Gina Holt – FamilyToday https://www.familytoday.com Here today, better tomorrow. Tue, 30 May 2017 06:31:00 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=5.8.3 https://wp-media.familytoday.com/2020/03/favicon.ico Gina Holt – FamilyToday https://www.familytoday.com 32 32 4 conversations you should never have with your friends if you’re married https://www.familytoday.com/relationships/4-conversations-you-should-never-have-with-your-friends-if-youre-married/ Tue, 30 May 2017 06:31:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/4-conversations-you-should-never-have-with-your-friends-if-youre-married/ Some things just shouldn't be discussed with your friends.

The post 4 conversations you should never have with your friends if you’re married appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

When you're at lunch with friends or on a double date, it's important to know you can trust your spouse to not embarrass you by blurting out personal information.

But whether you are out with friends together or separately, there are some conversation topics that should be kept between you and your spouse.

Here are a few of them:

1. Intimacy issues

What does or doesn't happen in your bedroom is no one else's business. Intimacy means confidence. No one except the two of you should know details like the frequency of your lovemaking or what you wear to bed. If you have concerns about intimacy issues, the two of you can discuss them with a professional or marriage counselor - but not with your friends.

2. Family planning

How many children you want and when you want them is a personal decision between you, your spouse and God.

It's also no one's business if you are using birth control, and what kind.

These decisions and conversations are important ones in your life, and don't need to be influenced by the judgments and opinions of others.

3. Finances

Aside from your accountant and your boss, other people don't need to know how much money you make.

And your budget as a couple is just that - yours.

It's nobody's business how much you save per month for Christmas or vacations, or how much you put away for retirement, investments or a rainy day.

They don't need to know how much you have in the bank, how much your house payment is or how expensive your new car was.

And you shouldn't be asking to know these things about other people, either. It is their business.

4. Children

You're likely proud of your children and are happy to share their successes and triumphs. That is good to an extent, but some things regarding your children shouldn't be shared.

Talking to friends about how often your child wets the bed, or how they struggle in school, for example, will embarrass them, and likely stop them from trusting you enough to confide in you in the future.

If you want your children to trust you, do not disclose things to your friends that would in any way embarrass, hurt or show disrespect to your child. Your children, just like your spouse, are entitled to that trust from you.

When you do speak of your children, be kind. Remember that this is your child you are talking about. Don't complain or roll your eyes or call them names.

The reason for keeping these things between you and your spouse is to build trust, and to foster a deeper and more satisfying connection with each other.

The post 4 conversations you should never have with your friends if you’re married appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
13 cherished moments only full-time moms will experience https://www.familytoday.com/family/13-cherished-moments-only-full-time-moms-will-experience/ Thu, 06 Apr 2017 06:31:04 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/13-cherished-moments-only-full-time-moms-will-experience/ Women who are full-time moms experience the best of womanhood, for 'the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.'

The post 13 cherished moments only full-time moms will experience appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

There are hundreds of precious experiences that only mothers get the chance to experience. How can a mother count all the little smiles her children give or even all the funny and frustrating messes that happen day-to-day? It's part of the calling.

But it's a little different for stay-at-home moms - these mothers get the chance to see a different facet of parenting. They get to see the realization in their child's eyes when they figure out something they haven't been able to do before, over and over again. They get to see the miniscule changes that take place in their child from hour to hour, day-to-day.

These 13 moments are tiny things only stay-at-home-moms experience:

  1. Rocking a sick child all night long without the worry of having to go into the office the next day. You'll still be exhausted, but you'll be home to nurse that little boy or girl back to health - it's such a satisfying feeling.

  2. Spending long hours in the library choosing books with your children and reading them all in one sitting when you get home.

  3. Knowing your home is where your most important work is done and treating it with the respect it deserves.

  4. Never having to worry about missing the important milestones of your children because you're always where the action is.

  5. Waking up and deciding it's a good day to take your little ones to the zoo, and then actually going.

  6. The beautiful simplicity of a peanut butter and jam sandwich with a glass of milk for lunch.

  7. The sweaty little bodies running in from the summer sandbox, begging you to join them to make mud pies.

  8. Reading your child's favorite book over and over and over again, because you have the time.

  9. The freedom of saying 'no' to the dishes and 'yes' to one more game of Old Maid.

  10. Being home when the school calls to tell you your child has just thrown up and being the one to rescue her.

  11. Being home whenever your children are, giving them more chances to tell you what's happening their world.

  12. The tired heaviness that takes place around your child's nap time and you realize you can take a nap, too.

  13. The sweetness of having a baby fall asleep in your arms and knowing you can choose to just let them be.

The day-to-day sameness of motherhood sometimes can be the biggest challenge and that's why these precious moments are so very dear - because many of them won't happen again in the exact same way.

