I confronted her in an aggravated tone and she, through sobs and tears, told me that she had a splinter in her foot from earlier in the day. I was frustrated and had no idea why she hadn't done anything about it earlier. Not to mention the fact that it was such a tiny thing. I can't imagine it hurt that bad. She went upstairs and my wife got some tweezers and a needle to get the splinter out. My daughter was bawling the whole time I tried to get it out, but to no avail. At one point she asked, "Can we say a prayer?" She leaned into my wife's chest, and bawled some more as she tried to compose herself to pray. My wife looked at me, realized my impatience with the situation, and said, "Have compassion."

My daughter sat up, said a prayer while gently whimpering, and God, in that very moment, sent a lightning bolt from heaven and gave me a vision of an event that happened to me two months ago.

What did I see?

I saw myself, lying in bed in the arms of my wife, and I was sobbing. I had a splinter of sorts. I was facing unemployment and all I could do was cry. I had lost twenty pounds in 2 months and I was a broken man. I was inconsolable. Someone else looking in on that scene might have wondered, "What's the big deal? Lots of people have lost jobs, just go find another one."

As I heard my daughter pray, I felt God teach me through this child. Was the splinter a big one? Did it really hurt that bad? The answer is yes, it was big to her and it was causing her pain. As she asked God to stop the pain, I remember making that same plea every day for months as I lay prostrate on the floor of my closet. "God, please take away the pain." We've all made similar requests, but each in completely different circumstances. If you ever find yourself wanting to roll your eyes or minimize someone else's pain, remember the wise counsel from my wife and show compassion.

I'm grateful for a sweet daughter who had the courage to pray in the midst of her pain, and even more grateful for a kind Father in Heaven who has given me the opportunity to learn amazing lessons from His precious children.

Editor's note: This article was originally published on Ben Arkell's blog. It has been republished here with permission.

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Everyone wants to change the world, right? Or am I the only one? The older I get the more I'm resigned to the fact that I'm not going to be in the NBA, (that ship has sailed) I won't be the next Warren Buffett, and I'm not going to invent some cool gadget like Steve Jobs.

The realization of all this, combined with an experience I had with an old man and ice cream, has changed my perspective of success. My wife's grandfather lost his wife about 20 years ago, after 50 years of marriage. He's still kickin', having just had his 97th birthday in August. One of the things I like to do with my kids is visit him. My kids are so fun and cute and we all have a blast. We laugh, the kids sing for him, we clean his dishes, take out his trash, and even walk over to the store and buy him groceries.

Just as we were about to leave he would ask, "Who wants ice cream?" Of course, my kids would all cheer and follow their hobbling grandpa into the kitchen so he could scoop them out some. He would fumble in the sink to find a spoon and would always gripe about how hard it was to get the ice cream out.

After a few visits like this, a few things happened. One, my kids started to expect ice cream and would ask for it the minute we walked in the door, and two, I realized that the poor old spoon great grandpa used to scoop out the ice cream was not cutting it.

I had an idea! I was going to buy him a nice and sturdy ice cream scoop. The amazing part was I actually followed through! The next time we stopped to visit, we unveiled his brand new ice cream spatula. We're not talking some low quality scoop here - it was pretty much the Harley Davidson of ice cream spatulas! And he was EXCITED.

It was one of the times in life when you do something you feel like you should, and it makes you feel wonderful. But I never imagined the impact it would have on that old man. Every time after that, whenever we'd go over to his home and line up for ice cream, he'd pull out his sturdy ice cream spatula, look at me and say with a smirk, "You got this for me, huh."

This small event in my life helped me realize that I don't need to change the world. That's a pretty lofty goal and not within my reach. My new goal? Change the world for someone. As small and insignificant as my efforts were, it meant the world to great grandpa. The cool thing is, I'll never truly understand the full impact of what I did, but every time I think of him and this ice cream spatula, I'm reminded of Mother Theresa, who captured the essence of this story when she said:

"We can do no great things - only small things with great love." What small act of kindness can you offer that will change someone's world? Believe me, someone's waiting!

