Editor's note: This article was originally published on Lindsey Bell's blog. It has been republished here with permission.

Most parents I know want to raise financially responsible kids. I know I do.

Unfortunately, many of us never learned how to handle money ourselves, let alone how to teach our kids how to handle it.

Here are a few tips to get you started.

1. Start early

If your children are under the age of 5, this is the perfect time to start teaching them. If, however, your children are older, it's never too late to start! Your job might be slightly more difficult, but it's still certainly possible to raise financially stable children, even if you're starting late.

2. Consider paying your children for some of their chores

There's a huge debate among experts about whether or not you should pay your kid for chores. Some say you shouldn't because it will teach kids they only have to help if they are going to be paid.

Others, though, say you should pay them for their work because that's how the world works. As an adult, you don't get paid if you don't work. Our kids, then, should also only be paid when they work.

My husband and I have chosen to pay our kids for some of their chores, while at the same time requiring some chores simply because they are part of the family.

Ultimately, it's up to you how to approach this issue. Pray about it. Talk with your spouse if you're married. And then stick with whatever you decide.

3. Allow them to make mistakes while they are under your watch

If your child wants to spend all of his hard-earned money on a toy that will likely break in five minutes, allow him to. It's important for our children to make small mistakes while they are under our watch so that (hopefully) they won't make large mistakes once they're not.

4. Teach them to save, give, and spend wisely

When your child receives money for chores or even birthdays or holidays, help him divide the money into three categories: saving, spending, and giving. You could use a three-part bank or three envelopes or jars or something similar to help him understand.

5. Set a good example

If we don't know how to handle our money, we'll have a much more difficult time teaching our kids to handle theirs. Our kids are learning from what we do, much more than from what we say.

The post How to teach your kids about money appeared first on FamilyToday.

Editor's note: This article was originally published on Lindsey Bell's blog. It has been modified and republished here with permission.

You don't have to have a lot of money to have a memorable date night.

Here are a few ideas to get you started "¦

Top 10 Stay-at-Home Date Night Ideas

1. Living Room Picnic

Put a blanket on the floor of your living room and enjoy a picnic together. Finish the night off by watching a sunset together.

2. Cook-off Challenge

Each of you choose a new recipe you would love to try. Then cook for each other and see whose dish tastes the best.

3. Virtual Vacation

No money? No vacation time? No big deal. Have fun planning your dream vacation. Who knows? Maybe someday you'll be able to actually go!

4. Movie Marathon

Pull out some of your favorite movies, and enjoy a night of movies from the comfort of your own home.

5. Game Night

Scrabble anyone? Or Monopoly or Yahtzee? If you're married and want to add a little spice to the night, you might want to pull out Twister.

6. Dinner by candlelight

Bring the romance to your dinner table by eating by candlelight.

7. Dp-it-yourself Photo Booth

Make your very own photo booth and then take turns posing for the camera with silly glasses, hats, etc.

8. Relive the Magic

Watch your wedding video or look through photo albums from your wedding, dating years, or honeymoon.

9. Do-it-yourself Fun

Pull up one of those do-it-yourself home projects on Pinterest and tackle it together. Or give a room in your home a new coat of paint.

10. Get lost in discussion

See what new things you can learn about your spouse. Here are several ideas to get you started.

What are some of your favorite stay-at-home date night ideas?

The post 10 worthwhile stay-at-home date ideas appeared first on FamilyToday.

Editor's note: This article was originally published on Lindsey Bell's blog. It has been republished here with permission.

We moms are way too hard on each other

Take stay-at-home moms and working moms, for example.

Instead of realizing we are all on the same team, we look at each other as opponents.

It's almost like we assume another woman's choice somehow threatens ours. Like if I support your decision to work, I'm also admitting I made a poor choice to stay at home with my kids.

But it's not an either/or issue. Whether you work outside of the home or stay at home with your children has very little to do with whether or not you are a good mother.

