On July 5, 1908, a West Virginia church sponsored the nation’s first organized event to exclusively honor fathers. The Sunday sermon was held in memory of three hundred and sixty-two men who had died in the previous December’s explosion at the Fairmont Coal Company mines in Monongah. Two hundred and fifty of the men were fathers, leaving many children fatherless. The event was a one-time commemoration; however, it paved the way for future male-focused celebrations and acknowledgments.

Sonora Smart Dodd, one of six children raised by a widower, is credited with creating Father’s Day. Her father, William Jackson Smart, a Civil War veteran raised Sonora and her five siblings by himself after his wife died during childbirth. Sonora rallied her local churches, the YMCA, shop owners, and government officials in Spokane, Washington. Everyone was very supportive and saw value in the holiday. On June 19, 1910, Washington State celebrated the nation’s first statewide Father’s Day.

Slowly, other states joined the celebratory efforts. In 1916, President Wilson honored the day by using telegraph signals to unroll a flag in Spokane when he pressed a button in Washington D.C. But the day would not become official until 1972 when President Richard Nixon signed the holiday into law and made the celebration a permanent national holiday which occurs on the third Sunday of June.

In case you are a history buff or interested in learning a little more about Father’s Day, here are a few fun facts.

• The film “Underwood”, released in 1996 is centered around a mobster that attempts to solve his father’s murder and settles the score on Father’s Day.
• During the Great Depression, even though it wasn’t a nationally recognized holiday, retailers marketed Father’s Day as a “second Christmas” for men. They promoted goods such as neckties, hats, socks, pipes and tobacco, golf clubs, and other sporting goods.
• It is estimated that Americans spend a total of $17 billion each year on Father’s Day gifts.
• During the 1920s and 1930s, there was a movement that pushed to scrap Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. The groups supporting the movement argued that the days should be combined and recognized as Parents’ Day. Even though it isn’t as popular, Parents’ Day is a holiday that is observed on the fourth Sunday of July every year. The United States created the day in 1994 under President Bill Clinton to mark appreciation for the commitment of parents towards their children.
• In other countries, especially in Europe and Latin America, fathers are honored on St. Joseph’s Day – a traditional Catholic holiday that falls on March 19th.
• According to Hallmark, Father’s Day is the fourth-largest card-sending day with an average of 72 million cards given every year.
• According to Census, in 2020, men make up 20 percent of single parents.
• Census says as of the year 2020, there are an estimated 215,000 stay-at-home dads in the United States.
• In Germany, Father’s Day is recognized as Men’s Day. On this day, fathers celebrate by getting drunk with wagons of beer and indulging in delicious foods. Police and emergency personnel are on high alert during Men’s Day.
• Ties are the most popular gift for dads on Father’s Day.
• On the original petition sent to Congress, by Dodd, the spelling of Father’s Day read Fathers’ Day.

Father’s Day is a special day to honor fathers and celebrate fatherhood, paternal bonds, and the influence of father figures on society. The national holiday has come a long way and is a wonderful way to honor those important men in our lives.

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It also doesn’t work if all the pressure is placed on one person to orchestrate the dates, romantic gestures, and do the foundational relationship work. Staying in love is truly a joint effort.

Here are the twenty-five ways couples can stay in love.

1. Acknowledge each other. Once the honeymoon phase is over, it is natural to treat your significant other like a roommate; however, it is important to know their love language and acknowledge them with that language. If you do not know your spouse’s love language, or maybe you don’t know your own, take the free test created by Gary Chapman. There is even a book if you want to learn more.

2. Listen when the other person talks and values their opinions.

3. Say the words, “I love you” on a regular basis.

4. Forgive each other. Everyone is bound to mistakenly neglect or say and do small thoughtless things. It is most likely not intentional. Instead of turning the issue into something bigger than it is, let it go and forgive your partner.

5. Do not stop flirting.

6. Compliment each other on a daily basis.

7. Be affectionate. The power of holding hands, a kiss or a hug is more impactful than you think.

8. Do things that you may not like. If your partner enjoys a TV show, make an effort to watch it together. If your partner enjoys viewing art, go with them.

