Mayra Colón – FamilyToday https://www.familytoday.com Here today, better tomorrow. Fri, 11 Aug 2017 12:01:19 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=5.8.3 https://wp-media.familytoday.com/2020/03/favicon.ico Mayra Colón – FamilyToday https://www.familytoday.com 32 32 What to say when people won’t stop asking when you’re going to have a baby https://www.familytoday.com/family/what-to-say-when-people-wont-stop-asking-when-youre-going-to-have-a-baby/ Fri, 11 Aug 2017 12:01:19 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/what-to-say-when-people-wont-stop-asking-when-youre-going-to-have-a-baby/ Pressure from others should never affect your personal decisions.

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You dread family gatherings or get-togethers with friends because you know the question is coming: "What is taking you so long to have a baby?"

It didn't bother you the first few times; but after a while, the question becomes overbearing.

Personally, the question upsets me. The topic becomes uncomfortable when people say how much my husband and I are missing out on by not being parents. They say I'm selfish, and insist on pursuing the conversation.

Having children is a personal decision. Here are a few things to keep in mind when the topic arises:

Some women can't have children

Often, insisting on a private matter only hurts the woman who desperately wants to bring a blessing into this world, but for one reason or another cannot. The constant questioning, pushy attitude and frowning down at a woman for not having a child is disrespectful.

Some women are simply not ready

For some, not having children has nothing to do with losing their figure or a lack of funds. Some women are simply not emotionally or mentally prepared. Having a child solely because of others' pressure to do so would be irresponsible.

Here are two ways to handle the inevitable question when faced with it:

Be honest

If you choose to answer, politely tell them the truth. Speak from the heart, and explain that the decision is a personal choice. Next time they might think twice before inquiring.

Kindly refuse

You have every right to decline discussing the topic, and respectfully walk away or change the conversation. Others will understand they are overstepping their boundaries.

Many family members and friends don't mean to be rude asking the question. But don't allow pressure to make this important decision for you. You will know when it's the right time.

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How to defeat adult bullying (with God’s help) https://www.familytoday.com/family/how-to-defeat-adult-bullying-with-gods-help/ Fri, 21 Jul 2017 12:39:42 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/how-to-defeat-adult-bullying-with-gods-help/ Bullying others is not the answer. Let God's teachings be our solution.

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You hear the word "bullying" and you immediately associate it with children and teenagers. But adults are bullied too - you'll find bullying in friendships, relationships and in the workplace.

Significant others, friends, bosses and co-workers use bullying as a tactic to intimate you. Being a bully lets someone else be in control. Your boss may bully his employees because he knows they fear losing their jobs and wouldn't dare stand up to him.

The unfortunate truth

Bullying is all too common. It starts on the playground and continues into adulthood. As common as it may be, it's important to know that if you do not act against bullying, it can destroy who you are.

My actions against harassment varied throughout my life. As a young child I did very little to fight back. I was afraid to stand up for myself. Sadly, the bullies realized my weakness and continued. Later, I did report it to authorities, but eventually, they just moved on to someone they believed was weaker than me.

Being bullied as an adult

As I grew into a young adult, I experienced bullying in intimate relationships and in the work place. This time I wanted to be strong and not timid. I wanted to show others that I had what it took to fight back - I reacted with insults and a hot-temper. It did nothing to solve my problems and only made those around me afraid I was a bully, too.

I asked God to help me find a balance between weakness and aggressiveness. And he answered my prayers.

Asking God for help

Today, I find that people who are just getting to know me confuse my kindness and calmness for weakness. They believe I do not have a voice. However, I am not weak and I do have a voice. I am strong-minded. I simply choose my battles carefully. It took prayer and maturity to understand that bullying back is never the answer.

I decided that how others perceive me is their choice. I don't have to defend myself or proof anything - and you shouldn't have to either. You can pray to God to help you overcome your bullies while still keeping your kind and calm disposition. I learned to take care of myself, while still reaching out with prayer and compassion.

