When I submitted my last assignment for my last semester of school, I breathed a sigh of relief and immediately started thinking about all of the fun things I wanted to do with my nights. Finally, my nights wouldn't be consumed by classes, internship hours and homework. I sat down with Joe on Sunday for our family meeting, eager to plan some fun things and down time together.

Our conversation during that family meeting went a little like this:

Me: "What do you have going this week?"

Joe: "I have this on Monday night, that on Tuesday night and this other thing on Wednesday night."

Me: "So we can hang out on Thursday night?"

Joe: "Probably. I might have something that shifts into Thursday night, though."

Me: "Do you even want to hang out with me?!?" (Joking, of course.)

I don't know why I thought that time was magically going to appear after I graduated, but apparently I did. I'd forgotten all about lawn care season and how much Joe is usually gone taking care of clients and building his business. He also has church commitments that take up at least one night a week. After this season dies down, we have other things that we're planning for and then the holidays hit. There's always something around the next corner that takes up time.Every season of life is different, and the demands on our time shift as well, but there's consistency in the fact that it never feels like there is enough time in our days to do what we want.

I was disappointed in myself that last semester because I did a lot more taking than giving in our relationship. I didn't always make Joe a priority, even though I thought about it often. He was the greatest support to me in my final semester of school, especially as my carefully laid plans fell apart and. Now that Joe is in a busy season of his life, I know that I need to step up to the plate and support him the way that he supported me!

As I put together my schedule each week, I make sure to include time that I can spend with Joe. Over the next five months, which I'm labeling as "the next season of our lives," I have specific ideas of things I know will help us make time for our marriage. Planned, weekly date nights are at the top of that list, because it is guaranteed quality time. Other things on the list include night time walks with the family, dinner from the grill every couple of weeks, Friday lunch dates at home while our son naps, etc. I want to make the most of the time that we have to spend together, even though it's not abundant.

Here are three tips to make more time for your marriage right now:

Don't use the gaps to make time for your spouse!

Obviously, it's great to spend extra free time together, but your marriage and your spouse should be a priority first! Have you ever seen the object lesson using a jar, rocks and sand that illustrates priorities in life? If you put the sand (unimportant things) in first, there's no room for the rocks (important things). But if you add the big rocks, then the pebbles and the sand, you'll be able to fit everything into your schedule. Identify the rocks, pebbles and sand in your life. When I sit down to fill out my calendar, I schedule the rocks first (date night, weekly rituals, family time, etc.) and then I fill-in some of the gaps with my pebbles. Any leftover time each day is spent taking care of the sand in my life.

Knowing your schedule makes all the difference

When you look at your schedule every week/month/year, what are the non-negotiable things that you put on the calendar first? Do you ever schedule time for your marriage as a must-do in your life? If you're determined to make your marriage a priority, you should, and you should make that time non-negotiable the same way work, class, and other things are set commitments that can't be moved.

Don't commit to more than you can handle

I would never suggest that anyone attempt to do everything I did my last semester of school. It was a really bad idea. It was not my plan, at all, and Joe agreed to journey through it with me. The things that I had to commit to weren't bad, but all of my commitments combined took up a lot more of my time than they should have. School, work, church service, none of it is bad until it doesn't leave time for your priorities. If someone asks me to do something and that thing falls into my work hours, it's easy to say no. If I have made plans with family for that time, it's easy to say no. If you've scheduled date night or time with your spouse, do you say no to things that conflict with those plans?

No matter your stage in life, there will always be something keeping you from spending every minute of every day together. Some stages may allow for more free time than others, but there will always be other responsibilities that need to be taken care of. Don't let your commitments take up all of your time. I know that Joe and I survived this last season of life because we were determined to make our relationship a priority and knew that no matter what life was sending our way, our ultimate goal is to have a strong marriage and family. Make time for your marriage, because if you don't, you will begin to drift apart and one day you might wake up to find that you are roommates instead of lovers. Make your marriage a priority and you will have a confidant, partner and best friend to make it through every stage of life with.

This article originally appeared on Amberly Lambertsen's blog, APrioritizedMarriage.com. It has been republished here with permission.