I'm a stay-at-home mom, but that doesn't make me any better (or worse) of a mother than you.

Here's the truth:

If you work because you need the money, you are a good mother. On the other hand, if you stay at home because you don't want to spend money on childcare, you are also a good mother.

If you work because you need the socialization outside of the home, you are a good mother. If you stay at home because it's a sacrifice you're willing to make, you are also a good mother.

If you work because you love your job or if you stay at home and plan to return to work later, both of you are good mothers.

If you work because your job gives you a creative outlet, you are a good mother. If you stay at home and find other ways to use your creativity, you also are a good mother.

A woman is a good mother, not because she works outside the home or doesn't work outside the home. She is a good mother because she loves her children. Period.

I believe there are some women who are better moms specifically because they work. Not in spite of, but because.

They would be miserable at home all day, and a miserable mother is not as good as a happy one.

The question we need to ask ourselves as we decide whether or not to work outside the home is not "Will I be a good mother if I do this?" Instead, we need to ask ourselves, "Which decision will help me love my kids more?"

If staying at home will help you love them more, then that is the best decision for your family. If working outside the home will do it, then that's what you should do.

Moms, it's time we stop being so hard on each other and let each family make its own decision. It's time we stay-at-home moms start supporting our sisters who work and vice versa.

So from one stay-at-home mother to all of you working moms out there, I support you and your decision to work. I believe you are a good mother.

The post Dear working mom: You are a good mom appeared first on FamilyToday.

Editor's note: This article was originally published on Lindsey Bell's blog. It has been republished here with permission.

His clothes were tattered.

His hair was dirty.

And he pushed an old shopping cart (which, I'm guessing, held everything he owned).

I knew he was probably homeless. But my four-year-old son didn't. Not yet. He was too young to understand. Too young to have preconceived notions about the way someone looked.

We saw this man a few months ago, during an unusually cold day in May. As we drove by in our relatively new (less than 10 years old) car, my son saw him first and asked me, "Mom, why doesn't he go inside and get warm?"

I didn't say anything for a second, trying to figure out the best way to explain homelessness to a four year old. I finally landed on, "He probably doesn't have anywhere to go, Son."

"Why doesn't he just go home?" If only it were so simple.

I was quiet again, not wanting to say too much or too little and most certainly not wanting to crush his innocence. "He doesn't have a home."

"He could come to our house and sleep in my room." Again, so simple. My mommy-heart was so proud in that moment. My son wanted to help. He wanted to do something. He didn't care about the way the man looked or smelled. He didn't worry he might steal something from his room or worse. He simply saw a need and wanted to meet it.

What saddened me, though, was that I didn't.

I didn't really want to help. I didn't really want to do anything except get home and go about my day. To be honest, I was too scared of the "risk."

Well, maybe that's not honest.

Because scared probably isn't the best word. Selfish is probably much better.

Instead of reach out to someone in need (someone, by the way, who is just like me except that he ran across some difficult times), I chose to drive by and go about my selfish ways.

As I sit here now on my Macbook in my air conditioned home and think about a future blog post I plan to write (on teaching generosity to our children, no less), I feel like a schmuck.

Because here's the truth. If our children aren't generous, it's probably our fault.

Most kids I know have an innate desire to help hurting people. When a little girl sees a crying baby, she instinctively tries to soothe him. When a three year old runs across a hurt animal, he wants to help it.

Sure, there might be exceptions to this. Some kids might not be instinctively kind. But most of them are. Or at least "¦ they would be if we wouldn't discourage their generous efforts.

I'm by no means saying we should take in every homeless person we meet and potentially put our families at risk. But I am saying we shouldn't be so comfortable just driving by. We should wantto do something. We should want to help.

There's something wrong with us "¦ with me "¦ if we don't.

The post Why kids aren’t generous appeared first on FamilyToday.

Editor's note: This article was originally published on Lindsey Bell's blog. It has been republished here with permission.

