take their hands and accept their support. Think of this as heart surgery and they're the surgeons. You can't operate on yourself. Allow people into your life, go out with your friends, visit your parents, answer when friends call and get off the internet - no matter how hard it is.

2. Make schedules and set goals

Never underestimate the power of a list. When you have a broken heart, you keep searching to fix the past or seek normalcy. You need to understand that this is a paradigm shift in your life, and nothing will be the same as it was before.

You have just experienced a life changing event. You were in love, and that person told you not to love them anymore. This could be the most confusing and merciless task of your life. The pain you feel is everywhere. Set small daily goals to get through this heartbreak. Set schedules to stay focused. Keep your head up, breathe deep and don't stop moving.

3. Focus and be mindful

Do NOT dwell on the past. You will freeze and relive your pain. Be in the present. If you start to regress or dwell on the past, pay attention to what you're doing. Listen to the sounds around you. Focus or your breathing. Look at your hands and think about what they're doing right this second. Force yourself out of your head and focus on the "here and now."

Recovering from a broken heart is not an easy task, but you will recover and you will move on. In fact, there will be a day when you've completely forgotten about the whole thing (I know from experience). But, it takes time to get there. It's a harsh journey and requires a lot of patience, but you can do it.

Thinking forward

If someone in your life brings up the person who shattered your heart, feel comfortable enough to say, "I prefer not to talk about that person, can we please change the subject." If they persist, walk just walk away. You're an adult, and you don't have to engage in uncomfortable situations that cause you pain.

The post 3 steps to get up and gather the pieces of your broken heart once someone has hurt you badly appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
5 toxic men you need to remove from your life https://www.familytoday.com/relationships/5-toxic-men-you-need-to-remove-from-your-life/ Fri, 26 May 2017 06:31:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/5-toxic-men-you-need-to-remove-from-your-life/ Are these men tearing the joy out of your life?

The post 5 toxic men you need to remove from your life appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

Sometimes the fear of being alone allows some of us (myself included) to look beyond a man's shortcomings and personality flaws. However, often those flaws are seriously toxic behaviors that are damaging to your mental and physical wellbeing. It's not worth keeping these toxic men around - they are destructive and unable to change.

Here is a list of five toxic men you need to remove from your life:

1. The addict

This man could be addicted to drugs, alcohol, pornography or something else. But no matter the addiction, it's best to abandon the hope that you can fix him or that he will change for you. The reality of this boyfriend is that he can only help himself. You can stay a strong friend for them if you wish but do not let him rob you of an amazing future. Just walk away. It's not selfish, it's just more important that you focus on keeping yourself happy and available for a healthy relationship.

2. The emotional vampire

This toxic man will slowly feed off your happiness and possibly your sanity. He is never satisfied with your efforts and wants you all to himself. You will be disconnected from your friends and family if you stay with this kind of man. He wants you to have on blinders and see only him, all of the time. Relationships with him are manipulative and frustrating. At times, his constant calls, texts, messages and location check-ins are so overwhelming you may feel like you're losing part of your own identity.

Pull a disappearing act on this toxic man because this is a terrible relationship that will suck the joy out of your soul.

3. The bully

The bully is a toxic man who thinks he can control you because he's a big man who has all figured out. He will tell you what to do, where to go and when to do it. It's not uncommon for a bully to threaten you, restrain you, hide car keys and attempt to manipulate your freedom.

Don't stay in his trap. Say no and get out of there, fast.

4. The grown-up boy

Sadly there are many adult men who are actually just grown-up boys. They may not be easy to spot right away; you may even be stuck with one and are just realizing it now. My advice is to get out now. The grown-up boy has video games on his mind, wants you to be his parent (instead of a partner) and offers little to nothing to the relationship. You may be second or third to his friends and partying. His dismal goals and poor career choice should be enough encouragement for you to find a real man.

5. The abuser

The toxic man is the most dangerous and deadliest. He may be a physical or psychological abuser. Regardless, he is harming you.