No matter your situation, the one thing you should do is allow God lead the way.

Below are two ways to stand up to bullying:

1. Prayer

Psalms 18:3 reads, "I will call upon the Lord, who is worthy, to be praised: so shall I be saved from mine enemies."

Prayer is a powerful instrument. Praying will give you the inner strength to stand up for yourself without losing your dignity. When bullies realize you have the strength and courage to not play their game, they will back down. They will see your strong will and know they won't be able to intimidate you.

2. Be assertive but show compassion

Fighting back physically or with a sharp tongue is never the answer. It may seem cowardly to not bully others back as a way to fight, but the best way to defeat bullying is to stand firm and assert your calm strength. Let bullies know their actions are not hurting you, they are just hurting themselves.

Realize their actions are motivated by insecurities. Show them God's love and remember the words in Romans, chapter 12:20: "Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head." God's place is give judgement and vengeance - it is your place to serve those, even if they are your enemies.

As much as we want to end bullying entirely, it's impossible. But we can stop it one situation at a time by setting a positive example for others. Make a commitment to stand up to bullies with God as our leader.

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5 signs you are out of touch with your spirituality https://www.familytoday.com/family/5-signs-you-are-out-of-touch-with-your-spirituality/ Thu, 22 Jun 2017 14:19:38 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/5-signs-you-are-out-of-touch-with-your-spirituality/ Are you feeling alone even though you are surrounded by loved ones?

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You could be in a crowded room filled with family and friends, and yet you feel lonely and disconnected. You pull away from the people who care about you and from the things that bring you joy. And you struggle against those negative feelings. But unfortunately, ignoring this can affect your well-being, your relationships and how you function.

There was a period during my early adulthood when I isolated myself. I was physically present, but not mentally or emotionally. I wanted to be alone. My thoughts were built on frustration and grudges. I didn't see the bright side of things. I refused to listen to family when they said God would take care of things. How was that possible? I prayed to Him, but I didn't see change. I was upset with God.

It took a lot of family support and the drive to want help before I understood God wasn't ignoring me. He was listening, but He was waiting for me to draw closer to Him. He needed me to embrace my spirituality. When I finally did, I was able to let go of what weighed me down. I gained back control of my life and strengthened my emotional and mental stability. Once I accepted God, I never looked back.

1. You don't have trust in prayer

Maybe you say you believe and have faith. When life is not going as planned, you may even pray for positive change and enlightenment. But when time passes with no change, you begin to lose hope. You doubt God is listening. The truth is He is listening to every word in our minds and hearts. God's timing and plans are usually different from ours. But He will answer and give us what we need at the right time. Praying to God is believing without seeing - that is faith.

2. You refuse to forgive

It's hard to forgive - at least right away. Many believe it's better to stay angry at someone or at life. But it's not. Not forgiving creates bitterness, destroys our inner peace and pulls us farther away from God. People will hurt us and we will suffer rough patches. But part of our spirituality is knowing God will carry us through. We are never alone. God is with us through good and bad.

3. You're judgmental

Judging people negatively is used to take attention from ourselves. It is a way to make ourselves feel better if we've done something wrong. Unfortunately, pinpointing someone else's faults is not God's way. He doesn't want us to judge one another. He wants us to love each other as He loves us.

4. You never assume responsibility

Blaming others for our mistakes will make life more empty. God created us to support one another, not destroy one another. We all have imperfections; so when we make a mistake, admit it, ask for forgiveness and be better moving forward.

5. You lack spiritual understanding

It's difficult to understand the meaning of spirituality and what it entails. It's more than just prayer. It's believing in God without always seeing, accepting others for who they truly are, genuinely wanting the best for others, and so much more. Our spiritual journey should include building a relationship with God so we can understand more fully that - and how - He loves and guides us.