9. Disconnect together. Turn off your phones and other digital distractions and just be together without interruptions. Try to do this at least once a week.

10. Avoid constant criticism – to yourself and each other.

11. Avoid being defensive and maintain an open state of mind.

12. Own your mistakes and take responsibility for your actions. Not only will this gesture prevent arguments, but your partner will respect you even more.

13. Keep your expectations in check and don’t allow background noise to affect your love story.

14. Always tell the truth.

15. Be considerate of your partner’s needs.

16. Share your feelings with your partner.

17. Keep dating each other by making time for just the two of you.

18. Take care of yourself and do not rely on your partner to create your own self-worth.

19. Be playful and make each other laugh.

20. Accept that you will not always agree, and fights are just fights – they are not deal-breakers. Players on the same team do not agree on everything and that is okay.

21. Try to be sympathetic and do not blow off your partner’s feelings.

22. Pitch in and help each other out with household chores and errands.

23. Be inclusive by informing each other of your individual plans. It is not a matter of asking for permission, it’s a matter of being courteous of your partner.

24. Be willing to have spontaneous moments to keep the fire alive.

25. Love each other conditionally every day.

There isn’t a how-to manual when it comes to relationships and thriving, but if you are willing to put in the work and incorporate these twenty-five things into your life, your chances of staying in love are very high!

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This is no fault of your own because as little girls we thought all happy couples wore glass slippers, would be paired with a bruting man that knew how to slay a dragon and just so happen to make enough money to swing the mortgage on a castle.

The reality is marriage includes none of those fantasies – it is actually better. You do not need to wear gowns and play the role of damsel in distress. Marriage is about simpler things that turn out to be the building blocks of happiness and a well-rounded life. While some of the things may seem somewhat comical, the reality is…married couples appreciate the little things.

For all the nostalgists out there, here is a list of the things I love about marriage.

1. Having a good and bad guy. Whether you are negotiating contracts or parenting your children, sometimes having a good and bad guy is a helpful tactic.

2. You never have to worry about being dateless.

3. You have an excuse to sneak away from those obligatory events early – baby showers, housewarming parties, birthday parties. Insert the comment, “Oh, I’m so sorry! I have to leave. [Insert spouse’s name], needs me to help with [insert task].”

4. You always have a second opinion to help you decide tough decisions.

5. Live in taste tester.

6. You have someone to grow old with.

7. You can take advantage of married tax breaks.

8. Married couples are less likely to be depressed. There’s even research to prove it, seriously, check it out.

9. A spouse challenges you to reach your goals.

10. You have someone that will be brutally honest to you – especially when you are in denial.

11. The emotional support of a spouse is priceless.

12. No more wedding planning – let’s be real, wedding planning is stressful and similar to that show The Amazing Race.

13. You will be viewed with newfound respect because everyone knows that marriage is full of checks and balances.

14. You will find and appreciate a newfound concept of contentment. This does not mean you should wear sweatpants every day and give up on your presentation, but it does mean that you can seek value in other things.

15. You are a family.

16. You have an opportunity to create new traditions.

17. You will have someone to laugh with (or at). Stressful moments are part of life and having someone to laugh with will make life more meaningful.

18. You have a ride-or-die shopping partner.

19. Your other relationships will prosper because you will learn how to communicate better with others.

20. You get to experience true levels of intimacy.

21. You have the opportunity to see things from a different perspective – sometimes varying opinions and thoughts are very helpful.

22. Being married means you have a lifelong travel partner. Road trips and other excursions are way more fun as a duo.

23. Your spouse will keep you balanced.

24. You have found a lifelong friend and confidant.

25. You do not have to deal with the crazy dating world and the ambiguity and uncertainty of dating apps.

When you realize that you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, everything else falls into place and sets the foundation for a new beginning that will last a lifetime. Martin Luther said it best, “There is no more lovely, friendly, and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage.”

Marriage is dating your spouse every day and not swiping left when things get rough. If you are able to focus on the things you love about marriage, you will realize that marriage is a blessing.

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Despite the exhausting long hours and often overlooked acts of hard work, moms keep going every day and continuously look out for everyone’s best interest.