Remove him from your life like cancer. Most abusers will not go easily or willingly, but it's vital to plan your get away. You may have to start at the court house with a restraining order and call the police to be there while you pack up your things. He will never change his unstable behaviors, so run from him like the house is on fire.

If you are in this kind of situation, please get help by contacting the National Domestic Violence Hotline online or by calling at 1−800−799−7233.

Friends, remove these toxic men if your life as quickly as possible. Be strong, be brave and don't hold back. There a too many kind-hearted and amazing men out there that who would be perfect for you.

The post 5 toxic men you need to remove from your life appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
Combating automatic negative thoughts https://www.familytoday.com/self-care/combating-automatic-negative-thoughts/ Fri, 19 Aug 2016 10:11:40 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/combating-automatic-negative-thoughts/ Do you have Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs)? Do you destroy yourself and talk to yourself in a hateful tone? Time…

The post Combating automatic negative thoughts appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

Do you have Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs) like "I hate myself, I'm fat, I can't do this, I'm a failure, or I'm worthless?" This article will help you get rid of those ANTs with positive responses and realistic goals.

First, use these tips to identify your ANTs:

  1. Pay attention to your ANTs. You will start to see a pattern of harsh things you say to yourself.

  2. Write them down and list your ANTs. You need to have a plan to know what your positive responses need to be.

  3. Notice times and situations when you're having ANTs. Are you hating yourself when you get ready for work? Do you insult yourself at the gym? Do you have negative self-talk when driving in your car?
    Whenever you are having ANTs make mental note.

  4. Is a certain person causing ANTs to rise in your mind that you feel you can't control?

It's time to terminate those Automatic Negative Thoughts. Arm yourself with positive responses to crush all of your ANTs. Destroy the negative voice in your head to replace it with Positive Automatic Thoughts. This will bring calm and happiness to your inner wellbeing.

Below is a list of example ANTs and how you can combat these thoughts:

1. ANT: "I hate myself!"

Response: "I don't hate myself, I don't like the way I'm feeling right now." "I love myself, I just made a mistake."

Goal: Stop self-hate, acknowledge your anxiety and deal with the issues without hurting your inner self.

2. ANT: "I'm fat and ugly!"

Response: "I may be different but that's ok, the world needs variety, and that's me." "I'm not fat and ugly, I'm beautifully made." "I will not shame myself, head up, life is good."

Goal: It's ok not to be perfect, accept who you are. Look at the people who love you, they accept you and love you. See your beauty! Don't fall for others idea of beauty.

3. ANT: "I don't fit in!" "They don't like me!" "I hate being here and I want to go home."

Response: "I was invited to be here and these are my friends; I'm just having anxiety." "I may not know these people; I'm having social anxiety, these people are not thinking about me so relax." "I'm out on the town, and these people are entertaining me."

Goal: Get out of your head and enjoy the environment. Realize you're nervous and having social anxiety. Have a plan before you go. Focus on friends. Make mini goals, i.e. talk to a new person, dance for 2 minutes or use 1 pick-up line.

4. ANT: "I want to disappear."

Response: "I want to live!" "I am being hurt by this situation and my life is too beautiful to end now." "This too will pass and I can overcome this issue."

Goal: Save yourself. These thought are dangerous. Stop these thoughts with positive thoughts. You may be in a tough spot now, but reach out, as there are so many people trying (and want) to help you. This is a thought that needs more support- be brave to save yourself.

When in doubt, just tell the ANT to, "Shut up!"

Don't let the Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs) take over. Be prepared with a decisive arsenal to enjoy Positive Automatic Thoughts. Write down your positive words and hang them everywhere. It will help you remember how to stop the ANTs, overcome the negative inner dialogue and stop negative self-talk.

For more support there's help. Reach out to the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance. It's a place to start if you need more help saving and taking care of yourself.

The post Combating automatic negative thoughts appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>