Most Christians want to believe they are trusting God with their money

After all, who wants to admit they love money more than they love God? That they think about their finances more than they think about their Savior? That they worry about their future more than they trust God with it? That they rarely give back to the One who gave them everything?

We all want to believe we are trusting God with our money; the only problem is "¦ sometimes "¦ deep in our hearts, we know it's not entirely true.

We know our checkbook does not reflect the life of someone who has given God everything.

We know our constant worry over how we're going to pay the next bill does not reflect the life of someone trusting God with her future.

And we know giving God our leftovers does not reflect the life of someone who claims to have given God all.

All too often, when we think about what it looks like to give God our money, we focus on the wrong part of the equation.

We focus on the money when God is focusing on the heart.

Trusting God with your finances has less to do with your money and more to do with your heart.

Because here's the truth: You could have a perfectly balanced checkbook and still have money as your idol. You could have a hefty savings account that you worked hard to develop. You practiced good stewardship, budgeted, and saved and yet you could still worship the gift over the Giver. Or on the flip side, you could have very little money and still cling to it so tightly that God isn't able to open your clinched fists.

The amount of money you have or don't have is not what matters most (at least not to God); what matters most is what you do with it and where your heart is.

Trusting God with your money is more about your heart than about your finances

The trouble with this, of course, is that it's harder to gauge a heart than a checkbook.

As I was thinking about this topic and trying to figure out how we can know if we are trusting God with our finances, the Lord led me to these four characteristics.

These four outward signs provide evidence that your heart is in the right place "¦ that you are, in fact, trusting God with your money.

4 Signs You Are Trusting God with Your Finances

1. You Give

Generosity is one of the key ways to tell if you love your stuff. If you're willing to give it up, you probably aren't clinging to it too much. On the other hand, if you struggle to let go of that $20.00 or that favorite sweater or whatever the item might be, it's a good indication your heart might be a bit too attached to something other than the Father.

2. You Don't Love Money

A second indicator that you are trusting God with your finances is that you don't love money.

It's tempting (for those of us with fixed incomes) to assume that the love of money is only an issue if you make a lot. But let me assure you, it's just as easy for someone who lives in poverty to worship money as someone who lives in luxury.

The question is not whether you have a lot of money; the question is whether or not you love the money you have.

When you have to choose between making more money and being with your family, what do you choose?

When you have to choose between saving for yourself or giving to someone in need, what do you choose?

When God lays it on your heart to meet a need, do you do it "¦ or hesitate because of the cost?

3. You Don't Worry

A third sign that you trust God with your finances is that you don't worry.

Hebrews 13:5 says, "Don't love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said, 'I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.'"

I love the application of this verse. God is saying through the book of Hebrews, "You don't need to love money. You don't need to trust in your wealth to take care of you, because that's MY job. I will never fail you. I will never abandon you. Trust in ME ... not in your money."

When we worry, we basically tell God we don't know if he can handle our futures. We don't know if he's capable enough or loving enough to take care of us.

Those who trust God with their money also trust Him with their futures

4. You are a Good Steward of the Money You Have (whether it's a lot or a little)

Those who trust God with their money recognize the importance of managing it well.

In Matthew 25: 14-30, Jesus told the parable of the three servants. Two of the servants used the money their master gave them and gained more. The third servant, though, was too afraid to do so. Instead, he hid the money and later returned it to his master.

The application of these verses to us is pretty straightforward: Manage well the things God has given you (and that includes money, gifts, time, and anything else God has given us).

I'll be the first to admit that handling money can be difficult. We are a family of four living on one ministerial salary. It's hard. I have learned over the years, though, that the amount of money you make (or don't make) is not really what matters as far as stewardship is concerned.

You can make a lot and be a terrible steward, just as easily as you can make a little and be a terrible steward. And vice versa. The key aspects of stewardship are heart and diligence.