In case you need a reminder of how much moms rock, here is the ultimate list.

1. Moms always know where everything is. Lost keys, shoes, uniforms, homework, or someone’s favorite stuffed animal, moms know where to find whatever is missing or misplaced.

2. Moms give the best hugs.

3. Mamas can blindly identify their child’s cry on the playground. She didn’t look up from her book because she knew that it wasn’t her child crying.

4. Moms always know the right things to say.

5. Or know, when to stay silent and allow the moment to play out – sometimes silence speaks louder.

6. Moms wake up in the middle of the night to help little ones go back to sleep and confront their nightmares.

7. Moms always think two steps ahead. Take a jacket in case it is chilly, grab a snack in case practice goes over, don’t forget your water bottle, or grab your umbrella because there is a chance of rain.

8. Mamas work around the clock to make sure that everyone’s needs are taken care of – chores, childcare, and other home responsibilities.

9. She is your guaranteed valentine every single year, no matter how old you are.

10. She is a force to be reckoned with. The infamous Maya Angelou says it best, “To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power.”

11. Moms are the best cheerleaders. It does not matter what a child has accomplished, moms are supportive and so proud.

12. In most cases, she rules the house. Women are usually the decision-makers in the household when it comes to all the things – dinner, purchases, etc. And, that generally makes them the manager of the house.

13. She has your back! Whether it is a bully at school or remembering that it is School Spirit Week, your mom will always be there for you.

14. Moms always have everything covered – Kleenex, toothpaste, greeting cards, band-aids, medicine, crayons, etc.

15. She always lets you lick the batter from the latest sweet treat she’s created.

16. Mamas are tough and they never back down from a challenge.

17. She never stops loving you because her love is unconditional.

18. Moms create the best traditions and the memories last for a lifetime.

19. Moms take care of their children when they are sick. They find a way to turn rough situations into a more manageable and less scary scenario.

20. Moms make you feel special. Whether it is a sweet note, cooking your favorite meal, or ironing your lucky shirt on picture day – moms are always willing to go the extra mile to make their children feel extra special.

21. She always remembers your birthday!

22. She can do everything – change the oil, cook dinner, throw a birthday party, landscape, pay the bills, etc.

23. They are brilliant multi-taskers! Seriously, no one can multi-task like a mother.

24. Moms never give up on you.

25. She understands you and will never let you down.

Basically, moms are superheroes! Without them, everyone would be lost, and the world would probably no longer exist. Remember, you don’t need a holiday like Mother’s Day to celebrate your mom’s awesomeness. Always look for ways to appreciate your mom and never pass up the moment to remind her how much you appreciate her.

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Thanks to Anna Jarvis, daughter of Ann Reeves Jarvis, Mother’s Day became a recognized holiday; however, it was not without a whole lot of hard work and perseverance. With most holidays recognizing men, Anna wanted to create a holiday that highlighted women. Following her mother’s death in 1905, Anna was inspired to create Mother’s Day – a way of honoring the sacrifices mothers make for their children.

The first Mother’s Day was organized and celebrated in May 1908 at a Methodist church in Grafton, West Virginia. On this day, a Philadelphia department store owner named John Wanamaker decided to financially back Mother’s Day and thousands of people responded by attending an event at his retail stores.

Anna wrote a ton of letters to newspapers and well-known politicians, hoping that they would rally behind her and support a nationally celebrated Mother’s Day. After several years of hitting the pavement, it worked. By 1912 many states, towns and churches adopted Mother’s Day as an annual holiday and the Mother’s Day International Association was established for the cause.

President Woodrow Wilson signed an official presidential document making the holiday official in the United States in 1914.

What many people probably don’t know is that Anna remained unmarried and childless her whole life. Her inspiration to create Mother’s Day was really influenced by her personal love for her own mother and the desire to have other mothers recognized. She saw how hard mothers worked and how they impacted the world.

To Anna’s dismay, Mother’s Day ended up snowballing into a commercialized holiday that has now become a “cash cow” for retailers. Anna’s version of the special day involved wearing a white carnation as a badge, spending quality time with a mother, and attending church services. She wanted to focus on experience over materialism.