Getting in touch with our spirituality is vital for our soul. It helps us gain and keep a healthier outlook on life. The process doesn't happen overnight; it's gradual. But there is so much satisfaction once we embrace it. There's no better feeling than that of knowing we have a relationship with a father in heaven who loves us.

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3 ways God restores our inner peace https://www.familytoday.com/self-care/3-ways-god-restores-our-inner-peace/ Sat, 15 Apr 2017 06:36:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/3-ways-god-restores-our-inner-peace/ When life becomes a state of uncertainties, God will lead the way.

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Maintaining inner peace is a challenge. Every day we strive to balance family, work and our well-being, all while trying to keep a positive and peaceful attitude. Things seem to be going exactly how we planned, but then life throws us a curveball. Unexpected or unresolved issues surface and create uncertainty and doubt. Unfortunately, we allow the circumstances to rob us from our peace - this very thing happened to me.

When my father passed away 28 years ago, I understood and accepted why God called him back home. Daddy was suffering, and not only from his illness. However, I always felt unsettled because I never had a chance tell him goodbye. A few years ago, I discovered more details about his passing. My heart was left empty. There were many questions I couldn't answer. The desperation of not knowing or not being able to do anything for him consumed my thoughts and erased any sort of peace I had.

Then one day, on the verge of an emotional breakdown, I turned to God and asked for his guidance and love. I asked him to wrap me with his peace. Something in my heart told me I cannot change what happened...But I can control how I handle my emotions. Though the pain of losing my father will never go away, I am able to cope with the information I received. Through prayer, courage and understanding, God restored my inner peace.

Here are three ways God restores our peace:

1. Prayer

Praying is a powerful tool that's always within our reach. It doesn't matter where or how we pray; what matters is the faith and trust we have in God. Anytime we feel defeated, we can turn to him for his peace. God wants us to call on him. With God on our side, with God covering us with his peace, there is no way we can lose.

2. Understanding

When our minds are preoccupied, we tend to not think clearly. We become overwhelmed. But what if for a moment, we set our worries aside and ask God to help us understand why we're experiencing such hardships. In the King James Bible, we read from the Philippians 4:7 "And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."

The second we are willing to listen and open our hearts to God's message, the sooner we will understand.

3. Courage

Troubles are no walk in the park. Sometimes we hopelessness and despair flood our lives. We allow our obstacles to steal our peace, but it's unfair to us and those around us. God needs us to stand strong against all odds. Through his strength, he grants us the courage to confront what we think we cannot handle. With God's courage, we will be amazed at how strong we actually are.

Our struggles can easily overshadow our sense of tranquility. However, God has an abundance of peace to offer us. All we need to do is ask. He will fill our minds and hearts with inner peace. Believe in God and trust all things will only get better.


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4 ways to tell if God is communicating to you through your dreams https://www.familytoday.com/self-care/4-ways-to-tell-if-god-is-communicating-to-you-through-your-dreams/ Fri, 31 Mar 2017 06:26:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/4-ways-to-tell-if-god-is-communicating-to-you-through-your-dreams/ Do you wake up from a dream convinced God is communicating with you ... but then doubt the possibility?

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We are surrounded by spiritual messages but due to our hectic schedules, we tend to lose our spiritual focus and see the messages as something else. With busy minds, we ignore these spiritual signs.

This is when dreams come in.

During a time of struggle, I dared to doubt and question God. I refused to hear words of wisdom from people trying to uplift me. I failed to realize that God was reaching out to me through them. Until one night, when God communicated to me in a dream.

This dream felt more real than anything I have ever felt. While I slept, God used someone I love deeply to pass on his message. He knew I would listen then. This person revealed the answer to an intimate question I had asked God earlier that day. That dream was a confirmation of God's existence and because of that emotional dream, I have fully embraced God and his messages.