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When you live with and interact with someone on a daily basis, it's easy to begin to take the things that they do for granted. If your husband is like mine, he does a lot every day that helps you and the household. Does he know that you recognize and are grateful for everything he does? It's easy to remember to thank someone for something big and out of the ordinary, but the little things that are routine are just as important! Try doing one or all of these four things to help your husband know that he is appreciated for what he does:

1. Focus on the things he does rather than the things he doesn't do

A lot of wives have what we like to refer to as the "honey-do" list. The projects on that list may sit there for months, untouched. It can be frustrating when the things that you want done don't seem to matter to your husband. It can be easy to look at all of those tasks and remind him constantly that they are there, waiting for him to complete.

Instead of focusing on the things that you feel your husband should be doing and isn't, start to look at the things that he is doing. Maybe a yard project that he did for himself could benefit you in some way, let him know that you are grateful he did it. By focusing on the things that he is accomplishing and how they are benefitting you, not only will your attitude and viewpoint change, but your appreciation may make him more willing to complete the things on your list. People respond to positive feedback, so getting rid of the constant reminders and shifting to thanking your husband instead will benefit both of you.

2. Do something nice in return

The little things that are routine for your husband that he does are great things to take over for him for a week. If you make dinner and he cleans up, tell him to sit and relax or enjoy time with the kids while you take care of clean up for the night. Maybe you know that he's been meaning to mow the lawn but just hasn't had time. Fit some time into your day and take care of that for him.

If you're really ambitious, write him a little note at the beginning of the week letting him know how grateful you are for all that he does and let him know that he is free of all "chores" for the week or a certain number of days. Consider listing everything that you plan to take care of for him so that there isn't any confusion.

3. Surprise him with something out of the ordinary

Big surprises are perfect for when your husband has helped you with something big. For example, my husband has been a huge support to me as I've been going to school and has taken on a lot of extra household and parenting responsibilities so that I have been able to complete my degree. Plan a date night out that involves everything that he loves to do: book a golf game or fun night away for him and some of his guy friends, or get something for him that he's had his eye on for a while.

Find something that you know he would love to receive or do, and let him know that it is your way of thanking him for everything he has done for you.

4. Simply thank him and let him know that he's appreciated

It may sound easy, but how often do you say "thank you" when your husband does something? Even those little day-to-day tasks that have become part of his routine should be appreciated. Things like going to work, taking out the trash, cleaning up dinner, or playing with the kids while you take a minute to get something done are all things that he does that help you out. Find one little thing each day that you can thank him for- whether it's thanking him for working hard so that you can stay home with the kids or thanking him for the hug and kiss he gives you daily that mean so much to you. Those words, when said sincerely, will make your husband's day!

Showing appreciation for your husband and everything that he does will benefit both of you individually and as a couple. You will be more aware of the contributions that he is making to the household, and he will be more willing and eager to help you out, no matter what you are asking him to do.

Your appreciation may cause him to look for ways to show similar gratitude for you. Your marriage will be stronger because you are interacting in a positive way and seeking to appreciate each other, rather than looking for things you wish the other person would do differently.

Don't wait- find ways to appreciate your husband today!

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Some couples don't spend a lot of time apart while others spend weeks, months or even years separated for one reason or another. No matter how long you spend apart, without your spouse around, you can start to get bored and feel really lonely.

The next time you find yourself in this predicament, try one of these ten boredom busters:

1. Plan a girls/guys night

You may spend a lot of time with your very best friend, but you have other friends in your life as well. When you know your spouse will be gone, plan to spend some time with them. You could host a party and watch your favorite chick flick or action movie.

You could also plan an afternoon or evening out on the town at your favorite restaurant, bowling alley or shopping center.

2. Do something for yourself

Time alone means you can focus on yourself. Watch your favorite movie, eat your favorite foods, and do something that will benefit only you. Take a long bath, get a pedicure, work on a personal project, etc.

Do something that makes you happy!

3. Put together a surprise for your spouse

Does your spouse have something that they've wanted to have done for a while? Maybe there's a project around the house or the yard that they've been talking about. While your spouse isn't around, get the project done! Just make sure you plan in advance if it's something that requires help from other people.