The post 4 signs you trust God with your money appeared first on FamilyToday.

Editor's note: This article was originally published on Lindsey Bell's blog. It has been republished here with permission.

I don't know how you do it

Really, I don't.

When I've had a rough day at home with the kids and my husband gets home, he often gives me a few minutes to myself.

You don't get that.

When I want to get groceries without little ones clinging to my legs, I have the option of leaving my children at home with my husband.

You don't.

I also have the choice of getting to work outside the home or stay at home with my kids. You have to work because you are the sole source of income for your family.

And that's just brushing the surface on the complexities of single parenting. We haven't even touched on the financial difficulties, co-parenting complexities, scheduling problems, etc.

So allow me to give you the credit you deserve. You are wearing the shoes of two parents, trying to fill the role of not just mom, but also dad.

That's a hard job for anyone. I'm amazed by what you're able to do, and honestly, you don't get enough credit.

I don't know why your child's father isn't around. Maybe you never really knew him. Maybe he passed away. Maybe he left. Or maybe he travels all the time for work. Regardless of the cause of his absence, you deserve a pat on the back for the hard work you do day in and day out.

I know too many single moms who beat themselves up because their kids don't have a father. They struggle with guilt because they can't give their child the gift of two parents.

Here's the thing, though. Living with guilt won't produce a father figure. All it will do is steal your happiness.

So instead "¦ I want to offer you some ideas. I'm not a single mom, but I know plenty of women who are. And here are some tips these women and others wanted to share with you.

Tips for Single Moms

1. Appreciate what you have instead of focusing on what your life is lacking

This goes for all of us, not just single moms. It's so easy to focus on what we lack instead of what we've been given. Unfortunately, when we focus on what's missing, we miss what we have.

2. Be happy with yourself instead of looking for a man (or anything else, for that matter) to make you happy.

The key to being happy with yourself, I've found, is to find your identity in Christ. Let him make you whole instead of looking to someone (or something) else to fill that void in your life.

3. Raise your kids in church and around godly men

This is especially important if your children's father is not a positive example in their lives. Surround your kids with positive role models, both male and female. Maybe even ask a godly man in your life (a friend or family member) to allow your children to tag along with his family on occasion. Just because your kids don't have a father in their home doesn't mean they can't have a father figure in their lives.

4. Trust God with your life and with the lives of your children

God loves your children even more than you do, and He will be a dependable Father for them at all times.

5. Take guilt-free time away from the kids

And don't just do this for errands. Get a pedicure. Exercise. Get dinner with friends. Do something you love, something that will renew your spirit and encourage you.

6. Build relationships with those who care for your child

Look to these men and women as resources or sounding boards. These people know (and hopefully love) your child and can help you when issues arise.

7. Don't be afraid to ask for help from family and friends

Make your needs known to those around you, because they can't help you if they don't know how to help. (On this same note "¦ Church, reach out to single moms. Think about ways you can minister to them. Some ideas that come to mind "¦ help them with their lawns or with home improvement projects, help them with their vehicles, provide childcare or Mommy evenings out, etc.)

8. Work to co-parent as best you can

This is hard when the other parent is drastically different than you, but it's important for the sake of the kids to do this as smoothly as possible. Avoid speaking poorly of the other parent. Be respectful of your ex. Allow your child to talk about his or her other parent, and don't discourage any positive feelings toward him.

9. Take care of yourself

Get some sleep. Exercise. Eat meals (not just scraps). When you parent 24/7, it's easy to let your own health fall by the wayside. One of my Facebook friends said it well, though: "The healthier you are, the healthier your relationships with your kids will be."

10. Teach your children about money and about depending on God for what you need

It's tempting as a single mom to rely only on yourself. Let your kids see you rely on God for what you need, and they, in turn, will learn to rely on God too.

11. Remember "¦ God is your Maker and your Husband

You can depend on Him, even when everyone else lets you down.