For many of us, a dream is just a dream. We wake up not remembering it at all, or just catch vague glimpses. But there are times when these dreams are undeniably vivid - we guess there is something or someone trying to reach out to us. But what can it be? Who can it be? We must trust our insights. God reaches out in many ways.

Here are four ways God is communicating to us through our dreams:

1. God speaks to us through others

When God attempts to communicate with us through a friend, family member or even a stranger and we turn away from that person, chances are he will resend the message in a dream. Often, this person in the dream is no longer with us. God will not reveal himself, but he will allow a love one to convey his message. He knows we will listen to our love one. When we wake from that special moment, we had the opportunity to reconnect with the departed and receive God's guidance with an open heart.

2. God speaks to us through a situation

How many of us have relived (or lived) a real-life situation in a dream? Even though we are sleeping, subconsciously our concerns are still running through our brains. Reliving or living a similar situation through a dream is God's way of showing us the necessary steps we need to take to solve our current problem.

3. God speaks to us through angels

We don't dream with familiar faces all the time - we have strangers who are part of our dreams. Sometimes these strangers mention our troubles or warn us about something. While you sleep, remember that angels don't always reveal themselves with huge wings and shining a bright light. Sometimes they disguise themselves as people, just passing through our dreams to transmitting God's message.

4. God speaks to us through numbers

Dreaming with numbers can also be a way God speaks to us. Consider searching the specifics numbers in the Bible and God will reveal himself through that particular passage.

In the King James Bible, we read from Numbers 12:6 "And he said, Hear now my words: If there be a prophet among you, I the Lord will make myself known unto him in a vision, and will speak unto him in a dream." God always listens and responds to our prayers - sometimes he responds to us while we dream.


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3 reasons your husband avoids public affection https://www.familytoday.com/relationships/3-reasons-your-husband-avoids-public-affection/ Fri, 03 Apr 2015 06:30:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/3-reasons-your-husband-avoids-public-affection/ Ever wonder why your husband is against PDA? Don't worry. It's not what you think.

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Not all men are comfortable with public displays of affection (PDA). While some have no issues holding hands or hugging their wives in front of others, there are those who feel awkward with too much PDA. It took my husband some time to demonstrate his affection in public - hugs, holding hands or even just a peck on the lips. He's not a shy guy. He's just reserved.

When you and your husband are in public and he limits his affection to holding hands or gentle hugs, chances are he is being respectful. Many couples take public displays of affection a little too far, making family, friends or even strangers feel uncomfortable. On the other hand, if your husband shuns any form of public affection, you begin to wonder what is wrong, and you question yourself. "Does he not love me? Is he embarrassed of me? Does he have someone else?"

It's natural to worry, but it's best to take a deep breath and figure out the real reasons for that lack of affection. Here are some possibilities.

Timid

Your husband wants to show you affection, but he is too shy. The idea of sharing emotional feelings in public embarrasses him - especially if he is a private person. Some guys just prefer to keep certain displays of affection between them and their wives.

Upbringing

Perhaps your husband grew up in an environment in which he felt unloved or unwanted. As a young child, he received little to no hugs or kisses before leaving for school or before bedtime. Perhaps he didn't see much love between his parents. Due to a lack of love and affection in his childhood, he may have internalized that pattern. As an adult, it will be hard for him to give affection.

Personality

Your husband loves you. He doesn't mind showing you how much he loves you; however, he doesn't see the need to show affection in public. That's just how he is. I can recall a couple of men in my family - from an older generation - who were very private with their wives. Though they were given love as children, they felt the need to keep their emotional sides away from the public eye. It was just how they were. Believe it or not, there are men today who firmly believe that displays of affection should be intimate moments shared between two people - not for the world to see.

Once you figure out the reasons why your husband is reluctant to display public affection, encourage him to join you in expressing your love. Lead by example. Take the first step in showing public affection. Gently grab his hand while going for a walk together, standing in line at the movies or at a party. When he least expects it, whisper into his ear that you love him, and wrap your arm around his waist. Demonstrating small gestures of love each day can help put your husband at ease.