4. Spend time on your personal hobbies

Do you have a hobby that you've been neglecting since you got married and started spending more of your time working on your marriage? Maybe you've neglected it completely or don't work on as often as you'd like. Spend the extra time that you have now that your spouse is away working on that hobby.

5. Pursue a new hobby

Is there something that you've always thought would be fun to try? Maybe you want to learn to play an instrument or become really good at a certain sport. Or maybe you'd love to bake or learn to cook a specific type of food. Depending on how much time you have, and what your budget will allow, this is the perfect time to get started.

6. Spend a night doing the things your spouse doesn't enjoy

While you probably have a lot in common with your spouse, there are still a lot of things that they enjoy that you might not and vice versa. While your spouse is out of town, enjoy those things that you don't usually get to do very often when they are around. Watch the movies that they don't enjoy, eat the food that they don't lov,e and blast the music that isn't their favorite to listen to.

7. Work a few extra hours

It is ok to want to make some extra money every once and a while. When your spouse is around, it's important to maintain a healthy work/life balance. Your marriage relationship should always be a priority and it shouldn't take the backseat to work, although providing for your family is definitely important. While your spouse is away, you won't have to feel guilty if you work late to get ahead on some projects.

8. Plan a date night for when they get home

After any amount of time apart, you'll most likely want to spend time together as soon as your spouse gets home. The time that you have to yourself is perfect for researching and planning a fun date night. The date doesn't have to be extravagant, but it should give you an opportunity to spend good, quality time together.

9. Do something fun with your kids

A lot of people don't have extra time to spend on themselves while their spouse is out of town because they still have their kids to take care of. That type of responsibility can be stressful. Get out with your kids and do something fun, for your own sanity as much as their enjoyment. Go to the zoo, have a playdate with other friends, have a picnic and play at the local park, or take them to get ice cream for dinner.

10. Let your spouse know that you're thinking about them

No matter what kind of contact you have while your spouse is away, don't forget to let them know that you are missing them! If you know that you won't have contact with them, hide notes in their luggage or send little gifts for them to open at certain points in their trip. If you do have a way to communicate, send texts throughout their trip and make time to talk on the phone or Facetime each day.

Being away from your spouse is never fun, no matter how short of a trip, or how often you've done it. Letting yourself have a pity party and feel lonely every night will only make your time apart harder to handle. Keeping yourself busy may not make you miss each other less, but it might help the time pass more quickly.

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For the past year, I've focused my blog content on making marriage a priority throughout every stage of life. It's a topic that I'm extremely passionate about and I've been happy to find that most other couples feel that it's important as well! If you ever read my blog and think, 'Amberly, I don't have time in my current stage of life to put my marriage first!', there are a few things that I think you should know.

Prioritizing your marriage doesn't mean: That you have to put all of your energy into your marriage, every hour of every day. That you can't have a life or spend time with friends outside your marriage. Or that there aren't other things in your life that are a priority or need to come first sometimes.

Prioritizing your marriage does mean: That you find ways to connect with your spouse on a daily basis. That you schedule time on a regular basis to spend time together just the two of you. That you do little things to show your spouse that you're thinking about them (think love languages). That you set goals to make your marriage better, take time to think about your spouse often and consider them when making big decisions.

Four reasons you need to make your marriage a priority

1. It lets them know that they are important to you and that you value your relationship with them.__

You can say "I love you" all day long, but if your actions don't match what you are saying, your words won't have much meaning. When you were dating, how often was your relationship on your mind? If you thought about your significant other as much now as you did then, you would be more aware of the little things that you could do or say throughout the day to let them know that you care about them.

2. Your marriage can't grow unless you continually work on it

If you want to grow and progress in any area of your life, you have to focus and put a lot of time and energy into it. If you want to get better at playing a musical instrument, you have to practice daily and you continue practicing even after you think you've mastered it, because there is always room for improvement and if you stop playing, you'll lose the talent that you have. The same should be true for your marriage. Your relationship doesn't reach perfection the minute you tie the knot. If you want to maintain the close friendship and love that you have with each other, you have to make time for it every day, no matter how busy your schedule is.