These little things are wonderful and fleeting. So read that book for the fifth time, cuddle your children when they're sick and make waffles for dinner, for one day they'll be all grown up. Once they do grow up, you'll be able to have new adventures but these moments when they are young only come around once.


Sign up here for our weekly FamilyShare email and get more of the stories you love.

The post 13 cherished moments only full-time moms will experience appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
3 gestures of a husband who will love you forever https://www.familytoday.com/relationships/3-gestures-of-a-husband-who-will-love-you-forever/ Fri, 31 Mar 2017 06:31:03 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/3-gestures-of-a-husband-who-will-love-you-forever/ Surprise! It's not about roses or jewelry or hot dates or cruises. Lasting love is deeper than that.

The post 3 gestures of a husband who will love you forever appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

You know your husband loves you now, but is this a man who will love you forever? After the kids have grown up and the two of you have retired - will this man still love you? Luckily, you don't have to wait for years to pass to know the answer...there are a few gestures that'll give you the answer right now.

If your mister does these three small gestures today, you'll never need to doubt his love in the future:

1. He still looks at you the same way

Whether you have a few extra pounds from having his babies or have mascara running down your cheeks after finishing a sad book, a man who really loves you will still look at you in the same way he did when you first stole his heart. He doesn't see the sweats you've worn for a week because you have the flu or the scary haircut you came home with. A husband who will love you forever just sees you. He sees the girl he fell in love with and he believes you get more beautiful every day. You'll catch him staring at you for no reason, flashing a smile or a wink when you do notice his gaze. He can't get enough of your face and he loves staring into your eyes.

This will never change, no matter how many years pass.

2. He will let you have the last piece of pie

He'll also give you the last hot wing, the last of the milk for your breakfast or the last cookie for your lunch. He'll make sure you have the best spot for your sleeping bag when you pitch your tent to camp. He'll scoot over so can get comfy on the couch for movie night and then he'll make the popcorn. He'll drive across town to get that one item you need right before the store closes on Saturday night and he won't complain. He'll eat the not-so-yummy dinner you made and thank you for it, truly grateful that you tried.

In short, he'll notice the little things, do the little things and always share. These are lasting gestures of love that don't expire.

3. He believes in you and celebrates your talents and gifts

He is convinced you're the smartest, funniest, prettiest and most talented person he's ever known - and he will tell you so. He'll be proud of you and just tickled he's the lucky one who won you over. A husband who will love you forever will encourage you to learn new things, be your best self and grow to be even more accomplished. He'll be enamored with your knowledge, creativity, skills and ideas. He'll stay up late just so he can hear about your new ideas for your home, your vacation or your work. He'll value and seek your opinions and your input when making decisions.

His love for you as a person will only get richer with age.

Bonus: He will want to be with you.

When a man loves his woman, he'd rather be with her than anyone else, anywhere else. When he's at work, he'll wish he was with you and when he's with you, he'll wish for the time to never end. He'll want to come home from work. He will want to sit by you at dinner. He'll want to be wherever you are.

Each one of these little gestures are ways your husband tells you daily how much he loves you. They've become part of his daily ritual and won't change anytime soon.


Like what you see? Sign up here for our weekly FamilyShare email.

The post 3 gestures of a husband who will love you forever appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
7 things women need to stop doing to each other https://www.familytoday.com/self-care/7-things-women-need-to-stop-doing-to-each-other/ Fri, 27 May 2016 06:30:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/7-things-women-need-to-stop-doing-to-each-other/ We're all different - and that's the way we should be!

The post 7 things women need to stop doing to each other appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

Ladies, it's time we stop doing these things to each other.

1. Comparing

If there was only one mold that all women came out of then maybe comparisons would make a little bit more sense. For example, rough edges on one or a missing corner on another? There might be a reason to have a Quality Control Department for that.

Newsflash: women are not cut from one pattern.

What sense does it make to stand an oak tree next to a fir and run up a tally of points—high score winning? Firs and oaks are just different. Period. Both trees are beautiful and strong. End of story. Stop it with the comparisons. It gets you nowhere.

2. Gossiping and breaking confidences

If you want to be a good friend, or even a good fellow female traveler, stop whispering behind your sisters' backs.