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10 sweet things men do that are creepy to their dates https://www.familytoday.com/relationships/10-sweet-things-men-do-that-are-creepy-to-their-dates/ Sat, 28 Mar 2015 06:30:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/10-sweet-things-men-do-that-are-creepy-to-their-dates/ Sorry, guys. But some of your lovely gestures don't always go as planned.

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Are you still in the dating scene? Has a date ever done or said something he thought was sweet that just made you feel uncomfortable?

If yes, you are not alone.

Perhaps you just want to date without commitment, or maybe you're waiting for Mr. Right. Regardless of your intentions, you take dating slowly - cautiously. However, the guy you are dating has a different agenda. He wants something serious and pushes the envelope a little too far.

Here are 10 things guys do to be sweet that end up being creepy.

1. Shows up unannounced

For an official couple, showing up without announcement is acceptable. But if your date is just getting to know you, appearing at your work or at your front door is pretty creepy. He means to give you full attention, but he needs to respect your space.

2. Shuts off his phone when he is with you

This may not seem as creepy. After all, your date doesn't want interruptions - that's sweet. But a man shutting off his phone can seem suspicious, and a woman may wonder if he is trying to avoid contact with someone else.

3. Keeps track of your every move

Every chance he gets, he is asking where you are and who are you with. He wants full details of your day. Again, you are just dating. You are not seeing each other exclusively, and he does not have the liberty to ask those questions. He is overstepping his boundaries.

4. Bombards you

You feel he is overdoing the phone calls and texts messages. Of course, you love attention, but when the attention becomes too much to handle, you get turned off.

5. Orders for you

You step away to freshen up and, before you know it, your date has already ordered your meal without knowing your tastes - or your allergies.

6. Immediately talks about family

While a woman who wants a family appreciates a man who shares similar feelings, it is uncomfortable when your date does not take the time to learn whether or not having a family interests you right now.

7. Takes you to the same old places

It is sweet to go to the same restaurant you visited on your first date - when it is an occasion such as an anniversary. It is not sweet to visit the same spot over and over again while you are dating.

8. Takes you shopping

Every girl loves it when a man takes her shopping, but not when the man has ulterior motives. He is vocal about your fashion sense. He wants you to wear something of his liking on the next date. It might be safe to say there will be no next date.

9. Has plans for your future

Your handsome date discusses his strict future plans with you, including how he foresees life with his future wife. He expects his wife to be a stay-at-home mom, but you want to pursue your career and think about a family later. Just when you thought your date could have been the one, his plans crush your dreams.

10. Brings his children on the date

There is nothing wrong with a man who cares about and loves his children, but it is strange bringing children on a new date - especially without warning. Maybe the babysitter had to cancel, but a quick phone call to let you know the kids are coming along is in order.

Daters should get to know one another without pressure. If the guy you are dating is overwhelming you or doing things that put you on edge, talk to him about it. If he persists in behaving the same way, don't feel obligated to continue dating him. Your happiness and sanity come first.

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5 ways to be closer to your spouse https://www.familytoday.com/relationships/5-ways-to-be-closer-to-your-spouse/ Fri, 27 Mar 2015 06:35:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/5-ways-to-be-closer-to-your-spouse/ At some point, distance between spouses seems inevitable. Here's how to close the gap.

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Are there moments you feel a slight distance between you and your spouse? Do you worry that distance means your partner no longer loves you? My husband and I felt this way early in our marriage, and it took a while before we decided to openly discuss how we felt. We understood the distance had nothing to do with how much we loved each other and a lot to do with a lack of time together. We hadn't noticed how the extracurricular activities and overtime at work had consumed most of our personal time, greatly reducing our time together.

When there is distance between spouses, lack of love is not always the case. Oftentimes, distance has to do with intense work schedules, overabundance of children's activities or just a simple need to "reboot." Married couples become overwhelmed with their everyday routines, and they forget to enjoy each other's company.