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We all have our struggles in this life. Sometimes it's easy to recognize the weaknesses of others and not see the good. That's how I was. Especially when I was young. Especially when it came to my dad. More than once I promised never to be like him.

I grew up with great friends who all had great dads. It seemed to me that the relationships they had with their fathers were a step above the one I had with mine. There were some things my dad did that made me upset - add to that the fact that he was always too tired to shoot hoops, and it made for a bad combination when trying to build a solid relationship with a teenage son.

I remember being very hard on my dad. I can still hear the words from my father ringing in my ears: "I know I'm a horrible father." He said it on more than one occasion, and it usually stemmed from me complaining about something he did.

Now that I'm a father I look back on his weaknesses a lot differently. In fact, it's a lot easier to be more understanding. What's hard to swallow is that the great things he did I'm just starting to notice, and now that he's gone, I can't properly give him the credit he's due.

One night my boys were asking me for a story. So I told them of the day my dad bought me a BRAND NEW pair of basketball sneakers. They were white high tops with black stripes on them and I swear they made me jump two feet higher. They cost $80, which in today's world would equate to $120. The first night I wore them I took great care to only have them on when I was in the gym. Once the pickup game ended, I changed into some other shoes and walked to the car, placed my new sneaks on the roof of the car, and fiddled with the keys to open the car door. I was basking in the joy of another great performance on the court, with these amazing new sneakers.

As I drove home, imagining the lucrative NBA deal that was sure to be part of my future, I realized I had never taken my sneakers off the roof of the car. I quickly pulled over, jumped out of the car, and my heart sunk as it hit me that my new prized possession, the key to NBA glory, my beautiful, expensive sneakers - were GONE. I drove back to the gym, trying to find them, but in the darkness of the late hour there was no hope. I had lost my sneakers on the very day they were given to me.

As I was telling my boys this story, I remembered something amazing. When I had gone home to tell my dad what happened, I don't remember his reaction. That's the fascinating part to me. I know that if he had flown off the handle and gotten angry, I would have remembered. But my only memory is this - the next day after searching for the sneakers on his way to work without any luck, he came home with a newly purchased pair of the same $80 sneakers.

After I finished telling my boys this story, I thought of a moment earlier in the day when I lost my temper and raised my voice at my boy for spilling his milk. I remembered the way I overreacted earlier that week when one of their bikes scraped up against the side of our new van. I thought of all the small and insignificant things that my kids do and how I never seem to be able to let it go without belittling them. It was then I realized that my promise from years earlier was coming true in a much different fashion than I had expected - I realized that I never would be like my dad. The greatest attributes of my father were the ones that, as a child, I could not see.

Dad, wherever you are, and as shallow as this apology and statement is, please know that one day I hope to be the man you were. I'm sure you are looking down with empathy and a smile. Your wings are well deserved. I'm sorry it took me so long to realize it.

The post I promised to never be like my dad appeared first on FamilyToday.

July 25, 2012 started out with an innocent trip to Macey's to purchase the infamous "Kong Kone" that my wife coveted as a child. While we were in line admiring the prospective dessert, I overheard some teenagers talking about "YOLO kissing." (YOLO is an acronym for "you only live once"). For those who are more clueless than I, this involves going up to a random stranger and kissing them. One of the teenagers was talking about another girl who apparently enjoys participating in the aforementioned activity.

After YOLO kissing was mentioned, one of the girls said the most shocking thing I've ever heard a human being say out loud. Don't worry, this is rated PG, but what she said stung me so hard that I'm now up at 12:46 a.m. writing a post about the subject. She said to one of the boys "I would love to do that too (YOLO kissing) but I'm hideously unattractive." (giggle giggle)

Say what???