Initially, Anna worked with the floral industry to raise the holiday’s profile. She didn’t expect the industry to transform into a commercialized monopoly and denounce the foundation of Mother’s Day. Sadly, due to the commercialized corruption, Anna spent the later years of her life campaigning against the holiday she worked so hard to establish. When she died in 1948, she disowned the holiday altogether and lobbied for the government to remove it from the calendar. She was disgusted by the lavish gifts and gestures.

Despite its retail ties, Mother’s Day has become a launching pad for feminist causes and equal rights. Coretta Scott King used Mother’s Day, in 1968, to host a march in support of underprivileged women and children. In the 1970s, women’s groups rallied together to fight for equal rights and fair access to childcare. As the years have progressed, celebrating Mother’s Day has continued with a sense of feminist solidarity.

Even though Mother’s Day has become a commercialized holiday, there is no denying that the holiday has created recognition for women across the world. It is really up to people like you, the reader, to do what you will with this history lesson. You can either continue to feed the retail industry and buy more stuff, or you can pay appreciation to your mother with quality time, words from the heart, and a kind gesture. You make the choice and write the future.

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Since autism can look different amongst everyone, understanding the general facts about Autism Spectrum Disorder is very important, so you can actually understand the disorder. Here are the common questions.

What does 'on the spectrum' mean?

It is an umbrella term for development disorders previously diagnosed separately as Asperger syndrome, childhood disintegrative disorder, Rett syndrome, pervasive development disorder, and others.

How can you identify the limitations of someone on the spectrum?

The best way to understand a person’s limitations and/or struggles is by talking with the person. Since everyone deals with the disorder in a different way, having a conversation about an individual’s diagnosis and experience is truly the best way to identify any limitations.

Can someone with Autism Spectrum Disorder work outside the home, attend college, or get married?

Yes, absolutely! Some people can function almost seamlessly and be on the spectrum. There is no cure for autism, but many high-functioning people on the spectrum do not consider themselves in need of a cure. There are different therapies and resources that help high-functioning people on the spectrum have completely normal day-to-day.

How or when is someone diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder?

Diagnosing Autism Spectrum Disorder can be difficult because there is not a single medical test such as a blood test. Doctors must rely on a child’s behavior and development to make a diagnosis. Even though some professionals believe a diagnosis at the young age of two years old is possible, most children do not receive a full diagnosis until they are much earlier. It is also harder for doctors to diagnosis Autism Spectrum Disorder in girls; therefore, a female’s condition is oftentimes overlooked.

Here are the most common myths debunked.

"Autism is a mental health disorder."

Autism is a neurological disorder. Studies have found that people with autism have abnormalities in brain structure and neurotransmitter levels.

"Autism is caused by vaccines."

There is no evidence linking childhood vaccination with autism.

"Autism is caused solely by environmental factors."

Scientists have identified that genes are one of the causes of autism. Environmental factors can influence the symptom severity that an individual experiences.

"People on the spectrum cannot feel love and lack empathic feelings."

While individuals with autism may struggle with social interaction, they can still feel love and have empathic feelings. Just because they express their feelings differently does not mean they are incapable of experiencing or expressing love.

If you are interested in learning more about the spectrum and how you can be a better human being to people living on the spectrum, there are a lot of wonderful books written by professionals and actual individuals who live with Autism Spectrum Disorder. Here are some of our recommendations.

• • The Reason I Jump by Naoki Higashida
  • Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Asperger’s by John Elder Robison
  • Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism by Barry M. Prizant

If you’re a parent and seeking books for your children, here are age-appropriate recommendations for children to consider.

• All My Stripes by Shaina Rudolph (picture book)
• The Kids’ Guide to Staying Awesome and In Control by Lauren Brukner (great for tweens and teens)
• My Emotions Journal: Feelings Journal for Kids (all ages)

It is important to know and understand that someone on the spectrum is capable and shouldn’t be treated as unqualified because of their disability. Even though an individual on the spectrum may experience additional hurdles and struggles in life, that does not mean they are unable to achieve the same goals and experience the same successes as someone not diagnosed with autism.