Here are five tips to get closer to your spouse:

1. Be available

When you see your spouse down or unhappy, do not wait for him or her to tell you what happened. If your spouse is the type to feel out of place explaining problems or does not want to worry you, he or she will not volunteer any information. Ask what is wrong and what you can do to help.

2. Be affectionate

If your household is in a constant rush, you and your spouse may forget to kiss before leaving for work or before heading to bed. You may forget to hold hands while running errands together. You may forget to tell your spouse how handsome/beautiful he or she looks that day. Sometimes, you do not have to say a word. A simple touch of the shoulder or a hug out of the blue can say it all.

3. Be spontaneous

Step out of your comfort zone and out of the everyday routine. Instead of waking up to the same to-do list, break the habit by creating a new agenda right now. Forget doing the chores for a day and take your spouse out for lunch at your favorite spot or go to the movies. Find an activity you and your spouse can enjoy together.

4. Be a good listener

It's imperative that you and your spouse listen to each other. For example, a husband might have reservations revealing his feelings if he senses his wife is not interested. A wife may withhold her feelings because she assumes her husband may not understand her the way her girlfriends do. Try putting these feelings aside and listen without judgment. Besides being husband and wife, you are also best friends.

5. Be encouraging

When you marry, you become each other's cheerleaders. Perhaps your spouse received a promotion, started a new career or decided to go back to college. Make sure your spouse knows you are on the sidelines, rooting every step of the way.

Try not to let busy schedules put a gap between you and your spouse. It's wonderful to know you do love each other, but you both deserve to enjoy that love - together.

5 ways to be closer to your spouse

Tag your spouse and tell them you love them!

Posted by I Love My Family (FamilyShare.com) on Monday, May 23, 2016

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Have you failed at marriage? https://www.familytoday.com/relationships/have-you-failed-at-marriage/ Sat, 21 Mar 2015 06:30:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/have-you-failed-at-marriage/ Just because you failed doesn't mean you're a failure. There's a lot you know now that you didn't know before.

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Getting divorced wasn't pleasant, but it did have a positive side. Divorce taught me strength and maturity. During the time I spent single, I analyzed what had gone wrong - on my side and my ex's. Because I took the time to sum up my relationship, I remarried knowing a lot more about marriage. Almost 10 years later, I'm still learning, but the best of the learning process is that my husband and I are doing it together.

A failed marriage is devastating. You feel let down and embarrassed in front of family and friends. But there is nothing shameful about divorce. We all make mistakes. Though it is better to rectify those mistakes while you can, a failed marriage does not mean you will fail at your next one.

Try to give yourself enough time to recuperate before jumping into another relationship. In the meantime, here are some common marriage issues to learn from before you move into your next relationship.

No love

While this is, perhaps, the most obvious, a surprising number of couples marry for reasons outside of love. For example, some people are afraid of being alone. Time passes by and they realize they have yet to marry and start families. They commit to marriage in hopes of something positive coming out of it. Another loveless reason to marry is convenience. Some marry in order to leave home or gain some type of financial benefit. If you enter a marriage feeling no love at all, chances are, you will not have a successful marriage.

Failure to communicate well

You and your spouse talk, but the conversations are brief. There is no depth to your conversations. You realize you speak more to your best friend than to your spouse. You may feel uneasy about something in your marriage, but you choose not to discuss the issue with your spouse. Instead, you hope for the problem to go away or hope your spouse will eventually pick up on what is troubling you. It is tricky to make a marriage work when you hide your feelings and do nothing about them. Communication is a must in all relationships - especially marriage.

Spending little or no time together

You and your spouse find any excuse not to spend quality time together. You spend too much time at work, with family and friends, or even in the same house but in different locations. On days off, you might decide to spend time watching a movie while your spouse is out with friends. Spending too much time apart causes a gap in your marriage. It's not a bad idea to spend days off together, doing something fun or just relaxing on the couch.