Try this test: if you tell a woman something in confidence, wait and see if it comes back to you. If it does, it's a sure sign that woman can't be trusted. I know of nothing that destroys trust and faith in our girlfriends more than knowing someone has spoken about us behind our backs. If you want to be powerful—then gossip; if you want to be loved—never let those secrets leave your lips. Ever. And never ask others to share what you have no right to know.

3. Ignoring each other

Cold shoulders should be reserved for ski days and ice packs after rotator cuff injuries, not doled out at church or the workplace or neighborhood BBQ.

If women tried a little harder to just smile and kindly regard each other, the world would really be a much more peaceful place. It costs nothing to smile. It also costs $0.00 to be kind. If other women ignore you, there is no reason for you to stoop to their level. Hold your head up and be alert. Somewhere along your path today is at least one woman who could be greatly blessed simply by your acknowledgement that she exists.

4. Being nosey

If a woman wants you to know her business, she will tell you. If you try prying it out of her like opening a can without a can opener, serious risk is attached for you both to be cut by the jagged edges of that metal can. You don't really need to know as much as you think you're entitled to know, so just leave it alone. If there is a reason for you to know, in due time you will.

5. Withholding genuine praise and encouragement

So many women admire other women in their careers, style sense, mothering talents, cooking expertise, creative gifts, intelligence, and achievements, yet refuse to pay a compliment or give one another a genuine thumbs-up. Why? It's the competition factor.

If we want to be better women ourselves, we should help build each other up instead of tearing each other down. Withholding sincere support is abusive. Your kind words could be the very thing that helps someone else propel their interests forward, let alone your own. It's called the Law of the Harvest: withhold compliments, get none; be generous in your support of others, get it back tenfold.

6. Being uninterested in other mothers' children

Have you ever lived in a neighborhood long enough to have your children grow into adulthood there and then move away? A strange phenomenon takes place when younger families start to move in, yet because your own children are grown and there is no school or soccer or ballet connections to these other children, these newly moved-in mothers know nothing of your children and you know nothing of theirs. It can be a lonely thing for a woman to become an empty-nester and have no one ask how her children are doing.

Maybe you can see all the other young children at church and get a sense for who they are, but when your own have moved away and started families and careers of their own, being a mother in a community can become downright lonely. We should all be championing each other's children, even the grown-up ones that we haven't met.

7. Pouting

If a friend, coworker, or acquaintance starts acting differently toward you, instead of pouting and thinking it's all about you, turn outward and ask yourself what you can do for her. Not everything is about you. Maybe she has been ill or received bad news. Perhaps she is caring for someone sick or elderly and she is just bone-tired. There could be dozens of reasons. If you pout and choose to be offended, no doubt she will sense it and become even less enthusiastic about your connection to her. Be patient. Give her time. She'll come around. If she doesn't, that's okay, too. You're not meant to be besties with everyone. Smile and move forward. There are many friends out there to make.

The post 7 things women need to stop doing to each other appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
Are you too private about your worship? https://www.familytoday.com/family/are-you-too-private-about-your-worship/ Fri, 06 May 2016 14:29:54 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/are-you-too-private-about-your-worship/ Maybe this is what you need to hear.

The post Are you too private about your worship? appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

If you worship God, do your friends and family members know that you do? Do they see you worship or hear about your experiences while you worship? Maybe it's a deeply personal time for your spiritual rejuvenation and you don't share or tell. Is it possible that your worship could be enhanced merely by letting others know that you do it?

Some of us are private about our worship because of our personalities. More reserved people often don't try to intentionally keep things from others about their worship, but they aren't broadcasting them either. Some people might feel a very real risk of persecution or judgment, especially if they feel their way of worshipping isn't popular with their peers. Or some may be embarrassed to let others know why or when they worship, either out of lack of commitment to their religion, or lives that are not in harmony with what others know of their beliefs.

I don't think we need to brag about or keep score with people about our religious practices; on the contrary — it's good to be humble and reverent and not "doing alms before men," so to speak. But in everyday conversation with trusted friends and family, why not mention how you feel about a particular blessing that day, or your acknowledgement of the way you've seen God working in your life? By doing so, you may just bless the lives of people you had no idea needed to hear you simply express your gratitude to God through open acknowledgement of His gifts, or by a simple truth you came to understand.