12. Give yourself some credit

Being a single mom is hard, so cut yourself some slack. Don't fall into the guilt trap. Instead, believe in yourself and in the future God has for you.

13. Cut your schedule as needed

Be realistic about the things you sign up for. You are only one person, and you can't do everything.

14. Don't fall into the trap of thinking you need to fill your child's life with "stuff" to make up for the absence of a father.

First of all, stuff can't fill the shoes of a person. And second, you probably don't have a ton of extra money to spend on stuff anyway.

15. Be his mom

Dr. Kevin Leman says this well in his book "What a Difference a Mom Makes," "You're your son's mom. You're not his dad. Try to be both and you'll fail miserably "¦ But be his mom and work on keeping a heart connection with him, and you'll earn his respect and his love for the rest of his life."

The post Dear Single Mom appeared first on FamilyToday.

Editor's note: This article was originally published on Lindsey Bell's blog. It has been modified and republished here with permission.

October 15 is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.

It's the day when men and women all over the world light candles in memory of the babies they have lost.

I lit four candles in memory of Eden, Jesse, Ella, and Jadon.

Each of these four babies holds a piece of my heart. A piece that no matter how much time passes, I won't ever get back.

Some people assume that miscarriage or babyloss grief will go away with time. And, yes, in a way the pain has lessened. But it won't ever go away. There will always be a part of me that longs for my babies I never got to hold.

If someone you know has recently lost a baby, there are so many things you can do to help. Here are just a few:

How to help someone who has lost a baby

1. Do something in memory of her baby

After each of our losses, our friends and family stepped in and did amazing things to show us how much they cared.

Memorial Ideas:

• A blanket in memory of the baby

• A garden, plant, or tree

• A shadow box for ultrasound pictures or other mementos

• Jewelry

• Cards

• A poem or letter to the baby

• Flowers

2. Allow her to feel whatever she is feeling

If she's angry, let her be angry. If she's crying uncontrollably, let her cry. (Be a shoulder for her to cry on.) You can't fix this for her. She needs to feel these emotions (even the emotions she doesn't want to feel) so that she can work through them.

3. Remember with her, especially on difficult days

Some of the most difficult days for babyloss survivors are:

• The Due Date

• The Anniversary of Loss

• Mother's Day

• October 15

• The Day She Finds Out She is Pregnant Again

• The Day She Finds Out Other People are Pregnant Again

• The Times When People Ask Her How Many Kids She Has

People sometimes hesitate to say anything to babyloss survivors because they don't want to bring it up and cause more pain. Here's the thing, though. We are most likely already thinking about it, so you're not bringing up something that is far from our minds.

Bringing it up shows us you care.

4. Refrain from offering answers

I know you want to help. You want to fix this for her. But honestly, you can't. The best thing you can do for her right now is to be there for her.

After going through four miscarriages, I have heard pretty much every "answer."

Here are a few things I would recommend NOT saying after someone loses a baby: "God needed your child more than you did."

• "You just have to trust His plans. He knows what he's doing."

• "At least you have one child (or fill in the blank)."

• "You'll have another."

• "It's time you moved on."

Instead of offering "answers," here are a few things you can say:

• "I'm sorry."

• "What can I do to help?" (And then be ready with a suggestion if she doesn't have any ideas)

• "I'm praying for you." (And than actually pray)

• "I'm remembering your baby with you."

• "I'm here." "I love you."

• "This sucks." (Yes, it's blunt. But it's also the truth. One of the most helpful things someone said to me after one of our miscarriages was this.)

5. Point her to resources that might help

Tell her about October 15th, give her books that might help, or point her to a good Christian counselor.

6. Do something practical to help

Watch her other children while she goes to the doctor or miscarries at home. Bring her a meal. Come clean her house. These things help SO much.

7. Love her. No matter what

More than anything else, she needs your love right now. So love her. You might say the wrong thing, you might do the wrong thing, but she will see your heart.