3. You are setting an example of what a healthy marriage looks like for your children, grandchildren and those around you.

Parenthood is the most common stage in life when couples don't feel like they are able to put their marriage first. Even though it might be the most challenging stage to do so, I feel like it might be the stage when making time for your spouse is the most important. Not only for the sake of your marriage, but for your children's sake as well. Your kids will notice when you go out on date nights, spend time talking and laughing together, and when you put each other first.

4. If you don't make your marriage a priority, you'll grow apart instead of growing together.

The number of gray divorces is rising. Gray divorce is when a couple divorces after the age of 50. At the top of the list for reasons why a gray divorce may occur are; growing old together can create distance, living together without kids, drifting apart, lack of emotional connection with spouse and loss of respect for each other. I feel strongly that if you make your spouse a priority and work together to keep your relationship strong through every stage of life, the risk of gray divorce in your marriage will drop significantly.

Throughout the almost five years of our marriage, there have been a lot of different times when it has been easy to put other things ahead of my marriage. No matter what stage of life you are in, there will always be something or someone fighting for your attention. Do what you can, and don't let the idea of prioritizing your marriage overwhelm you! If you make an effort every day to focus on your marriage, your relationship will be stronger.

What will you do this week to make sure your spouse knows that they are a priority in your life? What goals can you set this year to make your marriage more of a priority?

Editor's note: This article was originally published on A Prioritized Marriage. It has been republished here with permission.

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We've all been there, or will be there, at some point in time; anxious to find true love and start a life together. It doesn't matter how old you are, or how long you've been playing the dating game. When you feel like you are ready to settle down, nothing is more frustrating than feeling like you'll never find "the one".

We'll all find our special someone in time, but there are things that you do that could be holding you back from finding the one.

Are you doing any of these 9 things?

1. You don't love yourself

Before you can fully love another person, and before someone else can fully love you, you must first love yourself.

Focus on developing your talents, turn your weaknesses into strengths, and make a list of all of your best qualities. Write an affirmation statement for yourself and put it somewhere that you will see it daily.

2. You don't go on dates

Hanging out with groups of people, or hanging out one on one, can be less intimidating and feel less committed than going on a date, but it doesn't get you any closer to finding "the one."

Accept invitations to go out on dates, ask someone out on a date, or turn your usual hangouts into something more formal. Planned, paid for and paired off- that's what makes a date (although they all don't have to cost money).

3. Your expectations are too high

Do you have a list of traits that you are looking for in your future spouse?

There's nothing wrong with having expectations, but you'll have a hard time finding that perfect person if your list is too specific. No individual is perfect, and the one who is perfect for you might not be anything like you imagined. They will have qualities that you never knew you needed. Decide what your non-negotiable items are and be flexible with the rest.

4. You are too comfortable with your routine

You may want to find your forever significant other, but you must also be willing to change your routines in order to make your relationship work.

Being single and dating gives you a lot of freedom and independence to make decisions totally on your own. Once you are in a long-term, committed relationship, you are part of a team. Every decision you make after that point affects more than just you. While you can still have your freedom and independence, it won't be the same as when you were on your own. If you aren't able to make adjustments to your norm, settling down will be more difficult to do.

5. You aren't doing things for yourself

Don't plan your life around the possibility that you might meet your match tomorrow, next week, in two months or next year. Make plans, set goals, and live your dreams!

Plan a cruise with your closest friends for a year from now, go back to school for a second degree, or buy your first home. Delaying your own happiness and putting off the things that you really want to do in hopes that this week will be your week, or this year will be your year, will only make you more miserable and desperate to find "the one."

6. You're trying too hard

If finding that special someone is the only thing you can think about, or if you make every decision with that goal in mind, you're trying too hard. Relax, have some fun, and don't let the stress of being single get you down.

The grass is always greener on the other side, so instead of feeling like being married would be a lot more fulfilling than your life right now, find the good in being single, and enjoy every moment of it.

Being married is great, but once you're there, there will be things that you might be disappointed you didn't take the chance to do while you could.