The post What Does ‘On the Spectrum’ Really Mean? appeared first on FamilyToday.

Given the social distancing policies in effect, parents and employers must be creative when it comes to "Take Your Kid to Work Day," but it is definitely not impossible. Here are a few ways you can keep the tradition alive.

Make it a big deal.

Make space in your workspace for your little person and set everything up the night before. Your child will feel special and appreciate the extra effort. Grab an extra chair, an extra notepad for them to take notes (or doodle), and consider making a fun sign. Your sign doesn’t need to be fancy – just fun!

You can grab a piece of computer paper and write welcome with markers, or if you are feeling fancy you can change your computer desktop background or screensaver to a festive ‘welcome’ sign.

Schedule a virtual meet-and-greet.

Reach out to your supervisor and co-workers and schedule a short 15-20 meet-and-greet virtual meeting. This is a fun way for your child to see who you interact with on a daily basis at work. Ask everyone to introduce themselves and share a little bit about why they enjoy their job. Have everyone explain how the team works together to get the job done.

Get into action.

Show your child what your work looks like. If you are an Editor, read through a few paragraphs of a manuscript with them. If you are an accountant, reconcile a purchase order or expense report with your child. If you are an engineer, take your child through the process of drawing up a blueprint. While you’re in action, explain what you’re doing and how your work will impact others.

If you use special software, give your child a quick overview of how it works and why it is useful in your profession. It is important to give your child a visual of how you work, so they can better understand your career.

Take a short field trip.

Break for lunch with your kiddo and allow them to ask questions about your job. If your office isn’t far away, consider doing a quick drive-by and show your child where the office is located – this can be a fun way to change scenery and still adhere to social distancing protocols.

Provide your child with a task/project to complete.

Beforehand, think through a fun task or project to give your child that mirrors one you do in your role. Obviously, you’ll want to make it fun and kid-friendly. Provide supplies to help your child really own this project and take it seriously. If you are a graphic designer, ask your child to use software to create a cool sign or mockup. If you are a teacher, ask your child to create a lesson plan to teach a section you’re about to cover in your real class. The possibilities are endless, and your child will appreciate your intentionality.

"Take Your Child to Work Day" is an opportunity for children to see adults in action and provides them with a real-life glimpse of what adulting looks like. It is important for parents to maintain normalcy and continue traditions despite the weird times we are living through. Not only will your child appreciate your efforts, but you’ll create fun memories to cherish for many years.

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In 2020, the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) reported that approximately 1 in 54 children in the United States is diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder (ASD). Therefore, it is highly likely that children will either already know someone with autism or encounter someone with ASD during their schooling. While teachers and the school are responsible for making the necessary accommodations for children with autism, it is a parent’s job to raise kids that support autism awareness.

With the help of strong people speaking out about autism and information becoming more readily available, there are a plethora of resources for parents to use to teach their children about autism awareness. Here are our recommendations.

1. Show Support

April is Autism Awareness month. It is a time to celebrate the inclusion and acceptance of those with autism. Consider wearing royal blue and inviting your children to do the same – royal blue is the official autism awareness color. You can also show support for autism by donating to official organizations that provide research dollars and share the hashtag #LightItUpBlue on your social media channels.

2. Schedule a Play Date

We can better understand each other if we take the time to be together. Reach out to an autistic classmate and find a time and place where your child and their classmate can play. Ask the other parent if there are restrictions for the other child – noise sensitivities, bright colors, surrounding concerns, etc.

Also, ask if there are any specific activities that the child enjoys and try to center the playdate around those favorites. Having your child witness your accepting behavior will be a great example. Simply showing up for others is a wonderful way to show your children that differences do not matter and we better together.

3. Check Out Artwork

There are many organizations that feature artwork by autistic individuals. You can have a virtual outing by viewing the artwork on your laptop with your child, or you can make arrangements to visit a local exhibit. Some of the organizations allow you to support autism by purchasing handmade items. Here are some options.