Acting single

When you go out with friends, you dress attractively. You may take off your wedding band and place it in your pocket. If an opportunity presents itself, you give your cell phone number to people you just met. Depending on the situation, you avoid speaking of your spouse, as though he or she doesn't exist.

Lack of support when it comes to the children

You do everything on your own. You dress the kids, cook for them, pick them up from school, help with their homework, take them to see doctors... Only one parent is present. Your spouse expects you to handle everything. Sometimes, a little help is all you're asking for.

Discontinue doing nice things for each other

Since you are already married, you and your spouse feel there is no need to keep the sparks going. There is no need for romantic date nights, flowers, jewelry or "I love you."

Addicted to social media

You spend all your free time on social media and ignore your spouse. He or she is speaking to you, but you're not really listening. You are so involved in what you are doing, your spouse feels left out and unwanted.

Marriage is something you have to want to work on every day. As long as you and your new spouse love each other, fighting to avoid these common marriage pitfalls, you will find it easy to work toward a blessed marriage.

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3 ways you’re embarrassing your spouse on Facebook https://www.familytoday.com/relationships/3-ways-youre-embarrassing-your-spouse-on-facebook/ Thu, 19 Mar 2015 06:30:00 +0000 http://www.famifi.com/oc/3-ways-youre-embarrassing-your-spouse-on-facebook/ It's a little too easy to get caught up in the Facebook wave and forget the person who matters most…

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When used properly, Facebook is a helpful and enjoyable social media platform that connects you with family and friends. My husband and I have Facebook, but we limit the time we spend on it. Besides the fact that it is time consuming, we no longer feel comfortable sharing much of our personal lives. We have seen how indulging in too much information leads to conflict and embarrassment.

Oftentimes, a person posts a status update assuming it is harmless - just pure entertainment; however, he may later realize what he posted was embarrassing or inappropriate.

Here are three ways you're embarrassing your spouse on Facebook without even realizing it.

Starting an argument

You post an opinion, but it comes across as rude, escalating to a nasty argument. For example, you and your spouse likely share mutual friends even if you do not hold close relationships with these people. You read a mutual friend's status (which has nothing to do with you or your spouse) and you dislike what you read. You feel the need to respond, and your comment comes across as offensive.

Though you have the right to your opinion, it's important to exercise caution when you express how you feel - especially when the issue happens to involve your spouse's coworkers or business partners. An offensive comment causes unnecessary tension between your spouse and others.

You may also start an argument between you and your spouse. Instead of resolving your issues in the privacy of your home, you drag the argument online for everyone to read. You post a status belittling your spouse or describing why you are highly upset. Not only do your friends read this, but some friends take the liberty of commenting. Now your private matter is on public display.

Compromising images

Let's say your spouse is reluctant when it comes to displaying certain images - for example, photos from childhood or college days. You decide to post them anyway for "flashback Friday" or "throwback Thursday" for all of your friends (and their friends) to see. The images may be laughed at, judged or both. And though you posted the pictures for fun, you actually embarrassed your spouse. Not only have you disrespected your spouse's wishes, you have allowed the Facebook community to ridicule your spouse.

Flirting

Many may see flirting as innocent, but flirting quickly gets out of hand. A person can cross the line from behind a screen instead of face to face. Whether or not your spouse is on Facebook, posting flirtatious statuses/responses or sending flirty messages is disrespectful and leads others to believe you do not value your marriage. If your spouse found out, imagine the embarrassment and hurt he or she would feel.

All social media platforms should be a place of positive connectivity, places for sharing fun, respectful material. Perhaps it is a good idea to consider your spouse before posting a status or an image. You do not want to accidentally humiliate the love of your life.

The post 3 ways you’re embarrassing your spouse on Facebook appeared first on FamilyToday.

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