A few months ago, I was at a place of worship for my faith. I ran into a sweet friend and we were exchanging loving greetings. I asked her how she was and I'll never forget her response: "Isn't it glorious? Being here in the same place, thinking the same things and feeling the same feelings?" It really was something I needed to hear. She was exactly right. On a day that I was burdened with burnout, worry, fear and discouragement, my kind friend shared a little pearl of wisdom with me. It was a provocative question and one that I'm still pondering today. Her happy declaration lifted my spirits, gave me my smile back and lightened my burden. How could she have known? What if she had thought those things only to herself — those simple, yet profound feelings of gratitude and awe for what we feel when we come to gather in that holy place?

Two years ago, I found myself in the hospital, about to undergo a serious procedure. I was a little anxious, but felt confident about going through with it. I really had no choice - the situation was out of my control. Before the doctor and his team started to work on me, I asked them if we could pray. It felt a little awkward for a few seconds, but after they agreed and I offered my simple and humble prayer, there was a different feeling in the room. It was happier; more peaceful. My relationship with my doctor, who is not of my same faith, grew in a mutual respect. Most of all, I felt happy because I had asked them to pray with me. Many friends I told about it felt I was crazy, saying they could never do that and asking, "Wasn't it just a little 'weird?'" No — It felt liberating, mutually respectful because I had asked for permission, and full of love and compassion. It felt like God Himself kissed the entire scene with his smile.

The way and how often we worship is a personal matter - deeply personal. But there are aspects of it that we can share, and should share, when we feel inspired, that can help lift and bless those around us. Maybe a little dose of your faith can help someone else. So be careful with how tightly you hold your practice of your faith to your chest. It is meant to be shared.

The post Are you too private about your worship? appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
When parenting changes your faith in God https://www.familytoday.com/family/when-parenting-changes-your-faith-in-god/ Mon, 04 Apr 2016 06:30:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/when-parenting-changes-your-faith-in-god/ That first night of motherhood was long and scary. Motherhood has taught me to know God, to trust Him, to…

The post When parenting changes your faith in God appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

I was almost 27 years old when I had our first child. I quit my job 2 weeks prior to my due date, hoping to finish preparations for our new little baby, but he was born the next day, quite in a little hurry to get here. He was tiny and skinny at barely 6 pounds, 22 inches. We were thrilled, scared, excited and happy.

The day we all went home, he was scrawny as he swam in the new car seat. We padded it with blankets to protect his little head, but he was still so small. With the awkward seat facing the rear of the car, I could not stand the thought of riding anywhere but next to my baby and so I did. My husband drove us home and all I could think about was how completely dependent this tiny little soul was on us.

That first night in our apartment, I did not know what to do. The baby was crying and obviously hungry. I wanted to nurse him, but my milk had not come in. He did not like the pacifier. He would not take a bottle. My husband got him to sleep and we fell into bed, exhausted. Only an hour had passed when we woke to a wailing little baby. I was scared. I could not get him to stop crying. I was so exhausted and too weak to walk the floor with him all night, frightened I would drop my precious baby. So I prayed. Like I've never prayed before.

I remembered the little infant seat we purchased to use for feedings and went to find it. I put my itsy-bitsy boy inside and covered him up. Then I collapsed on the floor next to him, gently rocking the seat back and forth with my hand, trying to help us both to sleep.

It was a long night. Baby would wake up, I'd feed him as best I knew how, put him back in the little seat, and stay by him again, and gently rocking him until my arm went to sleep. We did this several times through the night, all the time while I was praying to God. Please, I pleaded. Please, help me. My little boy needs me. You know what he needs, but I don't. Help me to help him.

By morning, my baby and I were bound to each other. We had made it together. He had been patient with me, his brand-new mommy, and I had protected him, my new little baby. And I knew that God had stayed with us all night.

Three years later, we added a darling daughter to our family. I was not afraid to bring her home that first night. I had learned how to listen to God about how to take care of new babies. I was more relaxed. I knew what to do. That night home, the four of us—-my husband, our little boy, and our baby girl and me, we all celebrated and bonded as we shared the wonder of our little family together.

Our son is now 24 and is on his way to medical school this summer. Our daughter is 21 and will start teaching junior high this coming fall. How speedily the time has commenced. There have been terrifying moments when our children have been hurt and very sick. Our son served a church mission where he thrived and I survived. We have seen them hurt by romances and friends. We have seen them fall and pick themselves back up. We have celebrated their successes and watched them grow. It has been beautiful.