Love her, and be the hands and feet of Jesus to her at a time when she might be searching for Him more than ever before.

The post When someone you love loses a baby appeared first on FamilyToday.

What's that one thing for which you're waiting?

That one thing you know will make you happy?

Maybe it's a new job or a promotion that will help you pay the bills and stop living paycheck to paycheck.

Or maybe it's a relationship. You'll be happy once you finally have a man who treats you the way you deserve to be treated.

Or maybe it's a baby. I know all too well how hard it is to wait for a baby. I feel like I've been "in waiting" for about three years. When my oldest child was two, we started trying to have another baby. Three years and four miscarriages later, we still don't have the biological child I'm waiting for.

Waiting for something (or someone) can be excruciating, especially when it seems God is no longer listening to your prayers. When it seems he's more interested in granting other people their desires than even thinking about granting yours.

I don't know what that one thing is for you.

What I do know is this "¦ you'll never find happiness until you stop depending on the future (and on what may or may not happen) to make you happy.

You can't hang your happiness on that one thing for which you're waiting

In the last few months, God has been gently reminding me (OK, sometimes not so gently reminding me) that I'm taking what I do have for granted.

I'm focusing so much on what I don't have that I'm neglecting to see what I do

He's reminding me that there is only one way to find happiness as you wait "¦ and that is to stop searching for more.

Don't look outside of what you have for the happiness that's within your grasp now. Instead, learn to find joy in what's already right in front of you.

I say that like it's easy "¦ but I know from personal experience it's not. It's a daily struggle for me to be thankful.

For me, it's a choice.

A daily choice to thank God for the children I do have instead of thinking about the ones I'm missing.

A daily choice to thank Him for the money I have instead of worrying if it'll be enough.

And a daily choice to focus on what's right in front of me instead of wishing for more.

The one thing that'll make you happy as you wait "¦ more than anything else, it's you "¦ choosing to be thankful now.

The post The one thing that will make you happy as you wait appeared first on FamilyToday.

I am a natural saver "¦ always have been.

My husband, on the other hand, is a natural spender. He typically already knows how he will spend his money before he receives it.

Money could easily become an issue of conflict in our home, but for a few reasons (that I'll share below), it hasn't often done so.

_Just because a saver marries a spender does not mean conflict is inevitable._

Here are a few ways to prevent the conflict before it happens:

What to do when a saver marries a spender

1. Have a monthly money meeting

My husband and I sit down once a month to talk about finances. Is it something we enjoy? Not really. Is it our idea of a thrilling evening? Definitely not. But it's necessary and beneficial to our marriage.

We talk about what we did well with our finances last month and what we'd like to do differently in the coming month. We look at our budget and make adjustments (more on that in the next point).

2. Live on a budget

I know some people hate living on a budget. They feel like it prevents them from ever doing anything fun with their money. They hate the amount of work it entails. They don't like to be "told" what to do with their hard-earned money.

But here's the thing. Living on a budget enables both my husband and me to have a say in the way our finances are handled. We set up the budget TOGETHER, and we make changes TOGETHER. We decide beforehand how much "blow money" each of us will receive, as well as how much money we will save. Living on a budget stops many arguments before they even have time to develop because we both know ahead of time how most of our money will be spent.

My husband knows he will get money that he can spend on whatever he wants (without my judgment or questions). I do as well.

3. Decide on an "approval limit."

If something comes up outside of your normal budgeted needs (which could happen often!), have a plan of what you will do. Decide on a certain amount that either of you can spend without seeking the approval of the other person. Then, if something comes up that is over the "approval limit," talk to your spouse before you spend the money.

4. Compromise

There are many times my husband has graciously agreed to forgo a purchase because of my desire to not spend money. There have also been many times I have agreed to spend some extra cash on something my husband really desires.

_The key to handling money issues in marriage is communication and compromise._If either of these elements are missing from a marriage, disagreements are sure to come.