• • Bittersweetfarm.org: The mission of Bittersweet, Inc. is to positively impact the lives of individuals with autism and those whose lives they touch. The goal is to increase autonomy and self-reliance, empower choices, maximize dignity, and encourage interaction through vocational, residential, community living, transitional school, and recreational programs. Their Creative Arts Program allows individuals to create art and express themselves, while also reducing anxiety. Some examples of artwork include ceramic pieces, paintings, woven placements, table runners, jewelry, and fused glass.
  • Brian Watkins Gallery: Brian Watkins is autistic and uses his creative energy to create greeting cards, wrapping sheets with gift tags and other great notecard items.
  • Renewing the Renaissance: The organization was started to support, both financially and spiritually, artists on the autism spectrum. Their goal is to connect wonderfully talented artists with patrons, so they can sell their work and make connections with people that show the artists they are supported and their work is meaningful. The purchases create dignity, professional development, community, and original artwork.

4. Teach Your Child About Empathy

Empathy is something that we all must learn. Raising a child that understands empathy will help them have compassion for people, like individuals living with autism, and provide them with the ability to see past someone’s struggles. Empathy is something that parents should introduce and teach their children at a very young age and the conversation should continue as they get older. Read Brightly has created a brilliant list of suggested reads for all ages. Library Mom has another stellar list that we recommend checking out.

5. Videos

If your child is a visual learner, videos are a great way to introduce and educate children about autism. Most of the autism awareness videos are created by people that know how to articulate ASD on a level children, of all ages, can better understand. Here is a list of videos we recommend checking out.

• "I’m Just Like You" by Jack Hartmann
• "Sesame Street: Meet Julia"
• "PBS" has a great extended look at this episode and provides more autism awareness.
• "Amazing Things Happen" by Alexander Amelines

Autism awareness must start with parents. Adults should take the initiative to help their children become better aware and educated on the conditions that people live with – even if they are not directly affected by a specific condition, such as autism. Having a better understanding of ASD will empower children to be better people that care for others.

The post 5 Ways You Can Raise Kids That Support Autism Awareness appeared first on FamilyToday.

Now that we have cleared the air let’s talk about how you can appropriately handle sibling rivalry.

Kids fight over literally…everything. She got a bigger slice of pizza. He got more screen time. I don’t want to watch this show again. Why is she looking at me? He is sitting too close to me. Does any of that sound familiar?

 Don't Yell

Yelling can silence rivaling siblings, but it is not the mature response. It is not appropriate to yell at your children for arguing with each other – responding to hostile behavior with more hostile behavior is not a real solution; it is a band-aid. Take a deep breath and inquire about the disagreement. In a calm voice, address the manner. Was someone in the wrong? Could someone be reacting in an unnecessary way? Offer a quick solution but thoughtful solution.

Suggest Space

Sometimes the answer to a fight is simple…space. We all need alone time because it gives us time to reset and reevaluate our attitude or mood. Encourage fighting siblings to separate and do their own thing for a while. In most cases, a little time alone will squash a disagreement and give everyone an opportunity to evaluate their behavior in a calm environment. Offering time alone will help a child reflect on their actions and assess how they could process things differently.

Mediate

When siblings are arguing, being a parent is a lot like being a referee. It is up to the parent to create a safe space for everyone. Stay calm and encourage your children to do the same. Once everyone has stopped arguing, allow each child to state their argument or qualm and then facilitate mediation. Ask each child how their sibling’s reactions and words made each other feel and try to find a resolution. For example, maybe a sibling dislikes when their sibling plays video games loudly. The solution could be using headphones when playing the video game or agreeing to a volume level that is less disruptive.

In many cases, parents expect their children to be problem solvers and identify a solution to a conflict; however, children will never know how to problem solve if their parents do not use real-life examples to teach them. It is quicker for parents to solve problems amongst siblings, but everyone will benefit if parents take the time to teach their children how to solve their own issues.

Stay Neutral

If parents pick a side, siblings will use that to their advantage. Parents should always state the facts and offer solutions that are more of a compromise versus stating who is in the wrong. While the wrongdoer will understand their actions, there is no need for a parent to point the finger because that will create animosity.