<script type='text/javascript'>
var ut_ju = 'http://ads.undertone.com/aj';
ut=new Object();
ut.zoneid=114893;
</script>
<script type="text/javascript" src="http://cdn.undertone.com/js/ajs.js"></script>

I thought I knew what faith in God was before I became a mother, but if I did, it was insufficient, or a different kind of faith. Perhaps merely the kind of faith that everything would all work out, as people often say. It changed suddenly for me when I held those babies in my arms, knowing I was their only earthly mother and my husband their only earthly father. We had a huge responsibility and needed heavenly help. I could no longer afford to believe, because now I had to know. I needed to know that God would bless and protect my children. I needed to know He was really there. I needed to get closer to God so I could know what He wished me to do. It forced me to pray actively, even begging a lot of the time, for help in knowing how to be a good mother. I am grateful that God answered my prayers, not always immediately, but He always did and still does.

What motherhood has done for my faith in God is given me more compassion for Him as my Father. If I love my children as much as I do, and I know that God loves them still even more, then why would He not want to bless them and look out for them? He is their Heavenly Father and He is also mine. I can and do trust Him. I feel confident that He knows all, and I only know a shred.

What I think might be best, God knows is not. He has the whole view and I can only see a few hundred yards. Having babies has helped me to know God, to rely on Him, count on Him, and ask Him. Motherhood didn't change my faith in God as much as it gave me faith in God.

The post When parenting changes your faith in God appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
11 things to help you feel prettier in less than an hour https://www.familytoday.com/self-care/11-things-to-help-you-feel-prettier-in-less-than-an-hour/ Fri, 01 Apr 2016 16:18:55 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/11-things-to-help-you-feel-prettier-in-less-than-an-hour/ Stressed, tired, in a hurry? These tips are sure to help you boost your look in no time at all.

The post 11 things to help you feel prettier in less than an hour appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

You have somewhere to be with people to see and you look tired-exhausted, even. The thought occurs to you to cancel, but that isn't going to work this time. There has to be something you can do to pull off the perfect game face that won't give you away. No one needs to know you're fighting a cold or haven't had a decent night's sleep all week. You have under an hour to be out the door, so set your mark, get set and go!

1. Music

It's time to get to work, so put on some upbeat music and start feeling the beat!

2. Eye drops

You should keep two kinds in your medicine cabinet: one to take out the redness and (more importantly) one for moisture. Use the redness fighter first, letting the drops work in your closed eyes for several seconds, then add the moisturizing drops. Moisture drops come in a thicker gel form that feel divine in tired eyes.

3. Ice cubes

Get a couple of ice cubes and, holding them one at a time with a paper towel, slowly slide them over your entire already-clean face and neck until they are melted. This will reduce any puffiness or swelling and give your skin a pretty pink glow.

4. Moisturizer

It doesn't matter what kind you use. Just use something. Be generous with it and massage your face and neck lovingly using upward strokes while applying. Look into the mirror-see what a difference there is already? It's a miracle! You don't look so tired anymore!

5. Hot rollers

Bend over at the waist and gently brush your hair. Shake it out. Roll a few (or many) hot rollers at the crown of your head and wherever else you could use a little body and curl.

6. Tinted sunscreen

This is a must in order to prevent aging and skin damage, but it also evens out skin tone without appearing overly made up. Too heavy a hand with the foundation will just make you look more tired. If you need more coverage, add a drop or two of your foundation to your sunscreen, and blend it on the back of your hand before applying. Make sure to blend into your jaw line.

7. Concealer

Dot concealer in a V shape underneath each eye. Lightly dab over any blemishes you might have or around the nose to cover any redness. Let it set for a few minutes, perhaps while you're brushing your hair, then blend with your pinky finger or a moist makeup sponge. You see? We're making real progress now!

8. Eyeliner and mascara

How bold you go with the eyeliner is a matter of personal taste, but every woman looks prettier with some. Go for the winged look if you are skilled in this department; but, if not, just a little light lining along the top lashes will help open up your eyes and give them definition. Curl your lashes for extra lift. Add shadow, and don't skip the mascara. Apply to the top lashes, at the very least, and the bottom if you like.

9. Blush and lipstick

A pop of pretty blush on the apples of your cheeks always helps you feel more alive, and lipstick is the finishing touch. It's probably best to go for a light, natural, neutral shade on a day like today when you're feeling tired. Something with moisture or a little shine will make you feel so much better.

10. Cheerful clothes

Wear an item of clothing that makes you feel pretty or whatever makes you feel cheerful-whether it's something in your favorite color or the blouse that always draws compliments. Comfort is important, but no sweatpants here, ladies! You have pretty things in your closet that aren't that casual, so pull something out and put it on. See how good it looks and how it makes you feel?