5. Value the differences of your spouse

My husband has taught me a lot about enjoying life, easing up, and trusting God with my future. I hope I have taught him about being prepared and saving for emergencies. We complement each other. His desire to spend isn't wrong, any more than my desire to save.

We are different, and these differences - when viewed appropriately - can make our marriage so much stronger.

The post When a saver marries a spender appeared first on FamilyToday.

Being a stay-at-home mother is a wonderful thing. Really, it is "¦

But there are times (sometimes seasons) that are incredibly lonely

We spend most (if not all) of the day around no other adults. Our only form of adult interaction is through the Internet (which, I believe, explains why so many stay-at-home moms struggle with addictions to Pinterest and Facebook "¦ but that's another topic).

We love our children, but they can't be our best friends. We need other women in our lives to fill that role.

The problem, though, is that building relationships with other women (especially in this season of life with young children) can be difficult.

We have to schedule around naps and sicknesses. And let's be honest "¦ taking a young child anywhere requires a mom to pack way more stuff than any woman should carry alone.

It's also difficult to make friends with other women because we are so insecure about ourselves. Opinions about parenting choices are so heated these days that we'd rather not be around someone who might disagree with the way we do something.

We moms need each other. I don't have to make the same decision as you to be your friend. Stay-at-home moms can be friends with working moms. Single moms can have friends who are married. Homeschooling moms can be friends with those who send their kids to public schools "¦ you get my point.

We are all on the same team, so it's time we start acting like it

If we did, I think there would be fewer lonely moms out there.

Loneliness isn't just "part of the job." There are some things we can do to fight it.

Here are a few tips for any of you moms out there struggling with loneliness.

How moms can cure loneliness

1. Reach out to other women

I would much rather be invited than do the inviting. I'm guessing I'm not alone in this. As women, we tend to fear rejection (not all of us, I know, but many do). I think it's because of this fear that we don't take initiative with other women.

But here's the thing. We can't blame our lack of friendships on anyone but ourselves "¦ if we don't try.

So join a MOPS group or Bible study. Get involved with a group at your church. Call someone. Invite her over.

Stop waiting for someone to reach out to you, and reach out to her instead.

2. Maintain perspective

Someday, it won't be so hard to leave the house. Someday, we won't have to work around naps anymore. On days when you feel especially lonely, remember that it will get easier to go places with children. These days will not last forever.

3. Leave the house

Go to a park or to the library. Sometimes, that's enough to take the loneliness away for the day. You don't necessarily have to plan something. Just get out and start up a conversation with whoever else is at the park or library.

4. Join a group of some kind

In high school and college, we had a built-in place to make friends. Now, especially if you're a mom who rarely leaves the house, those opportunities to make friends are harder to find.

You might have to create your own opportunities by joining a group of some kind: an exercise group at the Y, a mom's group at church, a Bible study, a ministry, etc.

Or sign your child up for something. You're bound to meet some other parents when you go to your child's event.

5. Look to God to fill your void

It's so tempting to think we'll be happy once we have a friend. If I only had (blank), then I'd be happy.

Unfortunately, even if you have a lot of friends, they are bound to let you down at some point or another. Then what? What happens to your happiness then?

We can't look to human relationships (any human relationships - that includes our husbands, our kids, our friendships, etc.) to fill a God-sized void in our life. That void is God-sized for a reason: because only God can fill it.

Make friends, yes, but look to God to fill your life first.

6. It really boils down to this "¦ take initiative.

Maybe the reason you don't have friends is because you aren't being a friend.

Ouch, huh? I probably should turn that sentence around, though "¦ maybe the reason I don't have friends is because I'm not being a friend. Maybe the reason I struggle with loneliness is because I don't reach out.

Are people going to let you down? Absolutely.

Could they reject you? Yes.

But they could also accept you. They could also become some of your best friends.

But you'll never know if you don't try "¦

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