Have Ground Rules

Everyone has disagreements, and it is important for children to understand the normality within rivalry. Let your children know that violence is never okay and saying mean things is hurtful and not tolerated. When having a disagreement, you’re not allowed to bring up the past and previously resolved arguments. Also, each person is entitled to have their own space, and other siblings are not allowed to go into that safe space.

Spend Time With Each Child

As a parent, you must be proactive. If you want your child to trust you, then establishing a strong foundation is imperative. Make a point to interact and communicate with your child on a one-on-one basis as much as possible because that individual time will help your child understand that you’re on their side. By having time together, your child will be less likely to compare themselves to their siblings, feel emotionally inferior, and will have a better temperament when handling a disagreement.

Even though the fighting can seem petty, it is important to remember that the disagreements that siblings have with each other will help them function as adults later in life. With everything, we must learn as children the right and wrong way to handle ourselves – and sibling rivalry is how we all learn to treat others as we engage in friendships and relationships.

The post Tips to Handle Sibling Rivalry appeared first on FamilyToday.

Interesting, right? Here is what we found.

Firstborns

Let’s be for real; firstborns are trial-and-error babies because their parents did not really know what they were doing. Parents most likely read every parenting book and attended the first-time parenting classes available on how to be the best parent; however, later, they will find out that there is no class or certification that credits someone as being the best parent. In fact, parents are more likely to waste time worrying versus enjoying parenthood.

Firstborn personality traits include reliable, meticulous, cautious, goal-oriented, and being somewhat of an overachiever.

Michelle P. Maidenberg, Ph.D., a child and family therapist in White Plains, New York, says, “They often have an intense fear of failure, so nothing they accomplish feels good enough. They’re typically inflexible – they don’t like change and are hesitant to step out of their comfort zone.” Nonetheless, most firstborns have Type A personalities.

Since firstborns are given a lot of responsibility within the home, they tend to take charge later on in life and can sometimes be bossy.

Middle Children

The middle child is oftentimes the people pleaser because they feel like they are constantly being compared to their older and younger siblings. “The middle child often feels left out and a sense of, ‘Well, I’m not the oldest. I’m not the youngest. Who am I?’” says therapist and author Meri Wallace. Since middle children feel a sense of displacement, they usually assert themselves with their peers.

Middle children are often rebellious, popular, very social, and deemed as the peacemaker.

Middle children go with the flow and possess a great understanding of negotiating and compromising – they’re able to get along with just about everyone. Linda Dunlap, Ph.D. professor of psychology at Marist College, says, “They're usually the first of their siblings to take a trip with another family or to want to sleep at a friend’s house.” Middle children are aware that they do not receive as much attention from their parents and can sometimes feel lost and seek validity.

Youngest Children

These kids are the most free-spirited and often referred to as strong-willed because they are used to living with fewer rules and regulations. Oftentimes, parents are mentally exhausted and much more lenient with the youngest child.

The youngest children are often described as very outgoing, manipulative, self-centered, and always need attention.

The youngest children are charming and more agreeable than their siblings. Oftentimes, the youngest children have the spotlight because of their adventurous spirit. Dr. Kevin Leman, a psychologist and author, says that the youngest children grapple with the feeling of not being deemed as important.

“None of their accomplishments seem original. Their siblings have already learned to talk, read, and ride a bike. So, parents react with less spontaneous joy at their accomplishments.” Younger children are creative and seek out ways to drive attention towards them.

Only Children

If a child doesn’t have anyone else to compete against, they will always have their parent’s support and resources without any distractions. While the constant attention and support is a plus, sometimes it can also be a con and emotionally cripple a child later in life.

Only children tend to be perfectionists, very mature, diligent, and excellent leaders.

Only children tend to be very well-spoken because they are surrounded by adults and most likely treated as if they are older than their age. When only children begin to develop friendships and relationships, there is a strong possibility that they struggle within their relationships because they are accustomed to receiving all of the attention and being the prime focus.

Each child is unique and is equipped with their own personality traits, but there is proven science to help better understand why an individual possesses certain traits. By understanding the birth order influence on an individual’s personality, parents (and teachers) can better interact and identify how to help children grow up and function within their everyday lives. Having more knowledge of behavioral mannerisms and tendencies can help a child cope and better understand hardships and successes.

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