My first reaction was how could anyone talk about themselves that way, and then I realized I had to catch a glimpse of this girl. Up to this point I hadn't seen what she looked like so I positioned myself in a place (by the Jell-O desserts) where I could see her, and she was a very decent looking girl. I wanted to go up to her and tell her not to talk about herself that way and let her know that she was a perfectly fine looking human being, but I was unsure what kind of reaction I would get.

Her comment made me sick to my stomach. I just didn't understand how someone could say this about themselves, let alone blurt it out in the deli section of the grocery store to her friends. I know some might feel they are hideous when they look in the mirror in the morning, but this was different and frankly uncalled for. What was her home life like? Did she have a father that told her she was beautiful? These questions were racing through my mind as I envisioned my own daughters and what they are going to think of themselves as they get older.

Since I didn't take the opportunity to say something to this girl, I'm going to say it here and hope that by the magic of the Internet it will find her and influence others along the way. In order for that to happen I need your help. After you read this, please share it on Facebook and invite others to read it. Maybe Macey's girl will end up reading this one day.

Here goes. I'm talking one-on-one with you Macey's girl.

First, let me say that you are perfectly capable of being seen as beautiful by anyone who took the time to know you. I saw beauty and I only looked at you for three seconds. You are not only capable of being seen as beautiful, you are worthy of it. But here's the thing - very few will see your true beauty until you can see it yourself.

This brief story will help you understand that last sentence. When I attended college I often visited an all-girls apartment complex. It was a wonderful site to behold. Thirty apartments, four girls in each apartment, 120 total women. Let's just say it was my favorite place to visit!

In this complex there were all sorts of women - a supermodel who was an actual supermodel, there were cheerleaders, there were "players," there were lots of very beautiful women. There were also some average looking women. I got to know all 120 of these women. Some I gave pineapples to, a large number I held hands with, many I cuddled with on the couch, and one I kissed. One girl in particular I became friends with had three very good looking roommates, though she was not as blessed with the beauty genes as her roomies were.

As I began to hang around these girls more and more, the one who was perhaps less endowed with physical beauty (let's refer to her as Jill) starting becoming more and more attractive to me. In fact, when I was around her, I wanted to be around her more and more and I was amazed at how she was literally transforming before my very eyes. She was more beautiful every time I saw her. It was a really cool thing to experience. My mind had a distance memory of her not being the most beautiful person but my heart was taking over.

Then something changed - almost like a flick of a switch.

We were hanging out with a few people in her apartment one night and for some reason the conversation was such that it led her to say jokingly, "I'm ugly." I think I had the same reaction with you (remember I'm still talking directly to the girl at Macey's) at Macey's that I had with Jill. I was stunned. I looked at Jill and thought to myself, "I thought you were pretty, but I guess I should believe you." When she said 'I'm ugly," I decided to believe her words more than my eyes and heart. After a few days I forgot about the incident and starting seeing her as beautiful again when, lo and behold, she made another self-degrading comment. I started to see a trend - Jill constantly put herself down.

To make a long story short, I fell out of "like" with Jill, mostly because the way I viewed her was different from the way she viewed herself. I saw everything good, and great, and beautiful, but she kept stripping that away. So Macey's ice cream girl, don't put yourself down. Self-degradation is VERY unattractive. One of the beautiful things that God has done for us, is he allows people to find each other attractive. Have you ever seen a couple and thought "Man, how could anyone be attracted to him/her?" If you haven't thought that, you are better than I am. The great thing is, I really believe that they are attracted to that individual. It doesn't matter what you think you look like, when someone gets to know who you are, your beauty grows and grows.

There is a happy ending to the story. "Jill" ended up getting happily married to a great guy and at last count they have three cute kids. Things worked out great for both of us because I ended up marrying the only girl in that apartment complex that I kissed (who happened to live with the supermodel) and I know I was literally guided by the hand of God to marry her. With that said, I'd be lying to you if I didn't wonder about Jill and I. What would have happened if she believed in herself?

If you can relate to "Jill," make a promise to yourself today that you will change for the better. Start seeing yourself as beautiful and the world will follow suit!

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