7. You don't know who you are

In the movie, "Runaway Bride," Julia Roberts' character changes her preferences depending on who she is dating or engaged to at the time. One of the scenes at the climax of the storyline shows her taste testing eggs, cooked in every way possible, to figure out which one she really prefers.

Are your favorites really your favorites, or do they change depending on who you're with?

Do everything you can to find out who you really are and stay true to that person, no matter who you are with.

8. You aren't willing to take risks

Get out of your comfort zone, meet new people, go on that blind date, or try a new dating website.

Be open to new things, new people, and new places. You might not find "the one" with every risk you take, but you'll grow as an individual and learn new things about yourself!

9. You hold people at arm's length

If you have a hard time being vulnerable with people or aren't able to trust someone new, you will never be able to achieve that level of emotional intimacy that a long-term relationship needs. Take risks, trust people after you've had the chance to get to know them, and let them get to know a deeper side of you.

Don't give up hope that you'll ever find "the one"! For now, be the best version of yourself that you can be, and make a lot of memories. You'll always be glad that you enjoyed every moment of life, instead of waiting for someone special to walk into your life.

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Do you feel like your spouse is always on his or her phone, computer, tablet or other gadget? In an age when technology has become a part of everyday life, and seems almost impossible to avoid, checking phone notifications has become second nature. The amount of time that you choose to spend with your technological devices and on social media has a direct effect on other areas of your life, including your marriage.

When it feels like your spouse is spending more time with his or her phone and friends on social media than with you, you might start to feel lonely and frustrated. Social media use doesn't have to come between you and your spouse — and you shouldn't let it. If feeling shut out by Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. is something that you can relate to, keep these three things in mind.

Don't criticize

John Gottman's research has been shown to accurately predict early divorce in couples. The first horseman in Gottman's Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is criticism. Criticism is defined as judgment or expressing disapproval based on a person's actions that you perceive as faults or mistakes. Criticism can lead to defensiveness, which leads to arguments and hard feelings.

So be careful about how you approach the subject of your partner's social media use.

Avoid saying things like, "You never pay attention to me anymore! All you care about is what's going on on Facebook!" or "Which do you love more, me or social media? Because your Twitter followers seem more important than our relationship." Statements like these may cause your spouse to get defensive and can lead to hurt feelings and more conflict in your marriage.

Do have a conversation about it

Avoiding criticism doesn't mean that you should avoid all conversation about your spouse's social media use. Chances are, your spouse might not realize that his or her media use is being perceived as a problem. To you, it might seem like your spouse checks social media every second of every day. But to him, it could seem like he is simply catching up on the news or other life events for the first time that day, due to a busy work schedule, school or home life.

When you're ready to discuss your spouse's social media habits with him or her, use "I" statements. You might say something like, "I was hoping that we could put our phones away during dinner and talk tonight." or "I thought we'd planned on spending quality time together tonight so I was hurt when you spent most of the night on your phone. Can we try this again tomorrow and turn both of our phones off?" Your spouse will be more open to what you have to say, and the "I" statements will help her see things from your perspective.

Do set boundaries

Once the discussion has been started, you are both in the perfect position to set boundaries for future social media use. Boundaries protect relationships from things that have the potential to cause conflict or tear the relationship apart. Setting boundaries for media use in your marriage will ensure that you are both on the same page with your expectations. Knowing what those expectations are will prevent situations in the future that lead to heated conversations and disappointment.

When setting boundaries, think of times in the past when social media has gotten in the way of your relationship growth, interrupted quality time, or caused arguments between the two of you. You might consider the following:

• All meals together will take place unplugged from technology.

• Phones will be put on silent and remain out of sight during planned quality time.

• No technology allowed in the bedroom after a certain hour.

• During conversations, all attention will be focused on the speaker and phones must remain put away.

Like anything else in your marriage that might be problematic, excessive social media use should be addressed. If you don't say something, your spouse might never realize that it is a problem or change his or her habits. Social media doesn't have to be an obstacle in your relationship, even in such a technology-saturated world. Start the discussion with your spouse today; your marriage will thank you.

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