11. Gratitude

You did it! You even have time to spare-enough time to stop, take some deep breaths, think happy thoughts and let gratitude enter your heart. Now bend down and stretch your fingertips to the floor, stand up straight, smile in the mirror and go! You look gorgeous!

The post 11 things to help you feel prettier in less than an hour appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>
6 reasons you should never let your kids have sleepovers https://www.familytoday.com/family/6-reasons-you-should-never-let-your-kids-have-sleepovers/ Wed, 30 Mar 2016 06:30:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/6-reasons-you-should-never-let-your-kids-have-sleepovers/ Nothing good ever happens in the wee hours of the night.

The post 6 reasons you should never let your kids have sleepovers appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>

1. No one needs to sleep at anyone's house but their own

It's not necessary. Fun? Maybe. Until the parents are asleep and the mischief starts. Sleeping is to be done at home, under the safety of one's own roof. Let them play all they want, but when it's time to go home and go to bed, it's time to go home and go to sleep. At home. Let your children go back and play the next day, and the day after that, but sleeping is for home. Period.

2. You don't know people as well as you think you do

How well do you know the people your child would like to sleepover with—your children's friends and their parents? Do you only see them at church? Or at soccer? Maybe you don't even know their names. Have you been in their homes? Do you know what actually goes on there? Are there things going on in the homes of your children's friends that you would not want your children exposed to? Do you really want your kids in the homes of others when everyone gets comfortable and walks around in their PJs? Should we really know each other that intimately? I don't think so.

3. Nothing good ever happens in the wee hours of the night

Listen, I know. I hosted and attended my fair share of sleepovers when I was a kid. Some were horrifying and others fun, but in the end, there was usually some untoward event that made girls "cross their hearts and hope to die and promise never to tell." The toilet papering and egging houses of people you were mad at or had a crush on. So immature. And in my day, kids got taken to the police station and parents were called if the kids were caught toilet papering.

What about the night one of my friends decided to tell us all about how girls really got their periods? It was awful and gave me nightmares. Thankfully, at the maturation program I learned that I was really not going to grow an Alien-like mass of eggs on the outside of my tummy that would eventually explode and I would nearly bleed to death!

Most of these shenanigans are deemed "innocent fun," but are actually really cruel to some. What is innocent about waiting for someone to fall asleep and then stealing their bra and freezing it in a jug of milk? What is kind about giving someone a sleeping pill without them knowing, waiting for them to fall asleep, and then drawing all over their face with markers and dumping a bottle of cheap perfume on them, waking them up, and taking their picture? Nothing. Nothing at all. Those things happened to me by my "friends" from church.

I was new in town and thought I made some good friends. This is what they did to me to "initiate" me. I didn't like it. After the second sleepover with these girls, where the hostess brought out the forbidden Ouija board and tried to force everyone to play, I gathered my things and went home because I had been taught not to play with Ouija boards. The girls laughed at me and it ruined me socially for a while, but still, I went home and I never went to another sleepover.

4. Why would you want to put yourself in a position to be wrongfully accused?

What if your kids host a sleepover at YOUR house? And you get in your jammies, and walk around the house. It's your house, after all. What if you decide to watch the movie with the kids? What if someone's child misunderstands something you say or do and points fingers? What if a kid just decides to make something up about you or your household, to get even with your child? It happens, folks. It really does. When we forbid other people to sleep at our houses, it protects everyone.

5. Sleepovers should be for very close family, in special circumstances only

And I even say this with caution. Many people should not be letting their kids sleep over with their family members. Just because you are related, does not mean you want your children exposed to the environment in your relatives' homes. Do not be afraid to offend. We were not. Your children are your primary and most important responsibility. Take it seriously.

6. Have a "no sleepover rule" and stick to it

When our children were very small and the invitations started coming in, we told them we had a "no sleepover" rule and explained why. They were welcome to attend until 10 or 11 p.m., and then they came home, slept in their own beds. If they wanted to go back in the morning for waffles, that was fine.

I was surprised at how well this actually worked and how supportive some parents were. I know my children got a little pushback from their friends, but because we never wavered with it, there was a firm expectation and it was respected, even if misunderstood. I know sometimes our children were very disappointed, but they got over it. Our job as parents has never been to give them everything they wanted anyway, but it has been to protect them and teach them. We never farmed that responsibility out to others.

The post 6 reasons you should never let your kids have sleepovers appeared first on FamilyToday.

]]>